Are anger issues inherited?

It sure seems like anger is an inherited emotion in a family. Many people can look back at their parents, grandparents, and great-great-grandparents and see patterns of anger. You may have siblings, cousins, and Aunts and Uncles who are all angry. Researchers agree that anger is not inherited. It is a learned pattern that can be handed down from generation to generation. Just because you come from an angry family does not mean that you must live with anger. Also, so many people see anger as a “bad” or unhealthy emotion. Anger is a normal emotion that comes and goes just like other emotions. Anger can help you see unhealthy patterns, relationships, and injustices in the world. All of us get angry sometimes.  Our reactions to our anger can be an issue. For example, if you start punching or cursing at everyone who makes you angry this is a huge issue!

Learned behaviors of anger can be losing our temper, telling a person off, throwing things, yelling, shutting down and refusing to talk to someone, lashing out at our loved ones, or irritability. Anger held in will come out in the body in other ways such as health issues, overwhelming stress, or feeling like you do not want to get out of bed. Anger can be controlled and dealt with. If you are struggling with anger or living with a family who is angry there is help out there. BetterHelp therapists can teach you how to learn what makes you angry, how to feel less angry, and how to respond to someone who is angry. Just as anger and unhealthy coping skills can be learned healthier coping skills and how to control your emotions can be learned. It is often hard work but rewarding work. Remember your feelings are temporary and always change. Sometimes we all get stuck and feel it is impossible to change.  Some people feel that anger is masking another emotion. Sometimes it is depression, anxiety, self-doubt can all create these feelings.  Many times, anger is just that anger.   It is important to learn about and try to learn how to regulate how you react to your anger. At times it feels like everywhere you turn in society people are angry. It can be exhausting! Leaning into self-care, exercise and mediation can start the process of helping your anger. It only takes one person in a family to change how a family interacts with each other. If you are struggling with these feelings please do not hesitate to reach out for help.