How do I move on?

I am so very sorry for the loss of your MIL, mom, dad and son and in such a short span of time.  This would be difficult for anyone, so you are not alone.  It is unfortunate for the many losses of loved ones caused by Covid.  Many lives have been altered and changed as a result of this pandemic.  It is always difficult losing a loved one and that is compounded when you have multiple losses back-to-back as you have experienced. 

The fact that you are able to reach out for help and ask your question during what may be one of the most difficult and lowest moments in life is a testament to the strength you have within.  I hope that you can recognize that strength within.    

Moving on can be difficult, but it is possible.  The pain and grief you feel now will eventually fade away.  Take one day at a time as they say.  Try to find ways to honor and remember those that you have loved and lost.  Find ways to create a positive memorial that brings honor and is uplifting to their memory.  Really think on this and even talk to other family members to come up with ideas and then work to implement it.  Crying is okay, but be sure to reach out for support from others.  Be willing to allow others to be with you and offer support to you during the difficult times.  Be sure to take special care of yourself and do some things that make you feel good (i.e. take a weekend getaway, sit by the water and find the beauty of nature, take a spa day, etc...). 

One of the ways you can take special care of yourself especially during this time is to get connected with a therapist who can support you during your grief, guide you as you work through it and help process the issues around guilt.  There's not always a quick and easy answer for how to move on but again, it is possible, and maybe therapy is the first place to get you moving in the direction you want to go.