19 Ways How To Make Him Worry About Losing You

By: William Drake

Updated July 17, 2020

Medically Reviewed By: Lauren Guilbeault

If you're in a new relationship, or if you're in a long-term relationship that seems to have fallen into a rut, you may be wondering how to make him worry about losing you. While it's healthy to want to be a good partner, it can be unhealthy to worry too much about your partner leaving you. The best way to learn how to make him worry about losing you is to focus on yourself. That's what this article is about: being the best partner you can be.

Here, we’ll tell you about ways to make him worry about losing you, and how you can be the best person you can be, so he does worry about that, but not in an unhealthy manner.

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This article will offer a few helpful tips. Many people worry about a partner leaving them. But this worry can create unhealthy habits and an unhealthy relationship. Instead, with the right help, you can foster a positive relationship with a new attitude toward your partner-a relationship that he will value, and he will worry about losing you in a positive manner. Times when many worry about using you is usually when you’ve shown him that you’re a worthwhile partner, and someone they want to be around. So here are some ways to really shine in his life, and to be the best you can be.

Be Spontaneous

You don't want your relationship to fall into a rut. To make him worry about losing you, be unpredictable and spontaneous. It's even better if you're spontaneous about things he enjoys. When he gets home from work, take him out to his favorite restaurant. Instead of the predictable weekend activities, do something unusual and fun. Surprise him with his favorite drinks in the fridge, for example. 

Express Love Daily

Never assume your partner knows how much you love him. You should be expressing your love to him daily, reminding him why he wants to keep you around. Do this in many ways, not just by saying "I love you." (After all, saying, "I love you" every day might be overwhelming to some people.) Give him a back rub after a long day, cook him a nice dinner, or do anything he will enjoy. There are a million ways you can show you care, and it can make them worry about losing you, since they know you really do care. A man worry about losing the one that they love when they realize there isn’t love there, so if you do show that, they won’t worry about possibly anything bad happening down the road.

Be Open and Honest (and Confident)

Honesty is a must for any good relationship. If you want him to worry about losing you, be completely open about your feelings. Honesty isn't simply not lying. It's speaking up when something is wrong. It's telling him when you're feeling insecure and why. It's letting him know everything about your life and your life together. If you embrace yourself with confidence, it will show him that you're worth valuing. Don't worry if you struggle with self-confidence-try these tips to start. There are times when a man worry about losing those that they care about because they notice that there is a rift there. Closing that rift shows you care, and you do ant them in your life.

Have Good Communication

Good communication is also important for a healthy relationship. Communicate with your partner about everything in your life. Even when something seems small, keep the lines of communication open. Some may worry about losing their partner when they can’t communicate, so communicating helps prevent that.

Communication isn't just about talking to your partner. It's making sure you're understood, and that you understand your partner as well. Good communication is open, honest, frequent, and involves both talking and listening. It may seem weird that this may signify worry about losing someone, but it does happen. People prefer communication, and they want to communicate with those they care about too.

Make Compromises

If you want him to worry about losing you, be prepared to compromise. One person can't always be right. Don't worry about who is right or gets their way, but rather what is best for both of you and the relationship as a whole. Sometimes, seeing that you’re willing to compromise will create worry about losing you, because a lot of us are stubborn, and we don’t normally do that.

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Making compromises sometimes means you give him what he wants now in exchange for getting something you want later. There are a lot of situations in which a compromise is not possible, and one person must get their way. If it's not detrimental to you, be prepared to sacrifice to keep the peace, because this will make them worry about losing you. Not everyone’s willing to compromise, and that can be seen as a positive trait.

Cultivate Positive Qualities

One of the best ways to keep your partner by your side is to remain positive and have positive qualities. Positive qualities are things like kindness, being affectionate, being patient, being friendly, and being understanding. One way to make someone worry about losing you, is making them realize you have the qualities that they want in a partner, and they start to notice you slipping away, they will worry about losing you simply because you’re a positive element in their life, and they want you around for that.

A study in 1991 researched groups of partners who were dating, engaged, or married. They found that in all cases, positivity was a large factor in a successful relationship. You must remain positive and have open communication to make a relationship work. Positivity is contagious, and if your partner struggles with it, they may worry about losing you because you’re not being a positive force in their lives.

