What is marriage really like?

Marriage is something that looks different in every couple and every culture.  It can be such a mystery for people who are single to know what marriage is really like.  Marriage is the most basic form is of long-term commitment.  In general, whenever we are committed to something long-term, there will naturally be some peaks and valleys.  For example, if I am committed to a career, there will be peaks and valleys in that career.  Accepting this reality with marriage is really important because leaving the commitment can be appealing in some of the valleys. This is a value to marriage that is included in most marital vows because it is that important. 

Marriage is a relationship that involves a friendship and a romantic partnership.  Both of those parts of marriage will fluctuate.  There will be moments where both will be going well, but there will also be moments where either of them might not go so well.  Most married couples will say that the friendship component of marriage is what carries them through.  That is likely due to when the partnership component is not going well, just like each other in general can be really powerful.  Marriage can be such a beautiful thing that you get to experience life and the many stages it comes with side by side with your closest friend. 

Marriage can become somewhat of an achievement for some people, and the pride that comes with that achievement can help sustain some couples.  The commitment and history can become powerful enough to help them grow through the difficult valleys.  In the valleys, couples will need to re-engage and connect.  There will naturally be changes throughout marriage because human beings change as life goes on.  If a couple can continue to reconnect, though, in those moments of change, there can be so much growth and satisfaction that comes with that.  Those kinds of moments can add to more and more confidence that marriage will sustain the valleys even though they are really difficult.