How do i make things work out in my life?

Hello, thank you for asking, taking the first step is always difficult and you have by asking this question. it sounds like you have a lot going on right now and it is overwhelming you. It feels as though breaking this down further into more manageable sizes would be beneficial. 

The first thing I would say is that trust is a big thing in relationships and can mean a reliance on other people to support or do something for you, whether that be emotionally or physically. The way we develop trust for others is linked back to the attachments we have during childhood and often the relationship we have with our caregivers. If we have had relationships as a child where we have been mistreated, lied to, or let down, we can mistrust those around us, especially if this has happened with someone we care about who is meant to care about us too. This can also have a knock-on effect on our future relationships.

When we look at the trust wound, in adulthood, it can dictate the way we feel about ourselves and others and can often present in external behaviors, such as not feeling in control, not trusting ourselves, feeling afraid of being hurt, and often not feeling safe. All of this combined can often lead to low mood and anxiety. People who suffer from trust wounds can often isolate themselves and have self-doubt meaning this can have a knock-on effect on their communication and feeling as though they won't be liked in return or feel as though what they have to say isn't valid, or they may be ridiculed. 

There are ways to work with the inner child, and it is often looking at the needs that weren't met in childhood and now adulthood and looking at how you can give both the inner child and yourself now, the things needed to feel safe in every area of your life. This may include building self-esteem, looking at a timeline of your past to the present day, using exposure and response work to help build confidence and gathering evidence of your own abilities, looking at thought-challenging and exploring if your current relationships meet your needs and finding healthy ways to communicate your boundaries and expectations.

All of this might sound overwhelming, but it is broken down into chunks and prioritized in the way you want it to be, during counseling sessions you will be heard, and your thoughts are welcomed, during your sessions your counselor will help to create a safe environment where you can open up freely and at your own pace.  Working on these issues does involve work, but you will have support throughout the process. During the process, you might be asked to do tasks around self-care too.  I hope that you are able to find the support you need to help you on your journey, please remember you are worth the work!