Take Care of Yourself

You may not always feel like dressing up or putting on makeup, and that's completely okay! However, it can be easy to fall into the trap of cuddling on the couch and ordering pizza every day. Although this does sound comfortable, it's also a good idea to keep prioritizing physical exercise and general activity. If your partner is a good-looking guy, he may already be going this, but if you don’t want to worry about losing your partner, or them losing you, don’t be afraid to take care of yourself as well.

Don't feel obligated to constantly look like you're ready for a night out on the town. But making sure your clothes are clean, and that your hair and teeth are brushed can make your partner feel you're trying to be your best self, and they’ll worry about losing you, because you’re such an attractive person, and they don’t want to lose that. A little hygiene goes a long way, and this goes for both parties!

Accept His Friends

Never try to separate your partner from his friends. Especially friends he's had since long before you were together as a couple. You don't have to like his friends, and you don't have to spend time with them, but they should be respected and accepted.

Accepting his friends means you accept that he has interpersonal relationships he wants to maintain. It's about giving him space and agency in his life. Never make him feel he must choose you over his friends.  Guys who see girls who will give them the freedom to be with their friends will start to worry about losing you, because not every girl is not super controlling like that.

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Make Yourself His Best Friend

At the same time, make yourself his best friend. He will have best friends he hangs out with frequently and goes to for "guy things." But for most problems, comfort, and discussion, he should want to come to you for that support.

To make yourself his best friend, you have to be willing to play the part. You may need to play devil's advocate when he's making an important decision, or simply be there for support if he's going through a tough time. By always making yourself available to him when he needs you, you'll find he comes to you more often than his other friends for this support. If you guys are best friend, he will worry about losing you. After all, it isn’t just a relationship at this point, but also a best friend that they’ve come to know and love.

Don't Pick Fights

It's also important you don't pick fights. Disagreements happen between couples all the time, it's a perfectly natural thing. But pick your battles carefully. Many things are not worth fighting about.

There is a book by George Robert Bach and Peter Wyden that is highly recommended by psychologists and couples therapists called The Intimate Enemy: How to Fight Fair in Love and Marriage. The book outlines when you should fight and when you should back down, and how to argue with your partner in a healthy way that will lead to mutually beneficial resolutions. He will worry about losing you if the two of you have a cordial relationship, so don’t be afraid to iron out disagreements when they happen.

Give Him Space to Be Himself

Don't smother him. People need space. It allows them to be themselves, unwind, and explore life on their own. You want to spend time with your partner, but for a healthy relationship, you should also spend time apart.

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Give him space to do things on his own or with his friends. Many partners are far too clingy. If you want him to worry about losing you, make his friends jealous by giving him all the space he could ask for. He will worry about losing you, because not every guy wants a clingy girl around.

Be a Good Listener

Part of being a good communicator is being a good listener. But be prepared to be a good listener when communication is not the primary goal. There are times when your partner will need to simply talk about something on his mind-a decision that has to be made, or something that's bothering him.

Being a good listener is about trying to understand so you can offer comfort and support. When you only listen to respond, you are not a good listener. Listen just to listen, and only offer input in these situations when it's asked for. He will worry about losing you, because not everyone is willing to listen, and that of course is big part of it.

Be Respectful

Respect must be shown by both sides at all times for a healthy relationship. Showing respect means you don't belittle him, berate him, or abuse him in any way. When you show respect to your partner, he'll respect you in turn and not want to lose you because you treat him well. Respect is a two-way street, and if you don't respect him, he'll not respect you. Respect is the cornerstone of a healthy relationship. He will worry about losing you because he knows you respect him, and the two of you can work together to build the best relationship possible.

Be Intimate

Frequent intimacy with your partner is important. Intimacy doesn't just mean sex. It also means being affectionate in other ways. Hugging and kissing is intimacy. Talking is intimacy.

You can also be intimate with your partner by cuddling, maybe while watching a movie or while simply sitting and talking about your day. Holding hands when you walk down the street, leaning into each other at the movies, or even a gentle squeeze while out to dinner can also be forms of intimacy. If he knows you like being intimate and showing you care, he will worry about losing you, because that intimacy, that emotional connection, truly does mean a lot.

