What Is Friendship? Benefits Of Emotional Support On Mental Health

Friendships can be among the most important and meaningful personal relationships we experience. Unlike familial bonds, true friendships may be chosen, nurtured, and sustained through mutual effort and care. While the dynamics between good friends may change, the core values and experiences that friends have had together can help to maintain healthy friendships over time.

Developing friendships may be important for both mental and physical health, and people with close friendships may experience an enhanced quality of life. While it may be easy for some people to make friends, not everyone feels comfortable when starting new relationships. In this article, we’ll answer “What is friendship?” and provide strategies for developing healthy relationships with friends.  

At its core, friendship is a bond between two people that extends beyond mere acquaintance or casual interactions. Most friendships include mutual care, appreciation, and understanding of one another. While many friends enjoy spending time together, the bond of good friendships can be a beautiful thing that extends beyond this and may include developing trust and providing emotional support. For example, some lifelong friends may end up living together as retirees. 

Friendship can exist on a spectrum, and not all friendships stand the test of time or develop into close relationships. What is friendship? Real friendship is usually a bond that can stand the tests of time and distance. In some cases, this bond may be built on mutual experiences or challenges overcome together. Even after plenty of time apart, close friends can pick up where they left off. 

Elements of genuine friendship

Friendship may look different for different people and cultures. There are some typical elements of friendship that people have in common. Some of the elements that define friendships may include: 

• Trust and honesty. Growing any healthy relationship, whether it be a romantic relationship or a friendship, may start with building trust. Genuine friendship may require that each person in the relationship trust the other. Building trust may involve being dependable and open with your friends about your feelings and acting in their best interest. 
• Mutual respect and care. Best friends typically care and respect one another. This mutual respect may be what ensures that both parties feel valued and cared for. It can also contribute to feelings of equality or fairness in the friendship. 
• Emotional support and empathy. Friends usually know they can lean on each other when times get tough or if they need support. Having a best friend to talk with and bounce ideas off of can help manage life’s challenges. By providing emotional support for one another, friends can also develop a strong sense of empathy and understanding for the other person. 
• Shared history. For many people, time and longevity can help to build a strong friendship. Friends may take on many of life’s challenges together, which may strengthen their bond. 

Different types of friendship

There are all different types of connections that can be considered friendship. Let’s take a closer look at some of the more common forms. 

Close friends, casual friends, and acquaintances

The expectations of friendships can vary, depending on the people involved and the closeness of the bond. Factors that differentiate levels of friendship include emotional closeness, expectations, and boundaries. For example, acquaintances are individuals who may know each other enough to expect a friendly greeting, but not much more.

Casual friends may share a common interest or interests and enjoy spending time together, but do not experience a great deal of emotional closeness. Close friends, on the other hand, can be a part of each other’s families, spending holidays and other important times together. Healthy boundaries can be even more important in close relationships, as lines can become blurred. 

Lifelong friendships and friendships by life stage

Some friendships can last from childhood until golden years, while others may come into your life at different times or ebb and flow around different circumstances. Most people find it easier to make friends in childhood to young adulthood, when circumstances put everyone together in common places and interests (school, college, fraternities and sororities, afterschool activities, camps, etc.)

However, valuable friendships can spring up at any time in life, from young adulthood to old age. Some of these friendships may originate in work relationships, or as young parents, or around preferred hobbies like the gym. Friendships may deeply support and encourage you at certain times in your life, and cool off at others. 

Factors that may create shifts in friendships include:

• Moving away from the area
• Marriage or children
• Career change
• Changes in values
• Mental health conditions

Characteristics that strengthen friendships

Friendships are often founded on shared interests, but they are relationships that can be strengthened over time. There are friendship skills that you can develop that may help to build stronger connections. Some characteristics that may help to strengthen relationships between friends may include emotional support, vulnerability, and communication. 

