Ask a therapist > Other > How do I get over trauma responses and body focused repetitive behaviors, such as hair pulling?

How do I get over trauma responses and body focused repetitive behaviors, such as hair pulling?

I’ve always been the type of person to cry at any sign of disagreement or confrontation. I’m constantly monitoring and assessing other people's behavior for slight changes and I dislike not being able to handle those situations without feeling like a child. This fixation on my actions and how they affect the people around me often leads to me pulling my hair out which is something I want to stop.
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Asked by Jade
Other
Answered
11/11/2022

Hello Jade,

Thank you for your question. It certainly sounds like you are experiencing some trauma related symptoms such as hypervigillence and other symptoms. Even the hair pulling seems to be a direct result as it is being utilized as a coping strategy for the distress that the trauma responses are having on you. Trauma can certainly be worked through and the effects of that trauma can be overcome.

I strongly encourage you to not try and go this process alone. Working through traumatic material can potentially be retraumatizing. A therapist would be able to help you work through the material in a way that is not retraumatizing and damaging. You are going to want to work though the material in a titrated and controlled way.

Now, to get to your question of how can you cope; there are all sorts of coping strategies and skills to help alleviate the trauma symptoms you are experiencing such as breathing techniques, meditation, progressive muscle relaxation, grounding using your senses, etc. The goal is to remind your brain that it isn't happening in the here and now; that you are just remembering. That there is not current evidence that the people in your life now will hurt you, etc.

Coping is about using healthy distractions and relaxation techniques to alleviate the symptoms of trauma. However, ultimately overcoming trauma only comes by learning to challenge the thoughts contributing to what you are feeling and the beliefs those thoughts have formed as a result.
 
A therapist on the BetterHelp platform or one you find locally through your insurance or community can help you to recognize they ways in which your thoughts and internalized beliefs are contributing to the symptoms you are feeling and can teach you strategies to challenge or reframe any distorted and unhelpful thoughts. 
 
Try to remind yourself that you are okay and that it is just a feeling. You can do this! Again, thank you for your question. I truly hope that you are able to find some resolution to the intense symptoms you are experiencing. Take care! I wish you the best.
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