Learning How To Cope With Female Orgasmic Disorder

Updated August 27, 2020

Have you noticed throughout your life that you have a hard time achieving an orgasm when you’re having sex? This can be very frustrating for women, but it isn’t all that uncommon. You see, millions of women have to cope with a condition known as a female orgasmic disorder. This is a condition that makes it difficult for women to achieve an orgasm, and it can cause a lot of strife. You might be worried that having this condition makes you unusual in some way or that you’re going to be undesirable. This is actually a condition that impacts 11-41% of women worldwide.

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Coping with the female orgasmic disorder can be difficult because it causes you many problems. Of course, you might be stressed out about not being able to orgasm even when you’re turned on, and you really want to. It’s also problematic because it winds up creating strife in many women’s relationships. Sometimes lovers will feel inadequate when they aren’t able to help a woman with female orgasmic disorder achieve an orgasm. This could lead to a rift in the relationship, and it wouldn’t be strange for it to cause confidence issues in both members of the relationship. If you want to have a satisfying life while living with female orgasmic disorder, it’s important to learn how to cope properly.

You Have To Accept It

You have to accept the fact that female orgasmic disorder is going to be a part of your life. If a health professional has indeed given you this diagnosis, learning to accept it and live with this disorder may be more useful in the long run than fighting it. With this disorder, you may feel frustration sexually and it’s normal to wish that things were easier or different. In a sense, you may mourn the loss of the sexuality you had desired to attain.  Having an orgasmic dysfunction like this doesn’t mean that you can never reach orgasm. It just means that it may be more complicated and you will need to make adjustments. One way to cope is to remove the focus off of the orgasm and just concern yourself with enjoying the moment in other ways.

Female orgasmic disorder can be a condition that you learn to live with. There are even many women who don’t know that there is such a condition and they just know that they have a difficult time reaching orgasm. Some women will be more distressed by this than others, and it’s okay to let yourself feel how you want to feel. Just know that you can have a healthy and happy sex life even if you’re living with an orgasmic dysfunction like this.

Talk To Your Partner

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One of the first things you should do is take the time to talk to your partner about what is going on. If you’re dating someone currently or if you’re married, then they should be told what is happening. Understanding that you have an actual orgasmic dysfunction might help to set your partner’s mind at ease in some ways. You see, many people wind up feeling like they’re the problem when you don’t reach orgasm. Your partner’s feelings might be hurt because they want to be able to make you happy. If you tell them that this isn’t their fault and that it’s merely a physical problem that you have, then it’ll help to assuage their fears and self-doubts.

Discussing how this orgasmic dysfunction makes you feel is appropriate, too. If it stresses you out that you aren’t able to reach orgasm often, then it’s fine to admit that. Just be sure to let your partner know that this isn’t something that’s happening due to mistakes. If you’re still enjoying everything that is happening and your partner turns you on, then letting them know is a good thing. It will help to boost confidence levels, and this can bring you closer. You can also talk about what can be done to make things more satisfying during sex if you’d like to, but it shouldn’t be the initial focus of the conversation.

Enjoy Sex Even Without Orgasms

Not being able to reach orgasm every single time you have sex is frustrating. However, it might be smart to just stop worrying about orgasms and try to start enjoying sex anyway. Many women have found that coping with female orgasmic disorder is more straightforward when they stop worrying about having an orgasm. Stressing out about whether you’re going to achieve orgasm might be causing you to lower your chances of actually having one. Also, you’re taking yourself out of the moment and you aren’t focusing on just enjoying the sexual experience with your partner. If you want to have a better sex life, then learning how to stay present with your partner and have a good time is critical.

If you’re turned on by sex with your partner and it’s still pleasurable for you, then reaching orgasm might not always be the most important thing. It could still be a fulfilling experience even if you don’t reach your climax every time you and your lover are together. You might orgasm sometimes and you might not have most of the time. It just depends on various factors, and this is why it makes so much sense to just focus on the sex and your enjoyment of it instead. Do you get joy out of being a giving lover? Perhaps you can focus on your partner’s pleasure while also just enjoying what they’re doing to you.

