How do I control my feelings when I see my husband talking to another woman?

I would suggest finding ways to address potential feelings of loss, abandonment, anger, grief, and rejection. I also recommend thinking about potential boundaries that could be put into place and effective positive conflict communication with him about your boundary needs through this difficult time.

It could also be helpful to take some time for self discovery to see if it might be too much to stay in the same environment right now or if placing boundaries could give you what you need to continue working there.

I would also suggest not taking on his response of "giving you back your freedom so you can be happy without him" as this sounds like projection and sounds like his feelings not yours.

I would also suggest looking up the self care wheel to see where you can implement things to aid in taking care of yourself to be able to handle the situation you're in at a healthier level as now is a great time to figure out what your thoughts/feelings/needs are and how to get them addressed and validated. 

There is a fantastic workbook on Amazon called The Set Boundaries Workbook by Nedra Glover Tawwab that is absolutely amazing and hits so many things that could be beneficial for you especially given the situation. It's not very long and it isn't tedious. 

You might also want to get the emotions or feelings wheel to break down all that you are really going through as there's more than just anger and sadness and this could help when trying to heal and when trying to express your feelings and boundaries to others.

We've been taught that taking care of ourselves or out needs is selfish but it's the total opposite because we can't be the best versions of ourselves without taking care of us and we can't pour from an empty cup.

Maybe look into taking some PTO or speaking with someone who isn't a friend or family member to get through this time and not feeling alone in all of it could be helpful.

I hope that this helps and if you have any other questions I would be glad to answer them to the best of my abilities.

Thank you.

Amanda Emerson, LCSW