How To Become Sober: Climbing A Slippery Slope

Updated April 24, 2023by BetterHelp Editorial Team

There's no way to sugarcoat the fact: drinking alcohol, especially in excessive amounts, has no real benefits whatsoever. It will help you sleep, but that sleep may be restless instead of refreshing, and you'll potentially have the after-effects to manage once the alarm clock goes off. Alcohol can help you forget your worries for a while but often causes more than enough problems on its own. It can help you enjoy the company of others more, but should you be socializing with people you don’t like or align with while sober?

In terms of your health, your career, your relationships with others, and your self-respect, there are few reasons to drink and many reasons not to drink. Although all of us have our justifications for doing things we know we shouldn't, we know this to be true: alcohol has destroyed more families, lives, and fortunes than any street drug.

Becoming Sober Takes Consistent, Intentional Commitment

Social Drinking Versus Alcohol Addiction – What’s The Difference?

Many people think that they're in control of their drinking right up to the point where they realize just how dependent they've become on it. Because of its prominence in social situations and daily life, full-blown addiction can creep up on many people without them realizing it.

If you suspect you have a substance use disorder, it's possible that you do. A good, simple test is to stop drinking, completely, for a month. If you "could, but don't want to," you might seriously examine what role alcohol plays in your life. As with any addiction, chemical or otherwise, a good rule of thumb is that something that interferes with other aspects of your life has gone too far. If you've ever missed work, canceled social appointments, or made up excuses because of alcohol, you are more than likely using it in unhealthy ways and it is important to take action immediately.

In a way, overcoming alcohol addiction is like learning a foreign language; there are plenty of programs you can follow, but the difference between success and failure relies mostly on the dedication you have to overcome obstacles and keep on progressing toward your goal. This dedication doesn't come from choosing to stop drinking once, and then cruising along on the back of that decision. You will have to choose not to drink on a daily basis, or even several times a day. Also, like learning a language, you can't neglect what you need to do six days of the week, then try to make up for it with a heroic effort on Sunday. Daily work is the key. Be assured that with consistent efforts and professional help, people who try to overcome their addiction experience success every day.

Tips For Becoming Sober

You may think that quitting alcohol is a question of willpower and nothing else, but this is rarely the case. The craving you feel for a drink has its roots partly in your body's physiological responses. This can either be overwhelming if you don't understand the implications or easier to manage, as long as you take a few simple steps. A body that feels taken care of will be on your side when it counts.


Certain foods increase the craving for alcohol, while others reduce it. Strange but true: your body is an integrated system, and what you put into it affects how you will feel.

Maintaining a stable blood sugar level is important. With the strain you used to put on your liver regularly, this means eating whole grains and vegetables instead of sugary snacks. Natural foods digest more slowly, giving you more consistent energy as opposd to a soar/crash cycle, which can certainly provoke a craving for a drink.

You will also want to eat foods that will assist in getting your brain chemistry back to normal as soon as possible. Raw spinach, sunflower seeds, bananas, peas, and oily fish are all good for this. If your drinking habit has been going on for a long time, it's not the worst idea to consult a primary care physician about additional supplements, particularly of B vitamins.

Above all, remember to drink lots of water. Heavy drinkers are often chronically dehydrated, and your body is likely going to want to get rid of a significant amount of accumulated toxins in the coming weeks.


Among the many ways in which alcohol damages your body, its effect on your circulation is one of the most detrimental. People with a dependency on alcohol are much more at risk of strokes and heart ailments, and insufficient blood flow can cause a range of undesirable effects.

While running an ultramarathon might not be on your immediate horizon, simply walking for 30 minutes each day can help strengthen your heart, lower your blood pressure, and get the oxygenated blood flowing to where it's needed. Perhaps more importantly, a little exercise aids in normalizing the levels of neurotransmitters such as dopamine and GABA, which can improve your mood all day long and lessen your desire for alcohol.

You may be asking yourself: “Is this really how to sober up? Not only must I stop drinking, but I also have to eat like a rabbit and run like a deer?" In fact, giving up alcohol, eating healthily, and starting an exercise routine are all difficult to do – but when doing all three simultaneously, each makes the others easier.

How To Sober Up Quickly By Avoiding Triggers

Many people may neglect attending to the emotional aspects of addiction. This is not how to stop drinking, especially when emotional factors such as stress or depression are what caused a drinking concern in the first place.

One good way to go about resolving emotional connections to drinking alcohol is to have someone you can freely talk to, without shame or pretense. Group sessions with people in similar situations can be helpful, although a counselor you can contact at any time has distinct advantages. Simply expressing your feelings in words can have a powerful effect, much more so than usual introspection. Just knowing that somebody is listening can give you the strength to stay sober one more day, after which tomorrow is likely to be easier.

One common source of stress for most people is their job. While most of us aren't in a position to live without a job, you can certainly ask to reduce your hours, delegate responsibilities, and take on fewer new responsibilities. You will often be surprised at the level of support you will receive. From an employer's perspective, having a problem is bad, but addressing it head on shows responsibility and fortitude.

One thing many people who decide to stop drinking notice is that their so-called friends are not only unsupportive but will actively try to convince them to resume drinking. Such a stance may indicate that they do not care if you live or die, as long as you're around to amuse them or validate their own harmful behaviors. Find new friends, or spend time alone, but avoid stinkcing around such a toxic environment.

