How do I keep myself motivated everyday? I struggle with depression and it comes off and on

It is important to recognize your strengths and resources to become motivated. What are things you do well that make you feel good? What is one thing you like about yourself and other people who have noticed as well? Also, is there at least one person you can turn to who can lift you up with an encouraging word or positive message? Knowing what you do well, knowing what you like about yourself, and having the support of someone are key variables to help you stay motivated and face challenges. Think about what you want when you are feeling motivated. What changes do you want to make? You have the power to make those changes. 

 

With regard to your relationship, have you thought about finding an outside hobby or interest to improve your mood? Think about your interests and spend time outside the relationship to do what makes you feel good about yourself. This will improve your self-esteem and lead to you feeling worthy to be loved by yourself and others. 

 

Also, communication plays a major role in building and sustaining relationships. Think about your communication style. Do you think it is assertive, aggressive, or passive? I challenge you to reflect on which communication style you have. 

 

The assertive style of communication is where both individuals show respect to each other by using I statements. Using I statements allows each individual to share their feelings and what it is that they want. For example, I feel rejected when you don't show me attention, I want you to spend more time cuddling with me. Another example, I feel unappreciated when I do things around the house to make it it our home and you don't acknowledge those things. I want you to tell me that you appreciate me. I encourage you to work on being assertive and using “I” statements to communicate better with your partner. 

 

If I am the therapist you select then we will discuss the elements mentioned in my response to help you become more motivated and less depressed, and take steps toward making your relationship more fulfilling.