Strong emotional support

Friends can be a source of strong emotional support and encouragement. When two friends support one another, their friendship may grow stronger. Being a source of support can build trust and may be a way of showing dependability and consistency. Close friends may discuss challenges that they are going through and may be able to provide each other with support and strategies for moving forward in the face of adversity. 

Vulnerability

Building trust may require both friends to be vulnerable when with one another. Being vulnerable can mean opening up to a friend in a way that you do not with other people. This may include discussing personal challenges or struggles. When two friends are vulnerable, it can help to build trust and may bring them closer together. 

Communication 

Physical and mental health benefits of friendship

While it can be nice to have a close group of friends to spend time with, friendship may also have physical and mental health benefits. The following are some of the ways that friendship may improve physical and mental health:

Physical health benefits 

The physical health benefits of friendship may include a lower risk of cardiovascular conditions. Research suggests that people who can attend social events with their best friends or other friends may have lower stress and anxiety, which, in turn, may lower the risk of heart disease or high blood pressure. Friendship and social connection may also be linked to lower mortality rates overall when compared with social isolation.

Mental health benefits

The mental health benefits of friendship are well-documented, with a strong support network leading to reduced anxiety, stress, and incidents of depression during difficult times. Friendship can provide support and a network of trust, which can reduce feelings of anxiety around major life events. It may also provide a means of self-validation when uncertainties arise, or promote personal growth. 

How friendships change over time

While friendship may be an important part of living a happy and healthy life, it can be challenging at times to build and maintain friendships over the course of a lifetime. Two of the major challenges that friendships can face are miscommunication and conflicts. In some cases, miscommunications may also cause a conflict, especially as individuals grow from adolescence into adulthood and their lives become busier and more complicated.

In some cases, friends may grow apart, and this can happen for a variety of reasons. For some friends, their values or needs may change. Friends may have met and had a lot in common when they were young teens, but after a few years, they may lose common interests, which can make it challenging to remain close.

Difficult times can also play a part in challenging relationships. Sometimes, a life change can separate friends, especially if one doesn’t have the time or emotional energy to manage the emotional consequences. If one of the people involved experiences personal growth that makes them realize that their own desires aren’t being met, this can also impact the relationship. However, even when friends grow apart, these same shifts may make it possible to be able to rekindle a friendship after years apart. 

Can social media improve friendship?

Social media has changed the way that friends interact with one another. With social media, there can be both benefits and drawbacks for friendship. Friends can easily stay in touch over long distances. What may be negative is that friends may rely on social media for connection, leading to superficial interactions. The key to using social media to improve friendships may be to find balance and consistency.

Potential pros and cons of friendship on social media

Friendship may look different on social media than it does in real life. Interacting on social media typically allows for an instantaneous connection and delivery of communication. What this means is that friends can send videos, tag each other, and interact online at all hours. This may open up new ways of communicating with one another and can enhance friendships. Friends can also send audio messages digitally, which can help to maintain a relationship even over great distances.

Possible negative impacts of social media on friendships

Social media can also negatively affect some friendships. Communication may become less frequent as friends may simply scroll each other’s feeds. Friends may use short check-ins on social media as a substitute for in-person visits with their friends.

Building and maintaining a friendship can be challenging, and friendships may face many obstacles. During difficult times, when certain friendships can feel overwhelming or isolating, therapy can be an effective tool. Working with a therapist can be a way to build the skills that you need to make new friends and deepen old friendships, such as:

• Communication skills
• Conflict resolution
• Emotional intimacy
• Processing negative emotions

If you don’t have time for traditional in-person therapy, you might find support through online therapy.  

Getting support through BetterHelp

Online therapy sessions with a platform like BetterHelp can occur anywhere with an internet connection and personal device, which means that you can attend sessions from the comfort of your own home. With online therapy, you are also not limited to working with therapists in your local area, which gives you the flexibility to choose a therapist who fits your needs, regardless of location.    

Online therapy may be an effective way to reduce the impact of several mental health conditions while also building communication skills that can improve friendships. An online therapist may provide you with tailored support and mindfulness activities that can help you communicate more effectively with your friends.