How To Reduce Nervousness In Various Circumstances

Sweaty palms, a racing heartbeat, and a shaky voice are common signs that your nerves have taken over. When you're used to experiencing nervousness throughout life, imagining a life without this emotion may be difficult. However, with practice, you can learn techniques to manage and overcome your nervousness in various settings and circumstances, potentially enabling you to move forward productively.

Methods for reducing nervousness

Below are a few methods you can try at home, work, or in public to reduce nervousness, regardless of the cause. 

Develop self-confidence

A lack of self-confidence may make you prone to experiencing nervousness while attending social events or performing in public. You may struggle to deliver a speech, get through a job interview, talk to new people, or plan for a potentially nerve-racking experience. In these cases, expecting to fail or embarrass yourself can exacerbate nervousness. To overcome these circumstances, it may help to build up your confidence. Before a challenging event, count your strengths instead of focusing on your weaknesses, try activities outside your comfort zone, and avoid comparing yourself to others. 

Realizing that no one else can know what you think and feel by looking at you can be helpful. This worry may be called the "fishbowl" phenomenon. In this phenomenon, people experience thoughts like, "Everyone will know I am nervous" or "People will see that I am not prepared." However, people are often concerned with their own lives and problems to the extent that they might not pay much mind to judging you.

Prepare yourself

Before you knowingly go into a situation that may make you nervous, a helpful exercise can be to ask yourself, "What is the worst that can happen"? Follow that thought through to its conclusion. The nervous brain often focuses on the worst possible scenario. However, planning for how you'd react in the worst-case scenario can help you be prepared in case it does occur, even if it's unlikely. You might notice that you are often better prepared than you think to cope with challenges.  

It may also help to imagine the best-case scenario. At this point, you may not know the outcome, so the outcome could be positive. Ask yourself the following questions: 

• How important is this situation to me?
• How will I celebrate when I meet my goal?  
• Is this a significant goal? 
• Do I want to be stopped from accomplishing a meaningful task because of momentary discomfort? 
• What could help me ensure my success?  

If you struggle to develop solutions alone, talking it through with someone you trust may be beneficial. If you plan for all scenarios, your body and mind may automatically respond to challenges with your plan instead of reacting with fear. 

Practice self-care 

You may be more nervous when you have not attended to physical and emotional needs, like agreeing to another obligation when you are already pressed for time. Consider identifying areas of your life that could benefit from attention, whether focusing on eating a healthy diet or ensuring you are well-rested.

Add a healthy exercise routine, spend time outdoors, and surround yourself with supportive friends and family. If you're experiencing emotional challenges, try to discover healthy ways to overcome them, perhaps with the assistance of a professional. When your basic needs are attended to, coping with nerves in a high-stress situation may be more manageable. 

Reframe how you look at failure

Failure or the idea of failure can make some individuals want to give up. However, reframing failure as an opportunity for growth or a situation that leads to a better opportunity may help you. For example, if you don't get a job you applied for, it may mean you'll get a better and higher-paying job soon. People who give up after their first failure may not see possible wins in the future. When you're not afraid of failing, you may not be as nervous when you try to meet your goals. 

Breathe deeply

If you cannot avoid a tense or stressful situation, modulating your nervous system may help. First, try taking a deep breath that fills the space underneath your lungs. Some people breathe shallowly into their lungs instead of making their breath slow and controlled. Deep breathing techniques can give you time to settle into the situation and take charge. It can also supply your brain with more oxygen to think clearly. You can use breathing exercises to incite a sense of calm anywhere, at any moment. As the situation unfolds, you can continue to focus on your breathing to control your nerves.   

Practice other forms of relaxation

Other methods of relaxation you can use to calm your nervous system may include progressive muscle relaxation, visualization, and mindfulness. Progressive muscle relaxation involves purposely tensing one muscle group at a time before relaxing those muscles. Your muscles hold a lot of tension, so progressive relaxation may reduce nervousness by reducing the physical tension that contributes to it. 

Another tool is visualization, during which you create a space in your mind that evokes peace. Seeing this place in your mind's eye can relax you and remind you that you have control over your thoughts. Mindfulness exercises train your brain to stay in the moment by focusing your awareness on your senses, not your thoughts. In addition, these exercises have been associated with reduced anxiety and stress in studies, common causes of nervousness.

Speak to a professional 

If your nerves are getting in the way of your ability to live productively, it may be helpful to speak with a counselor. A mental health professional can equip you with calming techniques and tools for your most challenging moments.

If you face barriers to traditional counseling, a platform like BetterHelp may provide an alternative way to receive care. Through an online platform, you can choose between phone, video, or live chat sessions with your therapist. In addition, you can sign up for support groups led by professionals to meet others living with mental health challenges. This process may ease some nervousness from seeing a mental health counselor. 

Research has shown that online therapy can be as effective as face-to-face therapy for managing symptoms of various mental health conditions. One study published in ScienceDirect found that online cognitive-behavioral therapy successfully treated nervousness and anxiety, with results lasting over one year later.