What To Do When Therapy Makes Things Worse?

By design, therapy should not make things worse but make them better. However, sometimes this is not the case and individuals can experience situations getting worse instead of better. Luckily, this is extremely rare and not the norm but the exception.

Chances are that if things are getting worse, it is happening for a variety of reasons. The most common reason is that the client is making positive changes in their life and the people surrounding them are not pleased with those changes. Not everyone will be as excited about positive changes happening with the client, some people will become angry, harsh, or display an uptick in negative behaviors in reaction to the positive changes. The reason why is that the relationship dynamic this changing and the other person may not be able to react in the same fashion that they are accustomed to. The client may be developing and enforcing boundaries that others do not like because they cannot get away with what they're used to getting away with. Usually, this will last for a certain period of time but not forever. The other party will start to accept the boundaries and positive changes and either moves forward or change their behaviors.

Another reason therapy can feel worse is when there is a conflict of personalities between the client and the therapist. This does happen and can cause therapy sessions to feel torturous. While this may not directly make situations worse, the stress and frustration can create a sense of unproductiveness in which nothing is being accomplished, hence, the situation that brought the client to therapy is not being resolved and may actually be getting worse. The easy fix to this scenario is to break up with the therapist and start looking for a new one. Interview the new potential therapists to make sure you are both on the same page with what you want to get out of therapy.

While therapy is there to make life clearer and potentially easier, there are times when things can feel like they are worse than before you started. Don’t ignore the feeling, take it seriously and start looking for the cause. You are definitely worth it.