Depression Is Not Real: A Dangerous Mental Health Myth
If you have been diagnosed with a depressive disorder or believe you may be living with depression, it can be painful to hear that your parents and your family believe depression isn't real. Having an open and honest conversation with them about the symptoms you're experiencing may be helpful, but it can also lead to further invalidation.
Friends, support groups, and mental health professionals can provide a safe space to talk about your symptoms and your experience. In addition, you might consider working with a therapist to discuss your family's position on these matters and how to move forward. You're not alone, and depression is a real and serious mental illness, impacting over 280 million adults worldwide.
Why some families believe depression is not real
Many people may have a difficult time accepting that depression is a legitimate medical condition. These are often deeply held beliefs that may be related to cultural backgrounds, generational attitudes, and a lack of awareness about mental health in general. Unfortunately, these views can make it difficult for people with depression to get the help and support they need.
Cultural beliefs and stigma around mental illness
Stigma remains a significant barrier to understanding mental health and the idea that depression is a real condition. Many people may see mental illness as a sign of weakness, some type of spiritual failure, or something to be ashamed of. Cultural and religious beliefs can reinforce these ideas, along with the opinion that emotional struggles should be handled in private or even prayed away.
Some common stigma-driven beliefs families hold include:
- Mental illness is a character flaw.
- People who are depressed are being dramatic or seeking attention.
- Seeking therapy or medication is a sign of weakness.
- Emotional pain should be "pushed through" without outside support.
These attitudes may not come from a place of cruelty, but without an understanding of how depression affects the brain and body, families and loved ones can unknowingly cause harm.
Confusing sadness with clinical depression
Families may also dismiss depression symptoms due to confusing typical feelings of sadness with depression, a diagnosable mental health condition. Everyone can feel down sometimes, so recognizing when something more serious is happening can be challenging. However, there can be ways to distinguish between the two.
Depression differs from sadness because it can appear without any obvious cause and persist for weeks or months, while sadness is usually triggered by a specific event. People with depression often have symptoms that go beyond emotions, including physical symptoms like fatigue, sleep changes, and appetite changes. Depression is not the same as temporary unhappiness; it is a diagnosable mood disorder. Understanding this distinction can be the first step toward offering real support.
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Find your matchWhat depression actually is
The Anxiety and Depression Association of America (ADAA) explains that depression is characterized by having at least five out of nine common symptoms. Below are several of the symptoms that those with MDD may experience:
Symptoms of depression
- An overwhelming and pervasive sense of sadness that doesn't go away
- Feelings of worthlessness
- Difficulty with social interactions
- Fatigue
- Recurrent thoughts of suicidal ideation
- Lack of interest in previously enjoyed activities
- Pronounced increase or decrease in appetite
- Significant memory loss
- Difficulty concentrating
If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available. Text or call 988 or chat 988lifeline.org. Support is available 24/7. If you are experiencing trauma, support is available.
The science behind depression
To understand why depression is real, it can help to look at what the science says. Below, we look at what the research shows about depression and disruptions in brain chemistry, particularly in neurotransmitters like serotonin, dopamine, and norepinephrine, as well as other brain changes and contributing factors.
Brain chemistry and serotonin receptors
A well-established finding in depression research concerns the role of neurotransmitters, chemical messengers that transmit signals between brain cells. Serotonin, dopamine, and norepinephrine are three of the most studied. All three have been linked to elements that contribute to depression, including mood regulation, motivation, and emotional stability.
Serotonin has long been studied for its connection to depression. In people with depression, serotonin receptors may become less responsive over time, meaning the brain is less able to process and use the serotonin that is available.
This understanding of how the brain’s ability to process available serotonin is what led to the development of selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs), one of the most commonly prescribed classes of antidepressants. SSRIs work by increasing the availability of serotonin in the brain, which helps receptors function more effectively.
Brain structure, genetics, and vitamin deficiencies
While brain chemicals can play a role in depression, depression is not caused by a single factor. It can develop through a combination of factors that vary from person to person. Below, we take a closer look at some of these factors.
