How can you get past any situation in life and regain self-control and respect in the process?

Hello and thank you for asking the question.

How you get past situations in life with self-control and respect is by establishing healthy boundaries with others. Self-control and self-respect starts with you first showing yourself those things and secondly requiring those from people you encounter. No one is able to give you self-respect, and is therefore unable to take it from you. How you treat yourself is the best way to show others the standard in which to treat you. When you establish boundaries with others you honor yourself and give others the opportunity to do the same. We often ask people to treat us in a way that we aren't treating ourselves. Learning to have boundaries in place and also learning how to enforce them is an empowering way to live with others and love ourselves. The reason most of us do not have boundaries within our relationships is because we don't want to have hard conversations. Telling someone that what they are doing or saying is hurtful, frustrating, or disrespectful is hard to do. We avoid the conversation and suffer in silence until a few things happen. We can "explode" and become angry and lash out or we cut off the relationship altogether. Both of these actions can be avoided by being vulnerable and willing to communicate our wants and needs and allowing the other person an opportunity to make a choice.

This takes practice and patience not only with the other person but with you as well. It will take time to get used to doing things differently even if it is for the better. Change is not always an easy thing to implement but with support and effort it is possible. Being gentle in the way that you talk to yourself and giving yourself grace through these encounters is the best thing you can do. We are creatures of habit and most of us are non-confrontational so it will be important to change your mindset around what it means to set boundaries. Boundaries are meant to promote self-love, preserve relationships and be enforceable. The way you think about yourself will empower you to become assertive, strong, vulnerable and courageous.