Tips For Finding True Love That Lasts

Medically reviewed by Karen Foster, LPC
Updated May 15, 2023by BetterHelp Editorial Team

Have you ever wondered how to find true love that lasts? Despite the advances in technology and communication in recent years, more people than ever are turning to online dating and alternative forms of courtship. In many cases, they do this because they hope that these alternative options will help them find that special connection. 

Even then, there is no guarantee that what you find will be long-lasting or meaningful. So how can we make sure our search for lasting love is successful? By taking practical steps backed up by experts, you may increase your chances of finding companionship and leading a fulfilling relationship together.

What Is True Love?

It's a concept with many interpretations, yet no definition can be agreed on. However, the idea that love can mean something different to everyone and remain true is a valid point that supports the idea that no two stories of love are alike. 

Despite its complexity, true love captures a universal sentiment that has inspired a sense of wonder for a large part of human history, enduring in nearly every culture around the whole world and throughout time. What constitutes real love for one person may not perfectly copy what others experience but embraces an understanding of our humanity—studies show that there is an inherent benefit of connection in our lives no matter how it is ultimately achieved.

Ultimately, true love is about accepting understanding for every unique relationship, regardless of its expressions and differences.

Don't Let Love Take a Toll on Your Mental Health

True Love In Popular Culture

Popular culture will often present us with an idealized version of true love, in many cases showing that it can only be achieved if you finally find that “one right person”. The relationships we see in movies and television shows are passionate, perfectly timed, and without a hint of conflict or disagreement. 

However, this often contributes to an unrealistic expectation that these relationships can be replicated in our lives. Each person may experience or feel loved uniquely; no two relationships will manifest in the same way. Similar misrepresentations may be provided by people that consider themselves a “relationship expert.” It's a good idea not to take any advice you hear from someone without formal training that seriously. It doesn’t mean these people won’t be able to help you identify some red flags, but it's possible they are operating off of the stereotypes we often see in popular culture. 

Research shows that comparing our experiences to the ones we see popularized can be damaging if those comparisons lead to feelings of inadequacy around how deep and meaningful a relationship 'should' be. In reality, all types of relationships require work from both parties—effort must be put in for a bond to form and for partners to remain committed and connected.

What To Look For When Searching For True Love 

When searching for true love, one may look for selflessness, trustworthiness, and genuine connection. You may also want to look for someone who gets along with the people in your friend circle; in many cases, your friends can be good judges of a potential partner’s character. True love sometimes means accepting each other’s flaws and recognizing strengths in one another. It may require patience and understanding rather than an expectation of perfection. 

Everyone may have individual experiences of love and attachment; it can be wrong to pressure yourself to find true love if you have yet to experience a genuine connection with another person or feel a sense of comfort with them. It's not as simple as searching for what some may consider to be “good women” or “good men” (or those of any gender.) Who you choose will depend on your individual needs and sensibilities. 

No two people develop relationships simultaneously, so although it might be challenging not to compare yourself with those around you, perhaps shift your focus instead on creating your own emotional needs in any relationship you enter. These needs may cover a range of topics: for example, you may want someone to practice the same faith as you do or make a similar amount of money. 

Ultimately, what may be considered a good love life comes when we open ourselves up entirely and seize the right moment with courage and confidence; patience is critical.

Signs Of True Love In A Relationship

Research indicates that true love in a relationship has many significant physical, emotional, and mental health benefits. Defining true love is undoubtedly complex, and it can’t be boiled down to a single physical behavior like constant eye contact. Some common signs you can look for may include respect, trust, honesty, communication, compatibility, and understanding. 

Having a safe romantic bond can bring higher emotional stability and mental well-being. Couples with solid love often realize greater satisfaction while maintaining healthy relationships. With a fast connection to another person, physical and emotional boundaries are naturally drawn to express mutual love and commitment. 

Furthermore, partners of two individuals in a truly loving relationship can be more successful when working towards long-term goals together. Additional research has found that relationships characterized by these behaviors can increase overall happiness in older adults. 

Thus, it’s essential to recognize the signs of true love in any relationship and understand its potential to provide joy to all participants.

Signs A Relationship Doesn’t Have True Love

True love can be the cornerstone of a successful, long-term relationship. But, unfortunately, it may not always be easy to determine whether your relationship has true love. Common signs that a relationship might not have true love include frequent arguments, an inability to compromise, and a lack of respect. 

If you fight and argue the entire time you are together, or your disagreements more often devolve into yelling or name-calling rather than a clear resolution, it may signal a noticeable lack of love. Furthermore, attempts at compromise are often met with resistance, or one partner continually refuses to meet even halfway. As a result, the essential foundations of love and respect could be absent in that relationship. 

Relationships can be complex and ever-evolving entities, often full of both joy and hurt. Partners should recognize that it can be expected for relationships to have good and bad days. Learning coping tools during these times may allow couples to build trust in their relationship and strengthen their bond. 

Conflicts In Finding True Love

Each person has unique needs which can help define what they consider as the right kind of relationship to pursue. Consequently, conflicts can arise when it comes to finding true love, as what one person may define as this ideal will always be subjective to them. 

