How do I shut my pride down?

Hi!
First of all, I think that being able to ask this question and put it into words already is a great start to figuring out who you are, and why we as humans do things at times that feel out of our control. Even the process of noticing and catching these patterns are the first steps in gaining insight and awareness to make changes in our lives. I would want to explore some things with you if we worked together. One being exploring the values of "being interesting", "being important", and "knowing things"...I would be curious what these values mean to you, and how they rank in your overall list of values. The reason I'd want to explore that is to peel back some layers about where these values come from (parents, family, cultural expectations) and whether or not they align with your personal values.

Second, I'd want to explore your relationship with yourself. It's cliche. It is so cliche - the whole idea of "loving yourself"...however I'd be curious about what you find important and interesting about yourself, aside from the social perceptions or what you think others may think of you. Who are YOU and does comparing yourself to others suddenly take away from who you are?

I'd also like to explore with you the idea of "going towards what you know". Especially as adults, we are all creatures of habits and patterns. Especially in relationships. Habits and patterns from early childhood often set the framework for how we interact with the world as adults. I would be curious when you think back to early caregiver relationships, were there people in your life who made you feel this way? Unimportant, uninteresting, perhaps lesser than? By being able to identify past relational patterns, we can then rewrite some of those narratives about your sense of self, and your sense of self as if relates to others in intimate relationships.

I would also be curious about what you believe your partner would say about you and how this dynamic plays out in relationships that you attract? This was an umbrella exploration of things we might explore together in order to peel back some layers as to the core of your behaviors.

To answer you questions in short, there is a part of you that is acting similar to a pattern that was embedded in you at an early age and we can undo these patterns by creating new patterns of behavior and challenging your initial core beliefs about you.