How can I live my life without being judged?

Hello PM,

Thank you for your question. First, I want to say that I am sorry that you feel so judged by your family; no one should have to face rejection from those that are supposed to care about you. To answer your question about how to live your life without being judged; unfortunately, that would require control over other people. People are unfortunately capable of judging you for any number of reasons on any number of things. I only hope that that judgement does not discourage you from being yourself.

Know that those who would judge you do not know what they are missing out on. Remind yourself that their judgements are their own issues; that you are doing nothing wrong. You aren't somehow flawed. Try not to internalize the words spoken or actions taken. Remember you deserve better.

Not only should you remind yourself what is true, but you should make healthy boundaries around people who do not treat you well. If people, even your parents, aren't treating you well then you do not have to tolerate it and you deserve better. If they can not respect you then you reserve the right to limit contact or not have contact at all with those individuals. There will be others in your life who will accept you for you and will be healthy and supportive.

I know that is not easy, specifically the thought of needing to cut ties with a parent, but know that you deserve to be treated well. If it gets hard enforcing boundaries or the grief of that rejection gets to be too much know that there are counselors who are trained to help you process those emotions. You do not have to go through this alone and talking with a counselor can help you make sense of everything you are feeling as you transition to being open about your sexuality. 

Again, I thank you for your question. I hope that you are able to find some peace regarding the reactions you have faced. You are not alone and there is support if needed. Take care.