Pros And Cons Of Dating Over 50

Medically reviewed by April Brewer
Updated February 25, 2024by BetterHelp Editorial Team

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Finding love can be challenging at any age

The idea of dating after 50 may sound daunting at first. It may have been many years since you last dated, and you may be worried about what to do and how to do it. You might wonder if the rules and norms for dating have changed over the years.

In one respect, dating over 50 is the same as dating at any age in that the main goal is typically the same: to find someone to be happy with. While the things that make us happy may change as we age, there is often an element of excitement and anticipation in dating, regardless of age. Finding someone who enjoys the same things as we do can be uplifting, no matter the age or activity.

The pros of dating over 50

One perk of dating after 50 is that people at this age may be less likely to have young children, which can free up time for enjoying the company of others. If you have adult children, you may find that dating can be easier for them to understand than it is for younger ones. 

After 50, some people may also find that they know themselves better, which may in turn help them meet people with whom they can form a mutually fulfilling relationship. Also, after a certain age, some people enjoy a little more financial stability, which may relieve the pressure that some people feel when trying to balance a career and relationships at a younger age.

The potential cons of dating over 50

Dating over 50 may also pose a few challenges, depending on your circumstances. For example, some people over 50 have an elderly parent to take care of. They may have taken in a parent to care for them, and if the new partner is considering moving in, this is something they may have to accept for the relationship to continue.

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Another potential challenge with dating over 50 is related to health problems. Some people may feel a little self-conscious about the physical changes that tend to happen in middle age. For example, men may feel less energetic than when they were younger, and women may experience menopause. In addition to the physical challenges of menopause, it can sometimes lead to changes in mood, anxiety, and depression. Also, people of all genders may experience a bit of nervousness related to sex after 50.

Sex after 50

It is a myth that people over 50 don’t have a desire for sex or are simply unable to have sex anymore.

Research shows that most people between the ages of 50 and 65 are still very much interested in sex. According to a poll of people aged 65 to 80, nearly two-thirds of respondents were interested in sex, and 54% of individuals with a partner remained sexually active.

Although physical attraction does often play a role in relationships, people over 50 may be more likely to understand that looks aren't everything. That means it may be possible to develop a truly fulfilling relationship with someone who has similar interests, even if they look different from what a person considers their type.

Another possible advantage of dating over 50 is that talking about sex may be easier in later years. Often older, more experienced individuals may be better equipped to recognize what they are looking for as well as what others are looking for in a relationship.  

Dating someone whose partner has passed

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Finding love can be challenging at any age

Many individuals who start dating again after 50 do so because they have experienced the death of their spouse. As a result, their new partners may be concerned that they will never measure up to the spouse that came before them. While this is a valid concern, it may be unwarranted.

From a mental health perspective, each person can experience the grieving process differently. Some people may feel they need to wait longer than others to date again, and this is a valid option. 

If you meet someone who is talks often about their deceased spouse, then it may be too early for them to be in a committed relationship. This doesn’t necessarily mean you aren’t compatible; they may simply need more time.  

Still, it’s not uncommon for a person to speak of their late partner from time to time. If you’re dating someone whose spouse died, it may help to simply listen without feeling threatened. You don’t have to live up to anyone’s expectations, and you have freedom to meet other people if you sense that the relationship isn’t meant to go beyond friendship at this time.

Getting help with dating over 50

If you’re over 50 and interested in dating again, you may benefit from speaking to a counselor. A therapist may be able to help you find renewed confidence as you navigate the process of dating again.

If you don’t feel comfortable seeing a therapist in person, you might consider online therapy. With online therapy, you can connect with a therapist in a way that’s comfortable for you, whether by phone, videoconference, live chat, or a combination of these modalities. Also, you can often choose a therapist and get started within 48-72 hours. 

Online therapy has been shown to be just as effective as traditional in-office therapy. One meta-analysis published in the Journal of Technology in Human Services found there to be no difference in effectiveness between in-person and online therapy

Takeaway

Dating over 50 can present some challenges but can also offer unique opportunities to connect with others. If you’re looking for support as you consider dating again, you may benefit from speaking to a therapist, whether in person or online. With BetterHelp, you can be matched with a therapist who has experience helping people navigate the challenges of dating over 50. Take the first step toward getting support with dating at this stage and reach out to BetterHelp today.
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