How to stop thinking others are hurting my marriage

Hi, I am wondering what the threat is that you feel, is it a threat that someone else will come along and that you will lose your partner because they will prefer that other person?

You say you have always had this issue in relationships, and I am sensing this is because of a lack of trust in your relationships.

You ask the question WHY do you have this and how can you remove this problem from your relationship. I sense here it is best to ask yourself this question, and look at why you feel threatened.

Do you have a low self worth? Do you feel not good enough?

Building on your self esteem and self worth, can help you see what you bring to your relationship and how important you are to your partner.

Also looking at making your own happiness, and being comfortable knowing who you are, your values, your likes, your dislikes can help you see your worth.

I am wondering here if there is codependency in your relationship which may in turn be causing you some resentment.

Without knowing more about you and what is going on in your relationship, makes it difficult to answer your question.

Sometimes this threat comes from being let down in previous relationships, and not being able to let go and accept that this is a new relationship.

Other times we can feel threatened in our relationship, because we have been unfaithful and broken trust so feel its only fair someone will treat us in the same way.

Without knowing all the facts it is difficult to answer your question, but my gut feeling here is that your self worth and belief that you are all someone needs is stopping you from trusting your partner.

That sense that someone else is more deserving of happiness than you are, is stopping you from believing that things can be good for you.

This low self concept can come from different experiences in life. It can come from conditions of worth placed on us as children. " I must act in a specific way to be loved" for example "I must be quiet at all times and not disrupt my parents evening to be a good girl and be loved"

I feel if you engage in therapy then it may help you look at your worth and build on a low self esteem and help you accept who you are!