How To Move On From A Relationship And Start Healing
Updated August 27, 2020
Medically Reviewed By: Laura Angers
Breaking up with someone is never easy and being the one who got dumped can sometimes be even tougher. You put a lot of focus on your romantic relationships in life and it can feel horrible when things don’t go as planned. You might have even loved this person that you used to be in a relationship with. This can make it tough for some people to move on and they wind up getting stuck in a rut for years. No one wants to feel like they’re living in the past, but sometimes you don’t realize what you’re doing to yourself until it’s become a huge problem. Take a look at the following advice about how to move on from a relationship and start healing. It should allow you to get yourself to a better place so that you can love again.
Let Yourself Have Feelings
Some people hold onto baggage for many years due to not letting themselves process emotions from a breakup. You are going to feel emotional after breaking up with someone in most situations. Some people will feel a sense of relief if a relationship was really negative and others will feel very sad if they loved the person that they were with. It doesn’t really matter what your emotions are. It just matters that you allow yourself to feel.
Take the time to be sad if you need to. Allow yourself to cry and know that this doesn’t make you weak or unusual. Gender has nothing to do with how you process emotions from a breakup either. You need to be honest about your feelings so that you can get it all out. It’s fine to be in a negative place when something like this happens so long as you don’t try to stay there too long. Be ready to process your emotions and know that you don’t have to do this alone.
Let Your Support System Help
Your support system is going to be a big part of helping you to move on after you have gone through a breakup. People need to have a support system in place for moments just like this. If you have people that you can turn to when you’re feeling down, then you’re going to have a much better time getting over everything. Your people will be there for you and they can help you with many things. Sometimes you just might want to vent, and other times, it might be more about seeing advice. Don’t hesitate to reach out to friends and family when you’re going through a situation like this.
Get Rid of Things That Remind You of the Relationship
Don’t make the mistake of hanging onto things that remind you of your relationship. Some people might not be bothered by this, but if you’re having trouble moving on, then it isn’t going to be good to have a bunch of your ex-partner’s stuff in your house. Kindly ask your ex-partner to come to get their things. If they don’t oblige after a certain amount of time has passed, then you shouldn’t feel guilty about throwing things out or donating them. You don’t need reminders of your past relationship putting you in a bad space mentally. Also, it can be detrimental to have other people’s things around for when you want to start dating again.
Take Time for Self-Assessment
Taking time for self-assessment can also make it easier to move on and start healing. Being able to be honest with yourself about what happened in your past relationship is crucial. You might have done everything right and been a fantastic partner. It’s also possible that you could have made mistakes and that learning from those mistakes could make you a better person moving forward. After you have had time to process your emotions, it’s going to be healthy to do some self-assessment. If you have regrets and know that you did certain things wrong, then you can acknowledge your faults and promise yourself that you’ll do better next time.
Focus on Your Health
Focusing on your health is going to be a good way to help you to move on, too. Don’t worry if you’re not in the best shape right now. When your relationship ends it’s easy to fall into bad habits and stop working out. You might even turn to comfort food if you’re feeling a bit depressed about how things went down. After you’ve had a bit of time to pick up the pieces, it’s going to be beneficial to start focusing on your health again. Making healthy choices will put you in a better place mentally and it’ll definitely help you physically.
Try to come up with an exercise routine that will make sense for your fitness level. If you have certain conditions, then it might be prudent to discuss this with your doctor before going through with it. You want to do things as safely as you can while finding exercise types that will help you to meet your fitness goals. It’s going to be great to get into better shape and it’ll give you a confidence boost as you consider moving on and starting to date someone new. You can feel positive about your body while also ensuring that you have more stamina to tackle everyday life responsibilities. It’s also fantastic when it comes to reducing stress levels and alleviating mild anxiety symptoms.
Exercise isn’t the only area that you need to focus on, though. If possible, you should start to make some changes to your diet that will help you out. Watching your calories and cutting out processed foods could help you to feel more focused while also making it easier to maintain healthy weight levels. If you don’t feel like you can focus on a diet right now, then just try to watch your food intake since it’ll be a good way to keep things on track. Be mindful of what you’re putting in your body and you’ll have a much easier time feeling positive about the future.
Hobbies Help a Lot
Hobbies help a lot as well because they give you something fun to focus on. If you can find a new hobby, then that can make it easier to stop worrying about your past relationship. You might even already have some hobbies that you just haven’t been able to enjoy in a long time. You might be an avid reader or you could enjoy playing basketball. Hobbies are fun and you can take up new hobbies if you feel that you have the time for it. Taking some time out to have fun again will make you feel better and it’ll be easy to find a new passion if you’re looking for one. There is a long list of great hobbies to participate in and it’s up to you to decide which ones appeal to you.
Start Dating Again
Start dating again only once you feel like you’re absolutely ready for it. It is actually very negative to date again when you aren’t over your ex-partner. If you decide to date again too soon, then you could wind up hurting someone nice by not being able to dedicate yourself to the relationship. You don’t want that and you want to make sure that you’re really going to be in the right place mentally before you seek someone new. Process your emotions and take some time for yourself to just enjoy being single. Once you feel that you have had enough time, it’s going to be time to move on and find someone nice to date.
There are many places that you can go to meet singles in your area. Some people meet other singles at the gym and others just meet people through mutual acquaintances. Online dating is also an option where you could easily find people who are looking for dates in your area. Just take things slow and get to know someone before jumping into a serious relationship. If you are able to use the lesson of the past effectively, then you should be able to enjoy a better relationship this time around.
Therapy is a good thing to consider for anyone who is having trouble moving on from a relationship. Healing doesn’t come easily for some people and you might be haunted by regrets. Don’t worry if you’re having a hard time because many people have been in your situation before. You’re not alone and you can turn to a skilled therapist for assistance. A therapist is going to be able to help you to unpack all of the emotional baggage that you have associated with your past relationship. You might need to deal with that before you’re ever going to be able to truly move on and love again.
Thankfully, finding a therapist that will be able to help you is going to be decidedly easy. You can find a local therapist and go to a traditional therapy office. It’s also possible to find an online therapist by going to platforms such as BetterHelp. This is a great way to get therapy because you don’t even have to leave your house. It’s convenient and affordable. It’s time to move on from the things that are holding you back in life. You can find the help that you need and you’ll always be able to count on your therapist to guide you through tumultuous times in your life.