Finally, identify the routines and habits that often lead to one drink versus seven. These may take the form of going out after work, having a beer in front of the television, or recognizing any of a hundred apparently harmless patterns. As a person living with an addiction, you may subconsciously resist becoming aware of what leads to excessive drinking, so this is another spot where having a therapist comes in handy. Familiar places, people, and activities can all act in subtle ways to encourage you to drink, so shaking up the things you're used to is part and parcel of approaching healthy sobriety.

Withdrawal: What To Expect

One of the most challenging aspects of how to get sober is that alcohol addiction is not only in your mind – via pleasant memories of relaxation or an absence of anxiety – but also in your body. People with addiction to alcohol have brains and bodies that function differently from those of social drinkers or non-drinkers.

There are two stages of withdrawal. The first stage of alcohol withdrawal occurs almost immediately after ceasing to drink alcohol. While this part is not at all pleasant, it typically lasts no more than two days. Having someone to talk to may help you better endure this stage. You will probably experience headaches, uncontrollable shaking, fever, nausea, and even hallucinations. Therefore, you may wish to go through this part under medical supervision, especially if you’ve been a long-time drinker.

Once this “acute” stage is passed, you will hopefully feel better than you have felt in a long time. Between one and two months after quitting, however, long-term heavy drinkers (or narcotics users) who've stopped will experience something called post-acute withdrawal syndrome (or PAWS), which can persist for several months. It is in this period when most recovering drinkers experience relapse because this stage of withdrawal is characterized by symptoms that are primarily mental and emotional, as opposed to physical.

Your brain will be rewiring itself for sobriety, and this doesn't come without a toll. Insomnia, low energy, anxiety, and mood swings are all common features of this period. Your inner life may become so tumultuous that you might believe that you have no option but to return to drinking, as many do. Having a counselor experienced in addiction is essential during this stage, as they can help you stay strong during the most trying times. If you know this is coming, you'll be that much more likely to go through it with your resolution intact.

Don't Fear Failure

A common mistake people recovering from alcoholism make is to "fall off the wagon," either by having a single drink at a party or going on a binge. Lapses happen; it's okay to take the process one step at a time. Going from sober curious to sober usually takes time and patience.

The real error in this case is to allow one incident to destroy your willpower. No part of your mind should be allowed to say that experiencing one lapse means that you've failed in your pursuit to get sober. Don't use it as an excuse in a "Now I might as well drink anyway."

If this happens to you, just acknowledge that you've made a mistake and try to figure out what led to it so that you can avoid the same circumstances in the future. Talk to your counselor about what happened, frankly and openly, and try to get to the heart of the matter. Addiction and its causes are rarely simple. Having an extra set of eyes on your particular challenge is a helpful step in becoming sober from alcohol permanently.

The Final Step: How To Stay Sober

It's possible that, once you've overcome your addiction, you will be able to have an occasional glass of wine without your personal gremlin threatening to come out of the closet. Once you've experienced the improved mood, mental clarity, and sense of physical wellness an alcohol-free lifestyle offers, the chances are that you may not be tempted all that much to return to your former lifestyle.

This is not to say that you shouldn't be cautious. If you feel that day-to-day stresses or lifestyle factors are pulling you back down a path you don't want to walk, talking to a therapist should be near the top of your to-do list. Nobody needs to be alone with this, and a therapist can be a wonderful resource while you come to terms with the role alcohol plays in your life.

In working with either an in-person or online therapist, you will often discover that excessive drinking is only a surface phenomenon reflecting deeper problems. These may be internal conflicts that you need to resolve or a distressing life situation that has to change. While this can mean that you will have to make bigger adjustments than just quitting alcohol, these changes can be for the better as long as you have someone to help you keep things in perspective.

If you’re curious about seeing an online therapist, online therapy has been shown to be effective in delivering high-quality treatment to people with substance use disorders. Via videoconferencing, participants were able to have their therapists. Participants could do this regardless of where they lived, which provided help to those who lived in remote areas. Participants also reported feeling a high level of satisfaction with this method of therapeutic treatment. Meeting with a therapist through videoconferencing is also effective in the treatment of other mental illnesses.

In addition to having the flexibility to meet with a therapist regardless of geographic location, online therapy users can also schedule appointments at convenient times. How might this be helpful for people with an alcohol dependency? If you anticipate a future moment where you might need help, you can reserve an appointment in advance. Alternatively, if you are struggling in the moment, you can text your therapist to receive support. 

How BetterHelp Can Support You

Becoming Sober Takes Consistent, Intentional Commitment

An online counseling platform like BetterHelp can help. Their licensed professionals can guide you forward as you progress to an addiction-free life. They can meet with you anytime and anywhere, even from the comfort of your own home or if you prefer, even your car. Read below for some reviews of BetterHelp counselors from people experiencing similar issues.

Counselor Reviews

Riky is so insightful and helpful. Each step in therapy, she has been so kind and understanding. She makes you feel like you're on a team working towards recovery, rather than feeling alone.

I’ve been in recovery for four months now. My weekly conversations with Annalicia have been critical in maintaining my sobriety and in living a healthier, more organized lifestyle. She treats me with kindness and respect while providing invaluable advice and perspective concerning both my sober journey and dealing with feelings of anxiety. Whenever I sit down for a session with Annalicia, I know I can look forward to an open mind, an empathetic ear, and a meaningful exchange. In taking the initial steps to live soberly, I was stripped of my coping mechanisms; Annalicia, however, has provided me with useful tools to deal with stress and anxiety while helping me build a new system of healthier coping skills conducive to a sober lifestyle. I look forward to our continued relationship, as she has been a crucial asset to my mental health and my positive lifestyle.

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