How can set healthy boundaries and engage meaningfully with people around me?

There are many ways to set healthy boundaries so that we are able to engage with others in a meaningful way.  We do this so that we, and those we have relationships with can take responsibilty for their own actions, feel safe, have trust and honesty, be able to support, cooperate and communicate with each other. 

Setting these boundaries gives us the chance to share what is important to us so that others are able to understand. For example if we wanted to set a boundary about taking responsibility this may be about owning up to mistakes and being able to discuss them. For safety this may be about setting a boundary that we respect each others' space and speak to each other without aggression. For trust and honesty this may be about being open and truthful about what we need and how we are feeling and for support, cooperation and communication, this may be about being able to listen to others without judgement and expecting the same from them, making decisions together and being willing to compromise and accept that change may need to happen. 

An example of setting a boundary to avoid getting too attached to someone, might include asking for your own time and and space and respecting that the other person needs this too, or using open communication to share how you are feeling regarding the attachment and making a decision together about what could be helpful moving forward. 

It may be helpful to plan what you want to say before communicating any healthy boundary, considering why you need it and why it is important to you, so that you are able to share this. Using I statements when you set these boundaries may also be helpful, such as 'I feel that I become too attached to others and I feel that due to this it would be helpful for us to have our own time and space.'   Allowing yourself this space may also help you to feel less drained in relationships and the space to reflecting on the fear of letting go and hurting others.