Love or money: What’s more important and why?

Medically reviewed by April Justice
Updated January 22, 2024by BetterHelp Editorial Team

Love is one of the greatest motivations that a person can have in life. Some people say that being able to experience love is important if you want to be happy. There are people who aren't as concerned about love as others, though. Some people are much more concerned with making money, and they may focus on financial success at the expense of their love lives. 

Take a moment to examine whether you feel you should be more focused on finding love or making money.

Getty/Halfpoint Images
Love and money are commonly at odds

Determining whether love or money is the most important thing in your life makes sense. You need to be able to prioritize things in your life. If you want to be as happy as possible, then you may want to think about whether what you're doing is going to lead you down the right road. This could help you better focus on your own life goals.

The importance of money and love

Money is a necessity in this world. You need to be able to make a certain amount of money just to be able to get by. If you make enough money to be comfortable, then you can start buying extra things to increase your standard of living. Being able to buy things may make you feel good about yourself and may make you feel like your hard work has been worthwhile. 

According to many resources, both scholarly and anecdotal, the importance of love and affection cannot be overstated. Most people have loved ones that they care about dearly. Even if you don't have a romantic partner, you likely have friends or family who love you. Being bonded with someone like this can make a difference when it comes to your overall happiness. It may also be beneficial to have someone you can count on during tough times. This can make it easier to get through tumultuous periods of time.

Getty/Halfpoint Images

All types of love can be important and are worthy of being cherished. For example, being “in love” can make you feel like the world is brighter. Friendship can have great value, and family ties are also something many people hold close to their heart. 

Finding a balance is key

Finding a balance in life is often the key to being truly happy. This means you may not want to focus on love at the expense of your career. There is an old adage that says, "Love doesn't pay the bills." Regardless, it isn't healthy to pursue financial success at the expense of your own happiness, either.

Many mental health experts advise people to find a way to balance their career goals with their relationship goals. That way, they’ll be able to enjoy everything that love can bring into their life while still achieving career success. Some level of financial success may make it possible to start a family as well if this is something you desire.

With this in mind, you may want to find a career path that gives you enough time to focus on the people and things that you love. For example, you’ll want to spend time with your romantic partner as well as the other important people in your life. Working all the time may not be healthy. Consider striving toward a more balanced lifestyle that honors your desire for both love and money

To achieve this balance, you may want to consider creating some type of schedule for yourself. If you're a bit of a workaholic, so to speak, then you might need to set some rules, like no answering work e-mails after dinner or putting away your phone when you're spending time with your romantic partner. 

Remember that money can't buy love

Consider the adage "money can't buy love". There may be some truth to this saying. For example, people might wind up flocking to you if you become rich, but it might not always be because they truly love you. Whether you're curious to know how to marry rich or are looking for someone rich, keep in mind that money isn't something that can truly comfort you when you're feeling down.

Humans are social creatures by nature, and we often inherently desire love. Financial success is admirable, and financial stability can bring some degree of happiness for many people. Still, it may be wise to differentiate between the importance of money and the true value of love.

Therapy can help you find balance

If you've been spending too much time focusing on advancing your career, and it has cost you some of your happiness, then don't be afraid to reach out for help. Trained therapists can help you address mental health challenges like these. Sometimes, people are hesitant to communicate their feelings about things like love and money with a stranger, even if that person is a trained mental health professional. This may be particularly true in a traditional clinical setting like a therapist’s office. In these cases, online therapy may be a better option.

Studies have shown that online therapy is useful for people who want to address complex feelings. In a study published in the Journal of Medical Internet Research, the effectiveness of online therapy when treating those with depression and anxiety was observed. Researchers specifically utilized online cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), which is meant to help participants replace intrusive, negative thoughts that can lead to undesirable behaviors and emotions. The study concluded that online therapy helps to facilitate significant positive results. 

Read below for some reviews of BetterHelp counselors, from people experiencing similar concerns.

iStock/Rawpixel
Love and money are commonly at odds

Counselor reviews

“Cameron has helped me navigate some incredibly challenging things within my relationship. With his help, I’ve developed confidence to be a more assertive person. Therapy had helped me understand myself and my partner much better, in addition to implementing practices and taking action to improve a situation whereas I otherwise may feel stuck or hopeless. I really loved that he took the time to get to know me and my history before trying to “tell me what to do”. I feel like he really understands how my mind operates and therefore can give great, valuable advice, in addition to being a comforting sounding board.” 

Logo, company name

Description automatically generated

“In the last 7 months or so, Lois has really helped me in reshaping my perspectives on my relationships and my involvement in them. I have seen a great deal of personal growth occur through her attention and guidance. I have been able to understand where my struggles had come from and deal with difficult ideas like blame and guilt. I'm very grateful for her time and attention and I'm confident that my personal relationships will be stronger and healthier as a result of working with Lois.”

A picture containing text

Description automatically generated

Takeaway

For many people, the value of love goes far beyond anything that can be bought. After all, people aren't expendable, and they also aren't on this planet forever. At the same time, money is necessary, and it can fulfill some of your desires. If you’re experiencing problems related to love and money, consider talking with a BetterHelp counselor today.
Receive compassionate guidance in love
The information on this page is not intended to be a substitution for diagnosis, treatment, or informed professional advice. You should not take any action or avoid taking any action without consulting with a qualified mental health professional. For more information, please read our terms of use.
Get the support you need from one of our therapistsGet started