I do not know what to do with my thoughts and laziness or procrastination?

I have become so lazy, I push myself so hard but I can not get through the day. I feel worthless, talentless, dumb person. I overthink a lot. I over use mobile to keep me away from my thoughts. I am clueless, while friends are following their passion or doing something useful.
Asked by anonymous
Answered
12/05/2021

Hey there! I appreciate you sending in a question. I know how difficult it can be to want to do so many things and then have a lack of motivation to get those things done. First, the best thing you can do is to understand the reasons why you are procrastinating before you can begin to tackle it. For instance, are you avoiding a particular task because you find it boring or unpleasant or maybe mecca is having a fit? If so, take steps to get it out of the way quickly, so that you can focus on the aspects of your job that you find more enjoyable or get mecca settled before starting the task.

Commit to the task. Focus on doing, not avoiding. Write down the tasks that you need to complete, and specify a time for doing them. This will help you to proactively tackle your work. Promise yourself a reward. If you complete a difficult task on time, reward yourself with a treat, such as a slice of cake or a coffee from your favorite coffee shop. And make sure you notice how good it feels to finish things! Ask someone to check up on you. Peer pressure works! This is the principle behind self-help groups. If you don't have anyone to ask, an online tool such as Procraster can help you to self-monitor. Act as you go. Tackle tasks as soon as they arise, rather than letting them build up over another day. Rephrase your internal dialog. The phrases "need to" and "have to," for example, imply that you have no choice in what you do. This can make you feel disempowered and might even result in self-sabotage. However, saying, "I choose to," implies that you own a project, and can make you feel more in control of your workload. Minimize distractions. Turn off your email and social media and avoid sitting anywhere near a television while you work. Get rid of catastrophizing. One of the biggest reasons people procrastinate is because they catastrophize or make a huge deal out of something. It may be related to how tough, how boring, or how painful it will be to complete the task; whatever the case, the underlying theme is that doing the task will be "unbearable. “In reality, challenges, boredom, and hard work will not kill you-or even make you sick. Procrastination, on the other hand, is associated with stress-think of the stress you feel when you avoid making a phone call you know you need to make. So keep things in perspective: "Sure, this is not my favorite task, but I can get through it." 

Remember to make your goals manageable Setting unrealistic goals and taking on too much can lead to a serious burnout. A burnout can cause exhaustion, lack of interest, less motivation, and a longing to escape. Avoid overloading by setting smaller, attainable goals that will get you where you want to be without overwhelming you along the way. Negative self talk can derail your efforts to get things done in every aspect of your life. Telling yourself that you’re a lazy person is a form of negative self-talk. You can stop your negative internal voice by practicing positive self-talk. Instead of saying, “There’s no way I can get this done,” say, “I’ll give it my all to make it happen.” Take a moment to think about what your strengths, and use positive affirmations to start your day or even a task. Try to apply them to different aspects of a task to help you get things done. Feeling positive can lead to engaging in following up goals and finishing tasks.  

Lastly, remember to recognize your accomplishments along the way. Celebrate yourself and the little things. Pat yourself on the back for a job well done can help motivate you to keep going. Consider writing down all of your accomplishments along the way in everything you do, whether at work or home. It’s a great way to boost your confidence and positivity, and fuel you to carry on.

 

I hope this helps! 

 

Best Regards, 

Tahreer Ahmad, LPC

(LPC, NCC, THTC)