Share His Interests

You won't share all his interests. You obviously have some compatibility, or you wouldn't be a couple, but that doesn't mean you both like all the same things.

But you can still participate in his interests. If he likes sports, take him to a ball game. If he likes comics, take him to Comic-Con. Try to enjoy yourself, but most importantly make sure he enjoys himself. When you both share in each other's interests, it allows you to become closer and be each other's best friends. If you both can share common interests and you can try to understand his interests, whatever they may be, he will worry about losing you, and will want to keep you around.

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Show Your Appreciation

Frequently show your appreciation for your partner. Say please and thank you. When you're constantly appreciative of everything he does for you, he'll realize you love him and want to keep him around. He'll also want to stay with you because it always feels good to be appreciated.  He will worry about losing you especially if you show that you appreciate him, and that you care about him as a person.

Love Languages

Research The 5 Love Languages, by Gary Chapman. His book outlines five ways to express and experience love: receiving gifts, quality time, words of affirmation, acts of service, and physical touch. Knowing your partner's love language will help learn more about your partner and in turn provide a closer bond.

A Few to End With

The last few can seem somewhat stereotypical, but there is a kernel of truth behind all three. For example, the nagging wife has been shown on every sitcom since the invention of television. While it can seem campy, it's great advice to avoid nagging anyway.

Another stereotype is the girlfriend or wife who's in charge of the cooking and cleaning. In the 21st century, these tasks are often split between partners. In fact, many husbands opt to stay at home and raise the kids. Still, everyone enjoys a clean and organized space. It's a loving gesture to clean for a loved one, regardless of gender. Do what you can to keep things tidy, and hopefully he will reciprocate.

Lastly, most men (and women) need their alone time. A partner can be totally put off by smothering. Your partner may need time by themselves for solitary activities. Try to offer support while also stressing that time together is important. Time together and time apart are vital for a healthy relationship.

Get Relationship Help

If you want to make him worry about losing you, and it's something you worry about frequently, there may be a problem with your relationship. The methods above are great, however, you might want to look into therapy. He may already worry about losing you, but there might be some issues the two of you have to iron out, and that can be done through the use of

When you constantly worry about keeping your partner, you can't enjoy the relationship. When it becomes an obsession, it's important to seek the help of a therapist. They can help you identify why you're worrying, and help you decide if the relationship is healthy. A couples therapist can also help the two of you work together for a healthier relationship. BetterHelp is especially convenient if your partner joins in the session. Below are reviews of some great BetterHelp counselors, from people experiencing similar issues.

Counselor Reviews

"Rachel is awesome! Gently encouraging and very responsive. I prefer to communicate via messages and I love that that is an option. I feel that she totally understands me and is never judgemental. The stress from work impacts my partner less since I've been talking to Rachel - I am managing my stress and insecurity better."

"I would refer Helen to anyone that would need to speak to a counselor. She listens and gives excellent advice. My husband and I are the closest we've ever been."

Conclusion

Worrying about a partner leaving can be unhealthy. Striving to be the best partner is far healthier. You can help make your relationship the most fulfilling possible by integrating the tips suggested above. A counselor can also help to implement certain tips, like improving your communication and confidence. Take the first step to the best relationship today.

FAQs

How do I make him worry about losing me?

Making him afraid of losing you includes focusing more on yourself to make him realize your value. To make him scared of losing you 8 ways, there are things you can do to keep him interested. Be yourself, and take care of yourself by doing what you enjoy most. Maintain your social life with family and friends. Be comfortable and confident in your abilities. Don't answer your text messages from him right away to heighten is suspense regarding your whereabouts. Have respect for him and his friends.

To get him afraid of losing you, the idea is to engage in healthy actions to encourage positive behaviors in the relationship. Doing so also keeps him from losing interest. Why care about how to make a man worry about losing you? You want your partner to see you as someone they want in their life. What you do to make him worry may change his mind about leaving.

How do I make him realize my value?

