10 Tips To Boost Your Self-Confidence

Medically reviewed by Melissa Guarnaccia, LCSW
Updated May 29, 2024by BetterHelp Editorial Team

Have you ever seen people who seem to have natural self-confidence and wondered where it came from? If so, you’re not alone.

Some people may seem to have more self-confidence naturally in the way they behave and handle situations. However, self-confidence is not an all-or-nothing trait. Instead, self-confidence is something that can be nourished and improved as we change our beliefs.

Below, we’ll explore 10 strategies for boosting your self-confidence.

Speaking with a therapist can help with self-confidence issues

10 tips to boost your self-confidence

Having high self-confidence and self-esteem is often viewed as a component of mental health. When you feel good about yourself, it may reflect in the way you interact with people. Negative self-talk and negative thoughts might hinder your ability to feel good and may lead to feelings of inadequacy. However, there are ways to improve your self-esteem in the long term. 

By identifying and challenging negative self-talk, you can learn to feel more confident and comfortable in your own skin. Taking small steps to boost your confidence and feel good about yourself can have a significant impact on your mental health and overall well-being.

These tips might help boost your self-confidence so you can feel more comfortable with who you are. 

  1. Quell negative thoughts

Our inner dialogue can play a significant role in our self-confidence. When you have negative thoughts about yourself, your job, your relationships, etc., they might affect your self-esteem. It may help to silence the negativity as much as possible and start replacing those negative thoughts with positive ones. To begin identifying negative thoughts, you may find it useful to write down any unhelpful thoughts when you notice them. This may improve your awareness so that you can stop yourself from identifying with negative thoughts and begin replacing them. 

  1. Surround yourself with positivity

Cultivating positive thoughts can serve as a good foundation, but the people around you can have a significant influence on your self-confidence as well. Consider surrounding yourself with people who build you up and encourage you to pursue what you want in life, not people who make you feel bad about yourself.

  1. Learn how to say “no”

Cultivating self-confidence often entails controlling our own actions. Sometimes, regardless of their intentions, the people around us push us to do things that make us feel uncomfortable or create stress in our lives. When these circumstances arise, it may help to be assertive and have the confidence to say no when you need to. You may think that you're being mean, but it’s acceptable to safeguard your mental health and practice assertiveness when needed.

  1. Think about what makes you feel attractive

It can be easy to fall into the trap of looking for imperfections in ourselves, both inside and outside. Instead, you might make a list of things that make you attractive. You might begin with qualities that make you a good friend, sibling, parent, or coworker. Then, you might list some of the physical attributes that make you unique. 

You can also find ways to bring out your natural beauty by making small changes. Sometimes, even the simplest change to the way we look can make us feel good about ourselves. For example, you might try a new hairstyle, buy an article of clothing that you like, get a manicure, etc. These kinds of changes can sometimes go a long way toward making us feel more confident in the world. 

Getty/Xavier Lorenzo
  1. Work on body language

Small things like walking with our shoulders back and our chin up can cultivate feelings of confidence, as can making eye contact and projecting our voice appropriately when speaking with others. You might consider trying to be confident in the way you carry yourself, even if you don't necessarily feel that way yet. How you act in front of others may not only make them think you're confident but also boost your confidence.

  1. Do something brave once a week

It can be frightening to put ourselves out there, but sometimes the risk can be worth the reward. Taking risks—even when they seem random—doesn't necessarily mean going bungee jumping or mountain climbing. You can simply do something to step out of your comfort zone. Perhaps you might talk to that person you’re interested in. Even if it doesn’t turn out the way you want it to, just taking the leap shows self-confidence and may make you feel proud of yourself.

  1. Be prepared for self-criticism

Sometimes people's criticism can be harsh, but our criticism of ourselves is likely the hardest. We all know that no one is perfect, yet most people tend to expect more from themselves than is realistic. To combat this habit, it may help to write down all your strengths and remind yourself of them each time you begin to criticize yourself. 

  1. Set goals for yourself

Achieving goals is one way to feel accomplished and confident. You don’t have to set large goals; you might begin with small goals that you can easily achieve. For example, you might set a goal to take a walk every day after work. It may be helpful to keep a list of the accomplishments that have made you feel proud. You can use this list as motivation to get you to achieve your bigger goals.

  1. Love yourself

How you feel about yourself can often affect how you treat yourself. Caring for and nourishing your health, both physical and mental, may help you see yourself from a more caring perspective, similarly to how you might see a friend or loved one. When you love your mind and body and look after them, you may find that you feel more confident in yourself.

Acts of self-care like improving your sleeping habits or exercising can go a long way. You might also consider picking up a sport to increase your energy and reduce stress. Also, eating healthy meals and caring for your hygiene might boost your self-confidence. 

  1. Be grateful and helpful

Doing good things for others can make us feel good about ourselves. The smallest gestures, like smiling or holding the door for someone, can make a big difference to someone. You can also consider taking an active role in volunteering. Being able to make a positive difference for someone may make you feel good and improve your self-image.

Seeing all the positive changes that you can bring to others may also make you more grateful for the people and things in your life. 

Get personalized self-confidence tips from a licensed counselor

Getty/Vadym Pastukh
Speaking with a therapist can help with self-confidence issues

Boosting your self-confidence may take time, but if you stay committed to cultivating self-love, your self-confidence will likely follow. For further assistance, you can also speak to a licensed counselor who can coach you through a personalized plan to boost your self-confidence. Having a professional with experience helping people establish a healthy sense of self can be an effective way to set yourself up for success. 

If you need a boost of self-confidence, or if you feel that your lack of self-confidence may stem from a deeper mental health concern, speaking to a therapist online may be an effective, comfortable option. Online counseling allows you to gain advice and treatment via phone or videoconference, which may be easier if you are experiencing low confidence at this time. Numerous studies in peer-reviewed journals have demonstrated that online counseling can be just as effective as in-office counseling, and it tends to be more affordable. 

Counselor reviews

“Cameron has helped me navigate some incredibly challenging things within my relationship. With his help, I’ve developed the confidence to be a more assertive person. Therapy has helped me understand myself and my partner much better, in addition to implementing practices and taking action to improve a situation whereas I otherwise may feel stuck or hopeless. I really loved that he took the time to get to know me and my history before trying to “tell me what to do.” I feel like he really understands how my mind operates and therefore can give great, valuable advice, in addition to being a comforting sounding board.”

“Like talking to a friend, I have gained confidence, and was able to have a tough conversation that took years to have, thanks to her encouragement and advice. I thoroughly recommend Cynthia.”


If you are experiencing challenges relating to self-confidence, you are not alone. Many people go through times of low self-confidence throughout life. Aside from using the strategies above, you can be matched with a counselor with training and experience to help you develop a plan that’s tailored to your needs and designed to boost your self-confidence. Take the first step toward greater self-confidence and reach out to BetterHelp today.
You are deserving of positive self-esteem
The information on this page is not intended to be a substitution for diagnosis, treatment, or informed professional advice. You should not take any action or avoid taking any action without consulting with a qualified mental health professional. For more information, please read our terms of use.
Get the support you need from one of our therapistsGet started