How can you overcome micro cheating for the fourth time and build trust + spark in the relationship?

This is certainly a tough situation. If I could ask you some questions I would ask, what has led to your boyfriend cheating multiple times? It seems to me that this is a pattern or a behavior that he is engaging in rather than a one time slip up. Is he cheating with multiple people or does he continuously go back to the same person? Depending on whether or not it is the same person or multiple people, may give you some information as to where your relationship with him is headed.

Another question I would ask you, is what makes you continue to stay with him? It is completely fine that you have chosen to stay with him, it is more that I would want to identify what are the things about him that you really like that are enough for you stay with him.

Another question I would ask is what is his behavior like after he gets caught or confesses to cheating? Is it the same type of behavior each time? If so, then he needs some help to break this pattern. He probably needs to do his own therapy to break this pattern of cheating.

Regaining trust with him may be hard but it is doable. I think the first thing is that he needs to stop cheating. Second, remind yourself that forgiving a person for what they have done and choosing to stay with them, means that you are choosing to move on from the thing that they did. So you will have to continuously remind yourself that you are choosing to move on, and remind yourself of the things that he is doing to gain your trust now. Accept the positive things that he is doing to build trust with you. Accept the positive things that he is doing to make you feel loved. Accept the positive things that he is doing to build romance with you. When he initiates these things, give him a chance by letting him in. That shows that you have forgiven him and you are choosing to move on from the situation. Now if he isn't doing anything to help build trust, romance, or love then I think you need to have a conversation with him regarding what you need from him. Be clear and specific as to the things that you want to see in your relationship moving on. It's not a punishment towards him, but rather you are identifying things that you think will enhance your relationship with him.

Also, give him a chance to identify things that he needs from you and the things that he thinks will enhance the relationship that you guys have. Maybe he keeps cheating because he feels something is missing in the relationship you guys have? Try asking him and see what he says he wants and needs. To build trust and rebuild a relationship is going to take effort on both of your parts equally. It is not up to just one person in the relationship. You also may want to consider trying couple's therapy. This way you can both receive specific strategies to build trust and enhance the relationship with each other.