How do I set boundaries and not feel bad about setting them

Setting Boundaries can feel uncomfortable, even if setting them is necessary. Setting Boundaries can cause conflict when the involved parties have differing values. When this is the case, it can lead to conflict and make the person setting the boundaries feel uneasy. This uneasiness is not uncommon. 

Sometimes the uneasiness is caused due to an internal conflict between how you want to be treated and your love for others. Sometimes the uneasiness is caused because we want the other person to accept and like our boundaries and it may not feel good when they don't like the boundaries.

Feeling at ease when it comes to setting boundaries may be something that happens over time as the boundary setter grows strength in their journey of self discovery. Setting boundaries may begin to feel easier once the boundary setter begins to see the results of others respecting the boundaries that they have set. Essentially, not feeling bad over setting boundaries may take time as a person grows on their journey of self discovery. 

Another thing that you may want to consider is getting to the root of why you feel bad about it. Do you feel bad because you want the person to agree? Do you feel bad because you don't like confrontation? Getting to the root of the feeling is important in order to resolve the feeling. 

I would also encourage you to focus on self care as you explore setting boundaries; even if this means seeking help in a therapeutic setting. Additionally, focusing on self care and self development will help you feel more confident in boundary setting. This may include reading books or articles in areas that you'd like to grow in. Self care may include leisure or social activities that bring you contentment. Self care may involve finding like minded people to surround yourself with. Often, people grow in personal strength when they have a community of support. 

I wish you well on your journey and I hope that you find this feedback helpful. Remember that boundary setting is about self value. Boundary setting may not be easy, but is always necessary.