How can I deal with my intense anxiety when it gets to be too much to bare?

Hi Yams,

Thank you for your question. This is a very brave step you are taking with reaching out for help. You're not alone in this struggle with anxiety. Anxiety is often one of the main reasons people seek out therapy. Anxiety can be overwhelming, crippling, and as you put it, debilitating. Lack of sleep and the drain from a panic attack can only increase the impact of the symptoms.

There are a few process questions I would encourage you to consider as you work through finding ways to decrease your anxiety.

-When was the last time you felt confident and good about yourself? What was different about that time versus now? What can help you get back to those feelings?

-Who are you without the anxiety and constant worry?

-What is going well in your life right now?

-Who is in your support system? How can you get the support you need during this time?

-What lessons can be learned from this time that can aide you for challenges in the future? When you think about six months or a year from now, what do you want your journey to look like? How do you want to describe to others how you were able to navigate this tough time?

In Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), one main focus is interrupting negative thought patterns and replacing them with alternative ones that can give you a more positive outlook on your situation. Instead of thinking that people are viewing you in a negative way, perhaps reframe the thought as “This is a difficult and anxious time where I don't feel my best, but many people have experienced this and I can get through it." It might also be helpful to see this time as a great opportunity for self-growth and to enhance coping techniques and self-care.

In Narrative Therapy, part of the journey is to help clients start living their preferred story. For example, write out how you see what your life's journey has been up until this point. Think about what you would want your preferred narrative to be versus the one that you are currently living. Then write out that preferred narrative. Ask yourself "What would it look like to live a fulfilled life"? How would things be different in my life if I practiced daily self-care and managed my anxiety in a healthy way.

Getting to the place of managing anxiety can be a difficult journey, but worthwhile. I encourage you to be kind and patient with yourself as you work towards managing this challenging time and get to a place of improving your well-being overall.


A few tips for now:

-Deep breathing exercises are a great way to manage anxiety and stress. As well as mindfulness and meditation techniques. You can find guided regimens online through videos and wellness sites. 

-Keeping a journal is a healthy outlet for your thoughts. Use it to process some of the questions posed above and the emotions you mentioned you have been experiencing.

-Movement is a good way to work out anxiety. Perhaps do a work out when feeling anxious. It could also help to just get outside and take a walk. 

-Develop a good self-care routine. This can help with anxiety and stress management and boost positive feelings.

-Do additional things to boost your self-confidence: Find 2 to 3 things daily that you did well or went well for you and write them down. Seek out positive affirmations. Think about what gives you purpose and fulfillment.

-Use your support system in a healthy way. Seek out the people in your life that support you, make you laugh, help you with calmness. Ask for their guidance in this situation.

-Make a list of hobbies and interests and seek out ways to do them or find something new to learn.  

-Volunteering is a great way to do something meaningful with your time while meeting new people.

-A mental health professional can provide additional support as mentioned above.