Therapist Paul  Remmele Photo

Paul Remmele, LMFT

Stress, Anxiety Relationships Family conflicts Parenting issues Depression
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About me

As a psychotherapist I am, above all, client directed. I believe in clients’ innate wisdom regarding their inner life. So, my first and primary job as a therapist is to help clients find their true voice. I am then guided by their voice to best help them achieve their therapeutic goals in a collaborative way. Some people respond best by processing emotions, others by a thoughtful discussion that generates cognitive insights and others by changes in behavior. So, my approach is eclectic.
However, even though I find value in a variety of approaches, I believe that a feeling focused psychotherapy can be the quickest and most effective path for healing, and growth. So much of our depression, anxiety and low self-esteem is the result of the pain and hurt that most of us carry around - from our childhood and /or more recent experiences. Expressing and unloading this pain in a safe and supportive environment can provide much relief. And an empathetic psychotherapist can greatly facilitate this process. I have been extensively trained in attachment and feeling orientated therapies. Over the years, I have demonstrated an ability to be with clients through the depths of their most difficult emotions.
Although it’s important to recognize and empathize with a client’s pain and vulnerabilities, it’s equally important to recognize and build on their strengths and unique abilities. People with low self-esteem generally underestimate their very real accomplishments, strengths, and potentials. They greatly benefit from a therapist who can provide encouragement and support while helping them reframe their life story from that of a victim to a survivor who has courageously overcome many obstacles.
I have significant experience working with a wide variety of people. I have worked with individuals from many different ethnic and socio-economic backgrounds. I love working with children of all ages, including mother and toddler dyads. I enjoy working with families and couples, often finding this more dynamic and productive than working with an individual. I have worked successfully with clients who have had attachment issues, troubling emotional issues (e.g., grief, anger, fear) as well as trauma issues. I also have significant experience working with people on the autistic spectrum, as well as those who are socially challenged.
All people have the need to bond with other human beings starting from early childhood when our ability to survive and thrive hinged on a secure attachment to our mothers and fathers. As adults, we continue to need the love and security found in relationship. Unfortunately, many of us have had insecure attachments as children and as a result we suffer insecurity and loneliness as adults. The good news is that insecure adults can now heal attachment issues though the therapeutic relationship. Decades ago my life was dramatically transformed through psychotherapy and now I am motivated to help others transform their lives in a similar way.

Professional experience

14yrs in practice
Stress, Anxiety Relationships Family conflicts Parenting issues Depression

Additional areas of focus: Addictions, LGBT, Trauma and abuse, Grief, Intimacy-related issues, Eating disorders, Sleeping disorders, Anger management, Self esteem, Career difficulties, Bipolar disorder, Coping with life changes, Coaching, Compassion fatigue, ADHD, Abandonment, Adoption and Foster Care, Attachment issues, Autism and Asperger Syndrome, Avoidant Personality, BDSM, Kink, Alternative Sex Culture, Blended Family Issues, Caregiver issues and stress, Codependency, Commitment Issues, Communication problems, Control issues, Coping with Natural or Human-Caused Disaster, Dependent Personality, Disruptive Mood Dysregulation Disorder (DMDD), Dissociation, Divorce and separation, Domestic Violence, Drug and Alcohol Addiction, Emptiness, Family of Origin Issues, Family Problems, Fatherhood Issues, Forgiveness, Gender Dysphoria, Guilt and shame, Hoarding, Impulsivity, Infidelity, Intellectual Disability, Isolation / loneliness, Jealousy, Life purpose, Men's issues, Midlife crisis, Money and financial issues, Mood disorders , Multicultural Concerns, Obsessions, Compulsions, and OCD, Panic disorder and panic attacks, Paranoia, Personality Disorders, Phobias, Polyamory / Nonmonogamous Relationships, Postpartum Depression, Post-traumatic stress, Prejudice and Discrimination, Process addiction (porn, exercise, gambling), Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), Self-Harm, Self-love, Sex Addiction, Sexual Assault and Abuse, Sexual Dysfunction, Sexuality, Smoking/Vaping Cessation, Social anxiety and phobia, Visually Impaired, Workplace issues

Clinical approaches: Attachment-Based Therapy, Client-Centered Therapy, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), Emotionally-Focused Therapy (EFT), Jungian Therapy, Mindfulness Therapy, Motivational Interviewing, Narrative Therapy, Psychodynamic Therapy, Solution-Focused Therapy, Somatic Therapy, Trauma-Focused Therapy

Services offered

Video
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Messaging

License information

CA LMFT 90574