Why don’t I deserve the right guy
First, let's start by reframing your question. It should read, "I haven't found the right guy that deserves me". You will find what you need and will get what you want. The biggest thing is that you are working on bettering yourself so when you better yourself, that doesn't always mean that everyone else is working on themselves. Therefore, their energy can be toxic and it is nothing you should settle for. I think the biggest question you need to ask yourself is do you love yourself? Are you able to recognize and appreciate the love you have around you or are you always comparing yourself to others? Because comparison is the death of joy. Can you just enjoy exploring who you are and the people that you meet? What type of guy are you hoping to attract? Also, why do you feel alone? Often we feel alone, undervalued, and not loved because we aren't happy with who we are. I would explore more about you, who are you outside of roles and titles. The other thing to consider is where are you looking to attract the person that you want to be with. Energy is important. If you are thinking and feeling negative then negative things will come. However, the more optimistic you are about your situation the better your outcomes. You have to change your mindset and have patience with yourself and with the universe. Your person is out there, you two just haven't discovered each other yet. So please don't harbor any anger, jealously, or envy because that blocks people from seeing the true you. Lastly, wait! Sometimes we get so consumed in looking that we don't enjoy the time of just sitting still and loving ourselves. The more you love you the better you will be able to tell the other person how to love you. Show yourself some grace! People come into our lives for reasons and seasons. Start to outline what you have learned from these past relationships. Do you have a dating pattern? With each one what did you learn about yourself? Also, ask yourself why are you so uncomfortable with rejection?