Brain structure can play a significant role in depression. Studies using brain imaging technology suggest that people with depression may have differences in the hippocampus, prefrontal cortex, and amygdala, the regions that are responsible for memory, decision-making, and emotional processing. Specifically, in people with depression:
- Hippocampus volume may be lower
- The prefrontal cortex may have reduced activity
- A hyperactive amygdala may contribute to depressive symptoms
Genetics may also contribute to depression risk. Research shows that depression runs in families, suggesting a hereditary component. For example, having a first-degree relative with depression increases your risk significantly.
Vitamin deficiencies are another overlooked factor. Some studies suggest that low levels of some vitamins, including B vitamins and vitamin D, may contribute to depression symptoms.
Causes and risk factors that families may overlook
Because depression can occur from a complex interaction of overlapping biological, medical, and situational factors, it can be difficult to consider all of the things that may play a role in the development of this mental illness.
Life circumstances
Life circumstances can play a role in the development of depression, but the impact of these circumstances is not always evident. For example, chronic illness, financial hardship, social isolation, and major changes in a person's life can all worsen or trigger multiple episodes.
Links to heart disease and other health conditions
Depression and physical health can be deeply connected. For example, research suggests a strong link between depression and heart disease. People living with other chronic conditions, like diabetes, cancer, or chronic pain, may be at a higher risk for depression, and some medical treatments may also increase depression risk. For example, certain medications may list depression as a known side effect.
How family disbelief affects people with depression
When families misunderstand depression or refuse to accept that depression is real, it can have substantial effects that go far beyond hurt feelings. For people with depression, a lack of support from family can make seeking help and achieving recovery significantly harder.
Feeling invalidated, ashamed, or guilty
Being told that depression isn't real by the people closest to you can send the message that your suffering doesn't matter. This can lead to various challenging emotions, including guilt, shame, and self-doubt.
Impact on seeking help and recovery
When people with depression feel that their condition is imaginary or do not get the support they need from the people who are closest to them, they may be less likely to seek professional help. Research suggests that the length of time that depression goes untreated can lead to worse outcomes. Early recognition and treatment can be crucial to recovery and can be hindered in situations where people do not have family support.
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How to talk to family members about depression
If you feel comfortable discussing your mental health, there may be some communication strategies you can employ to help them understand.
Some families may struggle to believe that an "invisible" illness exists and can have mental and physical impacts. Although they may be kind people whom you love profoundly, their beliefs may cause you to feel alone in your condition. To combat these beliefs, consider the following:
Explaining depression with facts and compassion
Even though it might be difficult, try to be open and honest with your family members about the symptoms you're experiencing. Suppose your family is not open to viewing resources or having an open conversation about depression. In that case, you might also seek support elsewhere or consider family therapy to discuss these challenges further and have a professional to back you up.
When tackling difficult conversations with people who don't understand depression, try to be aware of various resources you can use to combat misinformation with facts. For example, the American Psychiatric Association explains why depression is a real mental health concern with serious impacts. While health websites can be useful resources for learning about certain conditions and treatments, the internet is not considered a reliable source for medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you believe you’re experiencing symptoms of depression, make an appointment with a licensed mental health professional.
Setting boundaries when conversations are harmful
Not every conversation will go well, and it can be important to understand how to protect yourself when these conversations begin to have a negative effect on your mental health.
It can help to acknowledge that other people’s opinions may not be based on a place that is inherently wrong; for example, some loved ones may be coming to you with their concerns from a place of genuine concern and misunderstanding.
However, when family discussions become dismissive or damaging, enforcing firm boundaries can be important. For example, you might limit how often you talk about the topic or insist on getting a therapist involved to mediate the conversation if it escalates and begins to affect your mental health even more. It can also be important to remember that you don’t have to explain yourself, and it is okay to walk away from the conversation if it is causing you harm.
Find professional support for symptoms of depression
When family members aren't supportive, reaching out for professional support may be beneficial. Therapy can be a beneficial way to address depression and alleviate the symptoms you're experiencing. Mental health professionals are well-versed in medically reviewed studies that recognize the impacts depression can have on a person’s health, as well as which treatments are most effective. They can offer treatment advice, diagnosis, and help you cope with your symptoms. If visiting a therapist's office to attend in-person sessions seems insurmountable, you may prefer to try online depression therapy through a platform like BetterHelp, where you can talk to a provider from home.
