How do I cope with a breakup?

Hi NaeNae! I am so glad that you reached out for some help! This sounds like a hurtful situation that is difficult to navigate on your own. Sometimes our emotions get in the way of us figure out and decide what is best for us. Try looking at it from a perspective that does not include your strong emotions-just the facts! What is it that is making you unhappy? Maybe the feelings of not being appreciated enough? Or possibly him not showing emotions? Is this something the two of you can work through together? It's okay if that is not what you want, moving on is okay too! Either decision is a difficult one to make, but always keep in mind that each decision will lead you down a different path. There is no right or wrong path in this situation, just two different ones that can both have beautiful outcomes. 

Focus on what will make you happy. When coping with a break up it is important that we focus on what is happening in the moment, not in the past. What is wonderful about your life in this moment? For the next five minutes focus on, where can you find joy, peace or whatever else you need to be content. Then do that again until you get through an entire day of being in the moment. Some moments won't be so easy and that's okay too. Let yourself feel those feelings and then let them pass and go back to taking baby steps at staying in the moment. 

It's also okay to look to the future. What are your goals and dreams? What are you doing in this moment to accomplish them? If you aren't working on anything specific right now, that's okay too. It sounds like one of your goals is getting through this break-up. What do you see yourself doing when you are feeling like yourself again? Once your emotions have calmed down a little bit, start thinking about your next steps. Not before you are ready though! It's okay to take as much time as you need to get through this challenge! 

When you lose someone you love in any manner, whether through a break-up or death or something else, it is normal to grieve that. Grief is not only for death. Any loss can be grieved. The stages of grief are denial, anger, bargaining, depression and then acceptance. These stages are not linear, one day you might feel like you have reached the acceptance stage and then all of the sudden you are back to anger and denial. This is normal and okay. Over time you will find that you are in the acceptance stage for longer and longer. Sometimes, a break-up can be even more challenging to grieve than death because there is not always the finality that comes with death. The possibility and hope of being with that person again can come back up. This is where your boundaries come in! Set boundaries that let you think about this person in the same manner all the time and this process will go more smoothly. 

Good Luck NaeNae! I wish you and your daughter the best!