Experiencing Love Addiction: Symptoms, Signs, And Treatment Options

Medically reviewed by Melissa Guarnaccia
Updated March 15, 2024by BetterHelp Editorial Team
Content warning: Please be advised, the below article might mention substance use-related topics that could be triggering to the reader. If you or someone you love is struggling with substance use, contact SAMHSA’s National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP (4357). Support is available 24/7. Please see our Get Help Now page for more immediate resources.

Love addiction is a proposed model of pathological passion-related behavior involving the feeling of being in love. People may go their entire lives dealing with pattern of love addiction symptoms but never know it, as it may not be widely discussed in their community. If you believe you may be experiencing this condition or symptoms related to it, there are a few coping strategies you might implement. When someone has a love addiction, they may become fixated on the idea of being and staying in love and this may negatively impact their relationships.

Ilona Titova/EyeEm
Are you addicted to being in love?

Discovering love addiction symptoms

The first step to a life free from love addiction symptoms may be admitting you are struggling. It might not feel easy, but it could lead you to resources or the understanding that you want support with your symptoms. 

If you display love addiction symptoms, no matter how mild or severe, try not to remain in denial. Admitting you’re experiencing distress can be brave. It is estimated that over nine million Americans struggle with love or relationship addiction, proving that you are not alone.

With social support and treatment, you may learn new behavioral patterns and habits to replace unhealthy desires or thoughts. 

What are signs of being addicted to love?

If you are experiencing a love addiction, you might find yourself moving quickly from one relationship to another and not giving yourself enough time to reflect upon the lessons learned from each one. Additionally, you may try to make a person fit you when they aren’t compatible. You might stay in relationships that don’t make you happy because you crave love and affection.

Ask yourself how long you have gone without a romantic partner when you end a relationship. If you think back on your adult life and cannot remember times that you had time alone or single, you may be experiencing signs of love addiction symptoms.

Once you have a general idea of your love addiction symptoms, consider researching self-help and behavioral addiction. You may be able to check out books at your local library or read through online medical journals. You might find that you relate to the experiences of others going through these symptoms.

On the other hand, you may also be experiencing symptoms of an anxious or avoidant attachment style. Insecure attachment styles may have similar symptoms to love addiction, as they often involve behavior patterns in intimate relationships. However, studies show that attachment styles can change with treatment and time. 

Breaking the cycle of love addiction

Your love addiction symptoms may date back to your earliest romantic relationships. The patterns of behavior associated with your addiction may feel challenging to reverse, or you might not know how to love someone in a different capacity than you are familiar with. 

Speak with your partner about your struggles. Tell them that you are taking significant steps to change your behaviors. Try to speak openly about your concerns. You may also try the following strategies for overcoming symptoms. 

Foster self-love and self-compassion 

If you want healthier relationships, you might also learn to love yourself as passionately as you may love others. Self-care could involve the following activities: 

  • Spending time in nature
  • Reading a book
  • Going for a walk with your dog or family 
  • Biking
  • Exercising
  • Swimming
  • Expressive writing through journaling 
  • Yoga
  • Meditation or mindfulness

Studies show that meditation is especially beneficial in increasing feelings of self-compassion. Other research shows that ten minutes of meditation per day can be enough to benefit your mental health. 

When you love yourself as deeply as you love others, feeling like you need a relationship to feel content may no longer be a reality. You might be able to find all the qualities you’re looking for inside yourself and find that another person complements those aspects instead of taking away from who you are. 

iStock/LSOphoto

Spend some time alone

Being alone may feel terrifying for someone experiencing love addiction symptoms. You may find that it triggers a fear of abandonment or memories from your past. 

Try to take time to get to know yourself. If you don’t feel safe at first, spending time with your pets or hugging a stuffed animal may make you feel less alone. Take time to go to dinner or the movies alone. You could take a long walk in the park on the weekends or treat yourself to a spa day.

Over time, you may find yourself starting to feel more comfortable alone. Learning the skill of being alone may also benefit you in a relationship, as your partner might not always be available to support you emotionally, physically, or financially. 

Be yourself

If you live with a love addiction, you might find yourself pretending to have hobbies, listening to music to please others, or feigning an interest in something you don’t like. You might do this to connect with someone else or try to convince them you’re a “good person.” 

This behavior may cause someone to fall in love with you for unhealthy reasons. Later in your relationship, you may experience loss or disappointment as your partner finds out that you are different than you stated initially. 

If you are true to yourself and your interests from the beginning, you might attract an individual compatible with your lifestyle and aligned with your values. They may be naturally impressed by you and love you for who you are. Your love could grow based on reality rather than forced interests or conversations.

A behind view of a man sitting in a chair behind a desk; he has his hands behind his head, and is taking a break.
Getty
Are you addicted to being in love?

Reach out for professional support 

Despite valiant efforts, you may find yourself craving professional support. If you feel stuck or unsure how to break the habits related to love addiction or attachment, consider speaking to a compassionate professional, such as a therapist. 

When it comes to addiction, many are afraid to seek professional help because of stigma, particularly in rural areas. Online therapy may make therapy more comfortable for those who cannot get therapy in person or do not have the time to attend physical appointments. You could also consider counseling for you and a partner. It may also be available to you and your partner. 

In a recent study, treatment modalities included online written materials, audio/video files, and therapist-guided communication via phone, video, email, and text. Evidence of online therapy for treating substance use disorders and other addictions showed that the approach was as effective as traditional in-person counseling. 

Online therapy may provide a safe space to explore symptoms, discuss goals, and benefit from resources designed to help you reclaim agency in your love life. You may choose to sign up for a platform such as BetterHelp for individuals or Regain for couples. Both platforms offer a vast database of counselors trained to support you with mental health symptoms. 

Takeaway

Experiencing a love addiction or attachment concern may feel isolating, scary, or worrisome. If you are ready to take control of your symptoms, consider the coping techniques on this list. You might also choose to reach out to a counselor to discuss your concerns further and learn about research-based treatment methods.
Receive compassionate guidance in love
The information on this page is not intended to be a substitution for diagnosis, treatment, or informed professional advice. You should not take any action or avoid taking any action without consulting with a qualified mental health professional. For more information, please read our terms of use.
Get the support you need from one of our therapistsGet started