"I love you, Daddy": Creative ways to express love for your father

Fathers can have an important impact and influence on a child’s growth and development. Even as adults, our fathers may still play a significant role in our lives. However, many people find it difficult to express love for their fathers. When saying “I love you, Dad,” is not enough, you may want to find a unique way to show how much you care and appreciate him. Read on to discover creative ways to express love for your father. 

The importance of a father’s role

According to a recent study, fathers play a significant role in a child’s executive function development, or higher level thinking skills (i.e., working memory, inhibition, mental flexibility). This contribution to a child’s cognitive development allows them to follow through with goal-directed behaviors in an organized and timely fashion. Fathers also can contribute to their children’s future success in school or in the workplace. According to the US Department of Health and Human Services, fathers reading to their kids and telling them stories can boost cognitive development, academic skill, and future opportunities.  Fathers often teach us much about life through childhood, adolescence, and into adulthood. Your father may have taught you to ride a bike, fix a car, take responsibility when you make a mistake, or countless other lessons. 

If your father has played an essential role in your life to this point, you may want to find a way to express your love and gratitude for everything he’s done for you. A 2022 study showed that the paternal role could significantly impact the family dynamic and create positive results for the health outcomes of mother and child. 

It is important to note that every family dynamic does not look the same. Some people do not have a father figure in their lives. They may have a mother who plays both parental roles or a family with two fathers, two mothers, or another type of guardian. 

Creative ways to express love for your dad

Sometimes, saying “I love you, Dad” does not feel like enough to convey the depth of the love you feel for your father. In such a situation, having practical ways to show your love and appreciation can be helpful. 

Ask him questions and for advice

Your father likely has a wealth of interesting stories and valuable advice to share. Ask your dad to tell you about his childhood, what his first job was like, or any of his experiences as a young man that he is open to share with you. Hearing stories from a time before you were born can help you gain a deeper insight into your father’s life and behaviors. 

Many fathers enjoy being needed. Ask your dad for advice and let him share his knowledge and experience with you. Not only are you likely to get valuable information, but your father will also feel respected and needed. If the advice yields exceptionally positive results, remember to call him afterward and tell him how grateful you are for the help. 

Lessons people often learn from their fathers

As we grow into adults, our fathers often are by our side giving advice and teaching us lessons that last for a lifetime. Here are some examples of lessons passed on from fathers:

• Prepare to turn any situation into a learning opportunity. 
• Value friends and family—and make time for both.
• Hard work can have incredible value, and the things you work for often mean more.
• Whatever you do, give it your best effort.

Take advantage of the time you have with him

We have a limited amount of time with our fathers, and many people who have lost their dads strongly advise taking advantage of the time you have with them. Make an effort to maintain regular contact with your father. Try to find events he may be interested in and invite him to go together. It may help him see his importance to you and can be an excellent way to show your love. Another bonus to spending time with your father is it often creates incredible memories for both of you. A 2020 study showed a positive link between time spent with a father during childhood and a reduction in adolescent behavior problems. This connection does not have to subside just because we are fully grown. Even when you live far away from your father, know you can still call or video conference to spend time with him. 

Carry on his traditions with respect

“I’m very inspired by him—it was my father who taught us that an immigrant must work twice as hard as anybody else, that he must never give up.” – Zinedine Zidane

If your father has family or cultural traditions that matter to him, learn everything you can about them and carry them on through your life, passing them down to your own children. From the customs of your cultural heritage to insisting on making breakfast before opening Christmas presents, continuing your father’s traditions can help you feel closer to him. Refresh old childhood memories and create new ones by keeping your father’s traditions alive. 

Cook his favorite meal

There is a special kind of power in a delicious meal cooked with love. If you do not know your dad’s favorite meal, ask him. If it’s something he enjoys making, ask him to cook it with you. Then, invite him over for dinner one night and present him with his favorite meal. This thoughtful gesture should show your love, and he is sure to appreciate your efforts. 

A 2014 study examines the role of food offerings and their effect on close relationships. This study explores the positive effects of sharing meals on the development of a child’s ability to emotionally control and self-soothe. Whether you father worked hard to help pay for food on the table or prepared it, the nourishment provided by him helped you learn empathy and self-soothing behaviors. In feeding your father, you reflect the love he modeled through sharing food together.

Take photos together and make an album

Photos can be an excellent way to capture a moment in time so that you can revisit it later. A 2014 study indicates that autobiographical memories, such as those recorded with photos, can bring feelings of happiness and joy to the surface. Any moment you have together, take photos with your father and use them to create a photo album. It will be a heartfelt, touching gift that shows your love and will surely be one of your father’s most treasured possessions

Join him for ordinary errands

“My father didn’t tell me how to live. He lived, and let me watch him do it.” — Clarence Budington Kelland

If you have a few hours free, consider calling your dad and asking if you can tag along for his errands or help with any household projects he may be tackling. Keep him company through the typically tedious tasks and offer him an extra set of hands. The time together can help you bond. 

Read his favorite book or watch his favorite show

Ask for his recommendations and read his favorite book or watch his favorite show so you can discuss it together. If it is still releasing new episodes, try to watch it with your father once or twice a month. You can make your own book club or movie night tradition criticizing the plot and having a wonderful time. 

Write him a heartfelt letter

If you have difficulty verbally expressing your feelings, you may want to try writing your father a letter explaining how you feel. With a physical letter, he is likely to keep it and read it often, treasuring the tangible expression of your affection. He may also respond to you in writing, giving you both an opportunity to share a new bonding activity together that does not involve a screen. 

Why some people have trouble expressing love

People may have a difficult time expressing love for a multitude of reasons. Not being able to identify and and/or express emotions is called alexithymia, which is not a mental health condition. Whether you had tough times during childhood, bad experiences in relationships, or other traumatic experiences, shutting down emotional expression is a common reaction for many people. However, working with a licensed therapist can help you identify and overcome unresolved feelings, teach you practical coping skills to manage stressors, and build your communication skills so you can share your feelings. 

If you are experiencing trauma, support is available. Please see our Get Help Now page for more resources.

Grow with professional support and guidance

A qualified therapist can offer professional support and guidance as you build the emotional intelligence to recognize and understand your emotions. You can also develop your skills with emotional literacy, empowering you to express your feelings and needs effectively to important people in your life. 

How therapy can help you express love

Many people struggle to communicate their emotions successfully. If you have trouble telling others how you feel, consider speaking to a licensed therapist through an online therapy platform like BetterHelp. Virtual treatment is often less expensive and involves shorter wait times than therapy in the traditional setting. Flexible appointment formats make it easy to fit therapy into your busy schedule. Further, if you live remotely or face a long commute, the convenience of online therapy is more accessible option. 

Multiple studies performed by the American Psychological Association (APA) show that online therapy can be an affordable, accessible alternative to in-person treatments. Online therapy has been used to treat a vast array of mental health conditions and is frequently beneficial to others as well. According to the APA, internet-based therapy allows people who previously didn’t have access to receive treatment.