How can I be sure that revealing and digging up the past can help me?

This is a very common question regarding therapy, the idea that looking at the past and experiences that have caused us pain can help us to move forward with life seems counterintuitive.

However this is an important step in the process, when looking at the pains you speak of it takes away the power they have over our everyday lives. In therapy we don't just look at the context of these past experiences but their impact; we try to understand how and why each event has affected us and by creating this awareness of ourselves we are able to allow these events to become part of us rather than a defining characteristic.

To put this in more visual terms, I often describe the therapeutic process as a shelf with far too many boxes of items, in this case the shelf is almost at breaking point. The therapy acts on two fronts, firstly we try to organize the boxes putting similar items together and making things clearer and more accessible, then we strengthen the supports on the shelf.

Therapy in a more general sense can help by providing a space for you to explore your thoughts, feeling and behaviors where you will not be judged, this is not often an experience many people have in their day to day lives and by using the space that therapy provides you can begin to identify, understand and accept your past and move toward the future you envision. Therapy is not about fixing you because a person is not broken, it is about adjusting how and what we focus on, and teaching ourselves new skills to cope with our struggles. It is about helping you to develop the skills and resources to deal with the positive and negative parts of life.

Overall the therapy process is about providing you a safe place filled with compassion for you to open up and explore who you are and who you want to be without restrictions. In doing this you can accept your past as just that, the past, not a defining characteristic of who you are.

I hope my answer has helped you to understand how and why therapy can help.