Orgasms Are Possible

You know that having an orgasm isn’t always going to be easy for you, but that doesn’t mean that it can’t be done. Sometimes you might need to make the situation just right so that you can reach orgasm. Female orgasmic disorder isn’t a desire disorder. You can still be immensely turned on and ready for sex while having this disorder. It just makes achieving orgasm tougher than it usually would be. If you want to have an orgasm, then it’s going to involve doing several things. The first thing that you need to do is reduce your stress levels.

Stress could be keeping you from achieving orgasm, and this could be the roadblock that regularly blocks you from crossing the finish line. If you can reduce your stress levels, then you’re going to have a much better chance of having an orgasm. Some people worry so much when they’re having sex that they get in their own heads and make having an orgasm almost impossible. Try to avoid doing this and let yourself go to a very calm place during sexual encounters. If you’re still having trouble reaching orgasm, then it might be prudent to try to do this alone first.

There are women who have an easier time reaching orgasm when they’re alone than they do when having sex. Sex can be stressful because you’re also focused on pleasing your partner. You could also be concerned about other factors such as how you look, whether you’re going to get pregnant, or any number of other issues that are related to sex. Masturbation is different because it’s just you and possibly your favorite sex toy. You might have better luck consistently achieving an orgasm using a sex toy such as a vibrator. Some women even discover that stimulating certain areas will make it much more likely for them to reach orgasm, and this could transfer over to sex with your partner.

If your partner wants to help you reach orgasm more often, then they might be able to try certain things. For example, some women have had better luck reaching orgasm when their partners perform oral sex. Many women simply can’t reach orgasm through intercourse alone because it doesn’t provide the right stimulation. There are many things to try, and you can discuss this as a couple. You might not have an orgasm every time, even if you’re doing everything right, and you’ve reached orgasm in the same way before. Don’t let this get you down and know that you’ll be able to get to a point where you’re just enjoying the sex, and you’ll sometimes be able to achieve orgasms. If your orgasm issues are more pronounced and it seems like you can’t ever have one, then it might be good to look into treatment options if it bothers you.

Seeking Out Treatment

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There are treatment options for a female orgasmic disorder that you could discuss with your doctor. As mentioned early, many women don’t seek treatment for this. Some just accept that they aren’t always going to have an easy time reaching orgasm and accept it. However, some women seem to have worse problems than others, and it makes it more likely that they will want to look into treatment options. There are a few treatment options to consider.

Most of the treatments involve using estrogen to try to stimulate the vaginal area in some way. Your doctor might prescribe a cream that can help you out or give you a pill to take at certain intervals. The female orgasmic disorder has also been treated with the insertion of vaginal rings that provide estrogen therapy. Estrogen receptor modulators could be used, and androgen therapy is also a possibility. Your doctor will examine your situation and suggest a treatment path that makes sense for you.

There can also be psychological variables that will play a role in your orgasmic dysfunction. You probably remember that stress can play a role in this disorder. Factors such as depression, anxiety, and personality disorders may also be related to what is going on. Some doctors might suggest visiting a therapist as a way to address these issues to see if they will help you out.

Talking To Someone Can Help

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If you’re feeling overwhelmed by emotions because of your issues with the female orgasmic disorder, then it might be beneficial to speak to a professional. Taking the time to talk to a therapist can help you to come to terms with what is going on in your life. It’s perfectly normal to feel emotional about things and not know what to do. You might need a little advice, or you might just need to vent your frustrations to someone who cares about your well-being. Having a therapist to turn to will make you feel better about the situation, and you can tackle the emotional problems that have been caused by this orgasmic dysfunction.

You can even pursue online therapy if you would like to enjoy therapy without having to leave home. Either way, you’re going to be getting high-quality therapy, and you won’t have to face this situation alone. Some people choose to bring their significant others with them to therapy sessions because the orgasm issues also impact their feelings. If you feel you need couple’s therapy, then a therapist would be more than happy to help. Seeking out both individual therapy sessions and relationship therapy could be very beneficial in helping you learn to cope with this condition.


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