How can I move on from a relationship I don’t see growing and meeting my needs.

Princess,

Hello, it is very nice to meet you! Thank you for your question, I hope that you will find this helpful. You face a difficult decision, in that your partner has positive qualities, such as being supportive of your children and spending time with you. But, there is a lot missing for you. It sounds like you have already made your decision, but hesitate to take that next step. The relationship is okay right now, but you do not feel fulfilled or that there is room for growth and a future with him. 

If you and I were working together in therapy, I would want to know more about what is presently keeping you with him. It may be that you simply don't want to deal with the disruption in your life with a breakup at this time. That's okay! Ask yourself, what is keeping you in the relationship right now? Some things to consider: you do not owe him anything, nor should you feel guilty for having the feelings that you do. If you were to tell me that you were not completely certain of your decision, I might suggest couples counseling with him to discuss and address your concerns. However, if you have already made up your mind, that would not be productive. 

I would encourage you to be open and honest with him about how you are feeling. Try to use "I statements". Instead of saying to him, "you do this, you do that, etc..." I would instead say, "I feel that this is not working, I feel unfulfilled, I feel that we are not a good fit and I do not want to continue with this relationship any longer, etc..." 

He will likely try to talk you out of it, perhaps try to make you feel bad or feel guilty. Yes, a break up will be upsetting for everyone involved, including your children. But, they will be okay. However, the longer you continue on like this, the more difficult it will become to break up. 

Your children will likely be sad and grieve the loss of him in their lives. Be there for them, let them talk about it with you. Depending on how things played out with your divorce, if your current partner has become a father figure for them, would you consider keeping him in their lives? Ultimately, that decision is up to you. 

I hope that you have found this information helpful and I will you all the best in your journey. You might also find speaking with a therapist helpful with navigating through this.