When seeking dating tips, it's common to wonder how to make a man interested. Sometimes women don't feel valued in a relationship and wonder if he is losing interest in her. A healthy love life includes being with someone that appreciates you. Do your best to be yourself. Stay productive doing things you enjoy. Use actions to express how you feel. Let him reach out to you more via phone calls and texts. Spend time with your friends to get his attention. Sometimes you have to say 'no' to his requests. Make sure you recognize your worth, so you don't underestimate yourself. Sometimes a little action on your part is enough to change his mind positively about how you appear to him.

How do you make him regret for hurting you?

It can be challenging to focus on your love life if you've been hurt by someone you love. Tell him he hurt you. He may not realize he did, and he'll gain another perspective of his thoughts and actions and how they make you feel. Just focus on your emotions and what you are feeling but avoid personally accusing him.

How do I stop him from taking me for granted?

If he is not considerate of your needs, or you feel like doesn't treat you right, it is time to reevaluate your relationship. Maybe you think he's taking advantage of you because he's losing interest in you. Find out if he's using you or if he depends on you. What are your boundaries for the relationship? Are you meeting your needs or putting his before yours? Let him know how you feel and be direct with your feelings. Avoid attacking him about being taken for granted, but communicate it in a way to help understand how you feel. Set boundaries to ensure you meet each other's needs to encourage a healthy relationship.

If he is not willing to work with you or seems as if he doesn't care, it's time to consider ending the relationship. You don't have to live your life with someone that doesn't care about your needs. Sometimes his actions may relate to how he feels about you, including if he's afraid of losing you. Letting him know how you think may help change his mind about how things should be in the relationship.

How do you test a guy to see if he really loves you?

It's important to pay attention to how often he spends time with you. If he makes an effort to spend time with you regularly, he wants to be with you. If he goes out of his way to make time for you, he values your time. If he seems like he doesn't care, puts off plans, or cancels often, you may not be on the same page. He could be playing games with your emotions or losing interest. Sometimes a guy only views the relationship as being friends with benefits. If a guy is afraid of losing you, he may do the same while testing you to see if you love him. You can get an opinion or love advice from a trusted friend, family member, or therapist for more insight. Keep in mind it may take a certain amount of time to know if he loves you, so have some patience.

Does silence make him miss you?

It can if he likes you. Pay attention to his behavior and look for clues. When a man is interested in you and wants to be with you, silence makes him miss you. Some women use silence as a way of using their feminine energy to draw him closer. Sometimes silence makes a guy afraid of losing you, especially if you reduce or briefly stop communicating with him on social media or you don't answer his text messages right away. It may also make him realize he's losing you if a considerable amount of time has passed.

Silence may also help you find out if he's losing interest in the relationship. Assess what had happened when it was silent. What did you assume his reaction would be? If your assumptions were accurate, is he losing some interest in the relationship? If he limits communication during a period of silence or doesn't hint at missing you or wanting to be with you, it's possible he's really losing interest.

How do you make a guy realize he's losing you?

It seems like women are more afraid of losing their boyfriends, but a guy can be afraid of losing his girlfriend just the same. While you're not playing games at this point, you need to know if he's losing you and top signs to help him pay attention. To make him fearful of losing you 8 ways, consider how to focus more time on yourself. If he likes being with you, he will make the necessary effort to do so. In the meantime, minimize communications with him and turn down plans he makes at the last minute. If you manage to go out on a date, take notice of his behavior.

Eventually, you'll need to talk with him to see where your relationship stands. Consider how he has responded to your actions. Based on your assumptions, are they accurate, is he losing some interest in you? Maybe your efforts helped to change his mind about what he should be doing. His fear of losing may be realized. Is he too busy to spend time with you, or is he losing interest? He's really losing interest if he seems like he doesn't care about your feelings or thinks the relationship is going nowhere. You can seek relationship advice from close friends or a therapist. He may not be afraid of losing you if he's so preoccupied, he doesn't set aside time for you.

What makes a man fear losing you?

When you focus on things that matter to you like your social life, minimize communications, and doing things with him to make him afraid of losing you. He may assume you're losing interest in him if you're consumed doing other activities. A man will fear losing you when he sees you're happy doing things that may not include him. A woman may fear losing a man in the same way. It may make him realize he needs to get his act together and do more if he wants the relationship to work. Sometimes a man is afraid of losing his partner if he has strong feelings for them but is not sure how to express them.