How do you prevent anxious thoughts from waking you up at night?

Hello Bella,

This is a great question. Anxiety is a common problem that often accelerates at nighttime. The reason being, is this is the time of day when you get quiet. Activities slow down. You aren't as physically busy at bedtime as you are during the day. Therefore, the brain sometimes becomes more active. Your thoughts may drift to thinking of things that normally wouldn't bother you. The brain may overthink or second guess your decisions throughout the day. Sometimes it seems to look for things to worry about, such as conflict or drama. The spotlight effect of anxiety makes the problem seem bigger than it is. It can magnify the problem giving you tunnel vision which makes it hard to see the solutions. 

Author, Jen Sincero says, "There are no stressful situations - only stressful ways of perceiving situations." She goes on to say worrying is like walking around hitting yourself in the head with a rock over and over, so you are prepared in case you get hit in the head by a rock one day. Worrying is often the worst case scenario amplified to the point of causing you physical symptoms: insomnia, headaches, stomach discomfort, panic attacks, etc. Even if the worst case scenario (which really isn't likely) does occur, you will have experienced it twice by worrying about it ahead of time. 

You seemed to have mastered control of your thoughts during the day. The struggle is mostly occurring at night. Here are some ideas to help you manage your thoughts before bedtime:

1) Keep a notebook or journal near your bed. Write down any intrusive thoughts that come to mind. Consider this activity a brain dump. You are downloading your thoughts from your head and onto the paper. Don't think of it as a formal journal entry or homework. Don't worry about grammar or writing in complete sentences. This is just an exercise to get rid of the anxious thoughts. Once the thoughts are on paper, the brain lets go of them. You will want to keep is close when you are sleeping in case you wake up and need to write any new thoughts down. 

2) Try to limit screen time and blue light before bedtime. Screen time can stimulate brain activity and may contribute to keeping you awake. The blue light that your phone emits (which is as bright as daylight), discourages sleep. There are ways to filter out the blue light. Try using a blue blocking app, like Twilight for Android phones or Unblue for Apple phones. iPhones have a night shift setting to make nighttime viewing more bedroom friendly. It's a good habit to to turn your phone off 30 minutes before you go to sleep. It's also helpful to charge it across the room on in another room, so you are not bothered by distractions. Another idea is to turn off the notifications if you don't need your phone for an alarm in the morning. 

3) Make a routine for yourself before going to bed. Do the same thing every night in order. This sequence lets your brain know it's time to settle down. Go to bed at the same time each night. An article from Harvard Health explains a regular sleep schedule not only tends to increase the amount of sleep people get each night, it can also improve the quality of sleep.

4) Listening to a guided meditation or sleep story may be helpful. The brain will have something relaxing to focus on versus finding things to think about and/or worry about. There is an app called Balance that offers 3 minute and 5 minute meditations. You can also select sleep specific meditations that are longer. 

5) Use externalization to shift the anxiety to a physical form. Picture yourself conquering the problem. For example, you can imagine yourself sitting by a stream. Use imagery to make the picture vivid in your mind. Take each worry and place it on a leaf. Watch the leaf float downstream and away from you. Picture it leaving your field of vision and going far away where it can no longer bother you. 

6) Talk back to your brain. When anxious thoughts pop up, talk back and tell your brain, "No, I'm not going to think about that." Picture yourself hitting the "delete" button. "NO, Brain. We aren't going there." DELETE. 

7) Talking to a therapist might also be helpful. A professional can listen and offer coping strategies. A therapist is a nonjudgemental party who can help you gain insight about the root of the anxiety. A therapist can also help to identify potential triggers and make a specific plan for managing each one.