Temperament And Parenting: Important Things To Keep In Mind

In the context of child development, temperament usually refers to a set of inherent characteristics that may influence a child’s personality as they mature. The importance of temperament may go beyond personality, though, with potential implications regarding parenting styles. Simply put, children with different temperaments may benefit from different parenting styles that are customized to meet their unique needs and preferences. If you’re unsure as to how best to parent your child according to their temperament, consider speaking with a licensed therapist in person or online.

What is temperament?

In developmental psychology, temperament may describe a range of innate characteristics and inborn traits that influence the way a person interacts with and responds to the world. 

Temperament can differ from personality in that it may refer to behaviors, actions, and reactions, rather than beliefs and values. It may also have a strong biological component. 

While updated evidence may be necessary, according to the National Library of Medicine, 20% to 60% of temperament is estimated to be based on genetics, while childhood environment may influence the activation of other genes. 

Unlike personality, temperament tends to be fixed. A child’s temperament may stay the same from infancy through early adolescence and beyond. 

Still, there may be some overlap between personality and temperament. Temperament can be considered one of the foundational aspects of personality, although a variety of other factors might also contribute to a child’s personality. These may include environment, life experiences, values, and beliefs, for example. Parents may find that different parenting styles are more beneficial and effective depending on their child’s specific temperament. 

Understanding child temperament

A variety of models have been proposed for defining and viewing a child’s temperamental traits. These have evolved over time. Today, they tend to emphasize a range of possible characteristics and behavioral aspects. One popular model used by researchers was developed by psychologist Mary K. Rothbart. It separates children’s temperament into three “dimensions,” including:

• Negative affect: Negative affect generally refers to a child’s tendencies toward emotions like fear, sadness, anger, and frustration. It may also encompass tendencies like shyness. 
• Surgency/extraversion: The dimension of surgency and extraversion generally relates to a child’s impulsivity and search for stimulation. A child with high levels of surgency might be energetic, happy, and sensation-seeking, while a child with lower levels of surgency might be more reserved or shy. 
• Effortful control: In Rothbart’s model, effortful control may refer to a child’s tendency to plan and focus their attention without getting distracted. Effortful control may also refer to a child’s ability to perform an undesirable task.

Another prominent model of child temperament was developed by a group of psychiatrists, including Stella Chess and Alexander Thomas. It generally breaks temperament into nine characteristics, with behaviors in each category existing on a continuum. These characteristics typically include the following:

• Activity level or energy
• Regularity of biological functions
• Intensity of emotions
• Adaptability in response to new situations
• Mood or outlook
• Distractibility from the current task
• Persistence when faced with challenges
• Sensitivity to stimuli, such as lights or sounds
• Initial reaction to new people or situations
  

These and other models for viewing child temperament have usually evolved over time, and they may continue to change in response to future research. Even so, they may provide useful context for existing research on parenting and temperament, as well as additional insight into children’s ways of responding to the world. 

Temperament and parenting: Other considerations

A variety of research has been conducted on the relationship between temperament and the parent-child relationship, as well as its implications for social development and the brain. A 2015 study found that among children with temperamental characteristics like exuberance and dysphoria, positive parenting was usually associated with varying levels of socially appropriate behavior later in life.

A separate 2015 study published in the Journal of Abnormal Child Psychology found that behavioral inhibition in early childhood, combined with a harsh parenting style in middle childhood, was often associated with diminished responses in the ventrolateral prefrontal cortex. This suggests that temperament and parenting style may affect the brain itself.

Given that temperament consists of a variety of inborn characteristics, and no two children are exactly the same, it may be advisable for parents to take their children’s temperaments into account when determining their parenting styles. 

For example, authoritative parenting might work better than authoritarian parenting when it comes to children with behavioral inhibition. Meanwhile, children with high levels of sensitivity might require a different approach than children with lower levels of sensitivity. 

Finding support on your parenting journey

Parenting may come with challenges, particularly when it comes to understanding a child’s temperament. It can be difficult to determine how a child’s temperament relates to their personality and how to best navigate these characteristics. Parents of children with challenging temperaments or personalities that conflict with their own may find themselves experiencing feelings of stress, confusion, or frustration.

For those in need of support while navigating the challenges of parenting, therapy may be a useful resource. A therapist can offer a safe space to discuss the emotions around parenting. They may also be able to give advice for nurturing your own mental health during challenging times. 

Benefits of online therapy

It may be difficult for parents to find the time and energy to commute to a therapist’s office for in-person therapy. Those who find themselves juggling busy schedules and the commitments of parenthood may find online therapy to be a helpful alternative. With remote therapy, you can attend sessions from wherever is most convenient. Remote therapy can also be more flexible, offering appointment slots around the clock.

Effectiveness of online therapy

Online therapy has been thoroughly researched, and it can be an effective and cost-efficient alternative to traditional, in-person therapy. For instance, a 2017 study found internet-based cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) to be a useful treatment for various mental health conditions, such as depression, anxiety, and obsessive-compulsive disorder. Aside from diagnosed mental health disorders, CBT can be helpful in addressing parenting challenges and other familial difficulties.

Takeaway

The relationship between parenting and child temperament can be a complex topic, and it’s the subject of ongoing research. Nevertheless, temperament and personality are typically viewed as two distinct concepts. Temperament, which normally includes inborn behavioral traits, may be just one possible component of personality, which can also be impacted by experiences, values, and beliefs. No two children are exactly the same, so children with different temperaments may benefit from differing parenting styles and approaches. This can be a confusing dynamic for parents to navigate, particularly if their children have difficult temperaments or personalities that differ greatly from their own. In these cases, a therapist can be a valuable resource, whether you prefer to attend sessions in person or online.