I need help with regards to speaking up when it comes to my relationship

Hi there! I wanted to encourage you for reaching out for support through BetterHelp. It takes a lot of courage and strength to ask for help, and you should be proud of yourself for doing so. I wanted to also preface this by saying I am answering this question based on the information you have provided. If we were meeting for a therapy session, I would want to ask follow-up questions to gather more information and gain clarification. However, since I am only given the information you have provided, I apologize if I have misunderstood anything. 

First of all, I am sure it has been a big step to move your romantic relationship forward into new territory. That can be scary and exciting (and all of the emotions that can come up!). I can assume that there have been things you like about this person to be able to move into relationship territory (and vice versa). I would definitely want to know what things are concerning you and why you are having trouble opening up to him? Maybe that is something to write about and kind of explore on your own. But, I would say that being honest with him could help you feel better overall about the relationship. Communication can certainly be tough, especially in romantic relationships. I would maybe try to write down what you would want to say, and then maybe even practice how you would want to deliver that. You could maybe even read it out to him if you are nervous about being able to talk about it. I would recommend using "I-Statements", which is a form of communication that helps with being able to express your feelings while also hopefully lessening defensiveness from the other person. It could look something like this: "I feel _______ when you __________, because ____________". This can help promote healthy communication in the relationship.

I can understand the anxiety attacks have probably been very hard to deal with too. I would want to know when those started and if there are any triggers for the anxiety attacks? There are many different coping skills that can help with anxiety and anxiety attacks. I would recommend trying to remove yourself from the situation if you are feeling anxious (and if it is possible to do so). Try to take some deep breaths and sit down with your feet on the ground - this can signal to your brain that you are grounded and safe. Try to quickly name off what you can see, hear, taste, smell, and touch. This is a grounding and calming technique that involves the five senses and that can help ground you back to the present, as well. Maybe you could even put on a meditation from an app or YouTube, or listen to some calming music. Try to utilize those coping skills if you are feeling anxious or having an anxiety attack. I would also recommend considering therapy and/or seeing a psychiatrist to discuss these anxiety attacks further and be evaluated further. Also, try to reach out to your support system when possible to be able to talk it out. Sometimes getting to just vent through it can be helpful.

I want to thank you again for reaching out for support, and I hope this was helpful. I wish you the best on your journey :)