Efficacy of online therapy with mental health professionals for people with depression
Online platforms can connect you with a therapist specializing in your unique goals and symptoms. You can also connect with multiple therapeutic modalities, depending on your preferences. Online therapy is often customizable to your needs, and you can stop or change therapists anytime.
One study explains that online therapy can be effective in treating depression. The study's participants experienced a notable reduction in depression symptoms sustained long-term after treatment.
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Takeaway
Will depression ever go away?
Recovery from depression is possible, but what works to support recovery can vary significantly from person to person. Some people may be able to work their way through depression on their own without getting treatment, but in some case, it may continue or worsen without treatment. sometimes progressing into persistent depressive disorder that can last for years. Moreover, the extreme sadness and other symptoms associated with a depressive episode may make it more challenging for a person to manage their condition on their own. For example, losing interest in activities and not getting enough sleep, which may be symptoms of depression, can make it hard to function, participate in your usual activities, and interact with others. Experts note that many adults eventually require professional support, medication, or deliberate lifestyle changes to recover.
What is the truth about depression?
The truth about depression is that it can be considered a serious mental disorder, and it affects more than 322 million people worldwide. This condition often involves a depressed mood and is also common among older adults. Contrary to popular misconceptions, depression is more than just “feeling sad,” and it generally isn’t something people can simply “turn off” or “snap out of.” It may co-occur with other mental disorders, such as bipolar disorder, and can be triggered by several factors, including genetics, environment, and life events.
Is depression an actual disorder?
Depression can be a very real and serious mental illness that can become debilitating. Everybody may feel a bit sad from time to time, but people who live with depression are usually experiencing something much deeper than passing sadness. Research indicates that imbalances in certain chemicals that regulate mood, combined with chronic stress, play a role, just as they do in other disorders such as anxiety. Surveys show that most people who learn about these mechanisms come to accept depression as a legitimate health condition that merits treatment and support. Depression can also worsen symptoms of existing medical conditions, potentially causing significant distress.
Is depression a chemical imbalance?
Chemical imbalances can contribute to depression. For example, serotonin imbalances have been considered a biomarker for depression for many decades, justifying the use of certain medications, though current findings suggest that the connection may be more complex. However, the efficacy of selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) to reduce symptoms of depression in many people supports the role of serotonin as a contributing factor. Clinical trials also indicate that other neurotransmitters, such as norepinephrine, dopamine, and glutamate, play a role in depression. Whereas dopamine is associated with motivation and reward, serotonin is linked with emotional processing, which may contribute to a sad mood.
Why do some people believe depression is not real?
There are a number of reasons why people might not believe that depression is real. Some people may have the misconception that people with depression are merely sad or bored, while others may believe it is a form of self-pity that people should be able to snap out of.
Is there scientific evidence for depression?
Yes, there is extensive scientific evidence that depression is a real condition. The big picture view is that it is recognized as a medical condition by every major health organization in the world, including the World Health Organization, the American Psychological Association, and the American Psychiatric Association.
How is clinical depression different from sadness?
Clinical depression differs from sadness in several ways. Sadness is typically temporary and often has a specific trigger. Clinical depression, on the other hand, is a persistent mental health disorder with specific diagnostic criteria. It typically lasts at least two weeks, has symptoms that may include overwhelming hopelessness and loss of interest in activities, and often, symptoms occur without a clear cause.
Can brain chemistry really cause depression?
Depression generally does not have a single cause, but brain chemistry can be a contributing factor. When neurotransmitters such as serotonin, dopamine, and norepinephrine are out of balance, the brain can struggle to regulate mood, motivation, and other responses. That said, while brain chemistry may play a role, experts believe that depression may be a complex disorder caused by a combination of factors rather than brain chemistry alone.
What should I do if my family dismisses my depression?
If you have tried to talk to your family about your depression but nothing you say seems to get through to them, seeking the support of a mental health professional can help. Therapy can be a safe, non-judgmental environment where you can process how you feel about being unsupported, develop healthy coping strategies, focus on behavior change, and build the confidence to work through your symptoms. A therapist can also help you figure out how to set boundaries and protect your mental health when conversations with family members become harmful.
Does treatment for depression actually work?
Treatment for depression can be effective, though the type of treatment that works can vary from one person to the next. Possible treatments may include medication, psychotherapy, lifestyle interventions, or a combination of these.
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