Are you and your partner thinking about opening your love and considering an ethical non-exclusive partnership but are unsure of where to start and how to do it right? How do you comfortably discuss the proposition of polygamy as a non-issue? This concept has been around for as long as time but has caught attention in recent years. Continue reading to learn how this non-exclusive dynamic can work for you and your partner, as well as become familiar with the different types. Therapy, working with an online therapist, can help you and your partner find what works best for you and communicate effectively.
Ethical non-monogamy is the practice of staying with one romantic/sexual partner for the duration of that relationship. If you begin relations with another person during that time, this is a breach of the relationship's understanding, and you are no longer considered exclusive. This is often considered unethical ENM. Therefore, ethical non-monogamy means having multiple sex partners. To practice ethical non-monogamy safely, both parties must understand the different types of relationships. Here are some examples we'll cover in more detail later:
Ethical non-monogamy, or having multiple partners, is not for everyone, and that's okay. Most people are in committed relationships with just one person, meaning a monogamous relationship. However, it's estimated that over one-fifth of Americans have engaged in consensual non-monogamy relationships (21.9%). Unfortunately, those interested in multiple partners often lack social support and understanding. Since the concept is relatively new, it can be difficult to breach the topic with friends, family, neighbors, and co-workers. There are also harmful stereotypes about non-monogamy, which may intimidate those interested in it. When couples make the consensual decision to embark on the a-traditional journey, it can be challenging. However, the partners that receive help in the beginning stages have a greater chance at success-and you can, too!
Here are some of the more common reasons why people don't practice monogamy or engage in a non-monogamous relationship:
When most people think of an ethical non-monogamous relationship, they don't associate it with rules. But to be successful, you and your partner must agree to a contract. This contract will outline what does and does not count as infidelity, and both must be equally on board. In ethical non-monogamous relationships, it's important to follow the contract-if not, resentment may develop. Most people share society's view of polyamory as unethical, regardless of consent. Yet, many married people are unfaithful. About a quarter of men and about 15 percent of women cheat. However, ENM has an ingredient cheating lacks open and honest communication.
When someone is cheating, they aren't communicating ethically, and this does not count as ethical non-monogamy. They are lying, deceiving, and disrespecting their partner. In reality, there should be open communication. All people involved in ENM reveal as much as they agree to in the contract. For some couples, this might be every detail of who, what, when, and where. Others might not want to know more than a name.
Open Relationships
Open relationships are when at least one person in a committed relationship is open to sex with other people. Open relationships require much communication, which can change over time as the partnership evolves. It's become an umbrella term for any sexual relationship.
Swinging
Put simply, swinging is when couples exchange partners. Swinging can involve partners, clubs, friends, parties, and so on.
Polyamory
Polyamory is when someone is in an open relationship with multiple people at once. It can be sexual or romantic, and everyone involved in the polyamory circle stays informed through communication, making it ethical non-monogamy. Polyamory is different from polygamy, as marriage is not involved.
Relationship Anarchy
Relationship anarchists want to end the barrier between sexual and romantic relationships. Our society values sexual relationships over friendships. Relationship anarchy wants to judge the value of relationships on a case-by-case basis, independent of sex. According to relationship anarchists, every relationship is unique and evolves with time. A relationship anarchist may believe in the abundance of love, and that people can have as many relationships as they want.
Polyfidelity
People practicing polyfidelity agree that all members in their relationship are equal. This form of relationship involves people in the relationship exploring sex with each other (and not with others outside of their relationship).
Polygamy
We've all heard of polygamy. To be considered a polygamist, you must marry more than one person. Polygamy is mentioned in many religious texts, and some sects still practice it.
This form involves a wife having multiple husbands. Whereas polygyny involves a husband having multiple wives.
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Engaging in a relationship of ethical non-monogamy is not only possible, but it can also be incredibly rewarding. Open, honest communication will guide your way, and online counselors are here to help light the path.
Healthy non-monogamous relationships are possible. If you need help with navigating ethics and boundaries in your partnership, therapy is a great place to start. Therapy is a personal experience, and not everyone will go into it seeking the same things. Keeping this in mind can ensure that you will get the most out of online therapy, regardless of what your specific goals are. If you’re still wondering if therapy is right for you, and how much therapy costs, please contact us at contact@betterhelp.com. BetterHelp specializes in online therapy to help address all types of mental health concerns. If you’re interested in individual therapy, reach out today to get started.
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