The Psychology Of Adolescence: Developing A Positive Parent-Child Relationship

Medically reviewed by Julie Dodson, MA
Updated March 15, 2024by BetterHelp Editorial Team

The significance of the relationship between parent and child has been highlighted for decades, and the psychology of adolescence is consistently being studied in the fields of medicine and social science. Adolescence can be a time of emotional turmoil and mental health challenges for both parents and teenagers. According to Harvard Graduate School of Education, a recent survey found that “18% of parents reported anxiety and 13% depression, while 18% of teens had anxiety and 15% suffered from depression.” 

Research has shown that the relationship between parent and child can be one of the most complex and impactful relationships any of us will have in our lifetimes. As younger children enter adolescence, a shift in the dynamic of the parent-child relationship tends to take place, and navigating this development can be challenging.

In this article, we’ll explore the psychosocial and physical changes that typically come with adolescence, as well as the importance of forming and maintaining a positive relationship with your child during this critical stage of growth. 

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Having trouble understanding your adolescent?

The stages of psychosocial development in adolescence

The stages of psychosocial development in adolescence can serve as an essential framework for understanding the psychological and social challenges a young individual may encounter during this transformative phase. The onset of adolescence signifies a profound period of growth, self-discovery, and adaptation as children learn to navigate the obstacles and opportunities that come with transitioning into adulthood. As adolescents realize and explore their individuality, a few key stages of psychosocial development are likely to occur.  

In an article published by the National Library of Medicine, psychologist Benson Bradford Brown provides a simplified overview of four key stages

  1. “To stand out—to develop an identity and pursue autonomy,
  2. To fit in—to find comfortable affiliations and gain acceptance from peers,
  3. To measure up—to develop competence and find ways to achieve, and
  4. To take hold—to make commitments to particular goals, activities, and beliefs.”

As these pivotal cognitive and emotional transformations unfold, parents and children typically experience an often-challenging phase of separation. This emotionally abrasive process tends to create tension between parent and child as adolescent thinking patterns evolve. 

When an adolescent moves away from dependency on a parent or caregiver, their ability to think abstractly and reason hypothetically often becomes more apparent. During this time, an adolescent typically begins questioning and developing their identity, values, and belief systems. 

This natural shift from dependency to autonomy can create emotional and social distance between a parent and child. When delving further into education and socially focused activities, adolescents typically spend more time surrounded by peer groups and cultural influences. 

As peer relationships take on heightened importance, adolescents often seek to establish close and meaningful relationships with others as they begin to consider aspects of personal identity, such as sexual orientation, romantic relationships, and the significance of peer influence on their behavior.

As these factors come into play, the commencement of adolescent risk-taking often begins. In the midst of seeking independence, adolescents often engage in risky behaviors as a way to assert their autonomy and test their limits.

Navigating risks may allow children to learn valuable lessons about themselves and the world around them. While some risky behavior in adolescence can prove to be dangerous or simply objectionable in the eyes of a parent, allowing a child to take healthy risks often contributes to overall personal growth. 

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When adolescents face this complex and vital stage of maturation, it can be important for them to have guidance and support from trusted adults to ensure their safety and well-being.

Physical development in adolescence

Alongside the flood of mental, emotional, and cognitive changes that often come with adolescence, a vast number of physical changes typically occur as well. As a child enters their adolescent years, rapid physical developments and other significant changes in the body often begin to take place.  

The body’s natural preparation for adulthood typically leads adolescents into a period that is referred to as puberty, which tends to trigger significant hormonal shifts that lead to physical transformations, such as growth spurts resulting in increased height and weight. Additionally, there is often an increase in muscle mass, strength, and coordination, allowing adolescents to engage in more physically demanding activities.

Finally, adolescent hormonal changes typically lead to the development of the reproductive organs and secondary sexual characteristics. Overall, this period of adolescence marks the start of the gradual bodily transitions that occur between childhood and adulthood. 

The importance of a positive parent-child relationship

While adolescents strive for independence, the emotional strain between parent and child can start to grow. Although effective parent-child communication may become more difficult during this period, the relationship typically still plays a crucial role in providing a secure base from which adolescents can venture into the world.

According to psychoanalytic research, the way a child interacts with their caregiver in their early years may affect their self-esteem, as well as how they handle challenges in the future. By creating a safe and nurturing environment, parents can foster a sense of trust between themselves and their adolescents. 

Establishing this sense of trust and emotional stability may make it easier to keep the lines of communication open regarding important topics such as sexuality, substance use, peer pressure, and risk-taking. Parents who maintain a supportive and understanding stance throughout adolescence may help their children navigate challenges by offering guidance and perspective while still allowing for greater autonomy.

Online therapy for parenting challenges

Due to the significance of the changes that occur during the stages of adolescence, parents may benefit from guidance as they raise their children. Therapy can be a valuable resource for parents looking for encouragement, advice for strengthening their bond with their children, and tips for communicating with their children more effectively. Through therapy, parents may gain a deeper understanding of their child’s needs and emotions while simultaneously receiving personal guidance and support. 

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Having trouble understanding your adolescent?

For parents who don’t have time for traditional in-person therapy, online therapy offers an affordable, convenient option to in-office therapy. With online therapy, parents can connect with a licensed therapist through phone calls, video chats, or in-app messaging. Instead of driving long distances or having to worry about running into someone they know, parents can get support from the comfort of their home or anywhere with an internet connection.  

The efficacy of online therapy for parenting issues

Along with convenience and cost-effectiveness, online therapy has been proven to provide high-quality care, with research showing it is equally as effective as in-person therapy. In one study published in JMIR Mental Health, researchers found that a digital cognitive behavioral therapy intervention reduced symptoms of depression and anxiety. These outcomes were maintained at 6- and 9-month follow-ups. Cognitive behavioral therapy is a therapeutic approach that recognizes the link between an individual’s thoughts, behaviors, and emotions. By identifying unhelpful thoughts and creating more positive thinking patterns, individuals can often learn how to change their behaviors.  

Takeaway

As adolescents experience various stages of growth, a positive parent-child relationship can be highly beneficial to their overall development. By providing an understanding and nurturing environment, parents can help their children enter adulthood with a strong and integrated identity, as well as a solid foundation for future partnerships, friendships, and social connections. Ultimately, a positive parent-child relationship during the stages of adolescence can promote positive mental health, emotional well-being, and a sense of resilience that can contribute to a smooth transition from childhood to adulthood. 

Parents who experience difficulty navigating the complexities involved with parenting teens could benefit from therapy, whether in person or online. With BetterHelp, you can be matched with a therapist who has experience helping parents of adolescents. Take the first step toward getting support as a parent and reach out to BetterHelp today.

Adolescence can be a challenging life stage
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