As such, journeys towards experiencing and enjoying lasting relationships can act as a personal self-inquiry, forcing individuals to explore and uncover what they’re attracted to, in addition to their wants and desires in a romantic setting. This can be vital to discover the most suitable partner that realistically meets their expectations and allows them to receive the same. 

Thus, there is no single correct answer in defining true love in any relationship; individuals must realize this for themselves and actively contribute efforts towards getting a meaningful connection with their chosen partner and navigating any challenges that arise during that process.

Benefits Of Online Therapy For Relationships And Finding Love

In recent years, online therapy has become a practical resource for helping people maintain and strengthen relationships and find love. Working with a therapist online can promote meaningful conversations around complex topics, allowing couples to understand each other's needs and values better. 

It also enables people who may be geographically separated to still count on steady support. Furthermore, video conferencing makes it easy to explore common patterns in dating relationships and develop concrete strategies for navigating potential conflicts that arise. By taking advantage of the power of online therapy, individuals may increase their insight into finding true companionship or enriching their existing connections.

How Online Therapy Can Help True Love Flourish

Participating in online therapy may help people build self-love and confidence, which are essential to finding lasting love. In addition, working with a therapist can be helpful while actively seeking relationships, such as navigating what it means to meet people that may be potential partners and building communication techniques to have healthy conversations. 

Online therapy may also provide insight into patterns in past relationships that one may want to modify to create healthy connections. With ongoing support from a therapist, individuals might expect how to: 

  • Explore how best to communicate their wishes and needs
  • Understand the triggers that contribute to struggles in the relationship
  • Learn how to interact with their partner more compassionately and mindfully. 

Therapy sessions can also provide strategies to bring out the best qualities of each partner, enabling them to deepen their connection for a safer bond.

Furthermore, studies demonstrate that online therapy can successfully “improve outcomes such as relationship satisfaction and commitment levels.” Therefore, therapeutic guidance can be the next step to success if a couple is committed to figuring out how they work together to move past difficult moments.

Tips For Finding True Love 

Finding true love can take effort and dedication. It’s essential to begin by identifying the kind of relationship you desire, such as a long-term partnership or something more casual. Having realistic expectations, searching for like-minded people, and knowing yourself may also be beneficial to finding someone with whom you have a lasting connection. 

Take advantage of available resources such as joining social clubs, attending church events, utilizing online dating sites, or venturing into your local community. Staying open-minded and not jumping into a commitment before assessing all the options can help create positive opportunities for developing honest relationships.

Some critical tips for finding true love:

  • Don't seek romance; look for partnership
  • Be yourself, always
  • Don't put too much pressure on yourself or the relationship
  • Take things slowly—don't rush into anything
  • Keep an open mind and communicate honestly with your partner
  • Spend time together doing something you both enjoy

Don't Let Love Take a Toll on Your Mental Health

Wrapping Up

Happy ending stories are proof that finding happiness and lasting love is achievable. Understanding yourself may be the first step in finding true and lasting love. Knowing who you are and what you want out of life can be vital to finding someone with whom you can have that journey. Being honest with yourself about your goals, values, and beliefs can help you make better decisions when it comes to relationships and could also give potential partners insight into who you are as a person. 

Investing in self-care and engaging in activities that bring joy can help create balance in your personal life, ultimately leading to better relationship outcomes. 

Understanding yourself first can make it easier to identify what type of partner would work best for you. You may also develop a better intuition for dealing with issues should they arise during the relationship. 

Remain Open-Minded

Once you know who you are and what type of companion would be most compatible with your lifestyle, it’s essential to remain open-minded when meeting potential partners. Just because someone isn’t exactly what you pictured doesn’t mean they won’t be able to provide the companionship and satisfaction that comes from being part of a healthy relationship. 

Being open-minded when searching for friendship or romance instead of focusing on one specific set of criteria may help widen your circle of potential companions and increase your chances of finding lasting love. 

Communication Is Key

No matter who your companion is or how long you have been together, communication remains essential for any successful relationship. It may be beneficial to establish common ground early on by discussing expectations from each other, financial responsibility within the relationship, family values and beliefs, and other areas where both parties have differing views. 

Talking about these issues sooner rather than later may help prevent misunderstandings down the line, potentially leading to conflict or even breaking up the relationship altogether. 

Additionally, having an open dialogue may allow both parties to express their feelings without fear of judgment while also gaining a better understanding of why certain things bother them or make them happy—which is crucial when forming solid bonds over time with one another. 

“Janie has been listening to my concerns and the things that are affecting me and my relationship. We have just started working together but she has given me a lot of good things to think about, recommended some reading, and is going to send me some prompts to think of ways to phrase my questions and thoughts to my wife in ways that do not make her fell that I am attacking her or that she needs to be defensive. I look forward to continuing to work with Janie to hopefully save my marriage.”

“Mrs. Carter is an excellent counselor. She listens and give great advice and pointers. It's only been about 3 weeks in counseling and she has helped my wife and I tremendously.”


Finding true love can take effort, but through online therapy, clients may be empowered to gain better insight into their relationship needs and values as well participate in interactive activities designed to help them hone their interpersonal skills so they make connections more easily. Online therapy may also provide those with the possibility of increasing the chances of leading a fulfilling life together with a companion who understands and supports all aspects of your life journey!

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