What are some techniques you can use to get out of your head?

Thanks for reaching out.  Many of us struggle with being wrapped up in our head.  Often, we experience thoughts and emotions- and will give those thoughts and emotions a lot of power and energy in our lives.  I would guess that some of the thoughts that drive you to be anxious- “Am I saying the right thing?, Does this person even want to be around me?,” etc.- you have been practicing those thoughts for a long time. In fact, some of us have been practicing those thoughts for 40 years or more!  Yet, they are just thoughts- not always fact. 

I want you to imagine that you are on a bus.  In fact, you are the driver of the bus, driving the bus to what you want in life- whether it be a life filled with beautiful relationships and connections, financial prosperity and growth, or something else, perhaps freedom.  On that bus, there are passengers on the bus that will get “in the way” of you trying to drive towards a meaningful life.  Those passengers are the thoughts and deeply held beliefs that sometimes trip you up- make you anxious and perhaps, cause you to shut down.  You are the driver of the bus.  You can make a choice to feed sugar or caffeine to the passengers on the bus- give them energy to get louder- or simply continue to drive the bus and move towards what you want in life. 

Those “things” that happen in your head are simply letters and words- we, as humans, give them meaning.  We can choose to give them more energy or move in our valued directions towards a meaningful life.  One way to practice doing this is through mindfulness practice.  To do this, I encourage clients to start by simply taking deep belly breaths.  When we get wrapped up in our anxious thoughts, often, we are breathing through our chest. When we breathe through our chest we are often taking shallow breaths that increase our overall level of stress.  However, we need to breathe through our belly to elicit our relaxation response of the parasympathetic nervous system.  To do this, take a deep breath through your nose for 4-5 counts, filling your belly like a balloon, hold it for 4-5 counts, and breathe out through the mouth for 6-7 counts, deflating the belly.  Do this for 5-10 repetitions initially when you notice your anxiety increasing.  Eventually, work up to 10-15 minutes of daily dedicated mindfulness practice. As you notice the anxious thoughts while you are breathing- recognize the thought, thank your mind for the thought- but don’t feed it.  Allow it to be there while you continue to do what you set out to do- 10-15  minutes of targeted breathing practice. Once this has become a routine, I encourage you to expand your mindfulness practice.  Being able to do this daily as a practice, will make it easier to be in the present moment in day to day activities.