Reparenting Therapy
Many people have negative experiences from their childhood that they wish they could go back and change. While we can’t go back in time and change the past, certain types of therapy may allow you to adjust how your past is impacting you in the present, thus healing from those childhood wounds. One such type of therapy is called reparenting. This therapeutic treatment involves providing yourself with the type of parenting your own parents were unable to give you in childhood.
Understanding the inner child
What is reparenting therapy?
One of the key theories behind reparenting in therapy is transactional analysis. This theory suggests that internal communication between the different aspects of an individual's personality can affect their mental health. Therapists and clients can analyze these dynamics and work together to create healthier communication patterns within the individual.
Limited reparenting is also a key part of schema therapy. In schema therapy, limited reparenting hinges on the idea that an individual’s emotional needs were not met by their parents in childhood. To address this, the therapist can try to meet these needs, while maintaining appropriate boundaries.
Reparenting techniques and practices
In reparenting, therapists may take on the role of a supportive and caring figure. In this role, they can help clients relive and process past experiences that were traumatic or harmful while building secure attachments and trust in relationships. Through this approach, individuals are given the opportunity to heal unresolved emotional wounds and fulfill unmet needs from their past.
Some techniques and practices commonly used in reparenting therapy include:
- Inner child work: Identifying and exploring the thoughts, feelings, and needs of the individual's inner child, promoting self-compassion and understanding
- Mindfulness: Practicing focused, nonjudgmental awareness of the present moment, bringing attention to emotions and bodily sensations
- Rewards and affirmations: Encouraging positive behavior and self-worth by celebrating successes, accomplishments, and efforts with verbal praise or tangible rewards
- Communication skills development: Using exercises and role-playing to improve the individual's capacity for empathetic and effective communication
Reparenting can be a tool in coping with past traumas and improving mental health. It can help individuals grow and thrive as they create healthier communication patterns and stronger relationships.
Types and methods
There are several forms of reparenting therapy, each with different methods and goals. Below are some of the most widely known forms of reparenting therapy.
Self-reparenting
Self-reparenting is a type of reparenting therapy in which individuals take on the responsibility of nurturing and caring for their own inner child. This process involves recognizing the unmet needs from childhood and working to fulfill them in a healthy way. It might also encourage the client to focus on some of the positive aspects of the situation.
Spot reparenting
Total regression reparenting
Who is reparenting for?
Reparenting therapy may be a useful form of therapy for many people, but it may be especially suitable for those who have experienced trauma, neglect, or a lack of affection in their younger years. Some groups of people who might benefit most from reparenting therapy include:
People with childhood trauma
Reparenting therapy can be particularly helpful for individuals who have gone through specific traumatic events or ongoing challenges in their childhood. These situations could involve physical, sexual, or emotional abuse, for instance, or coping with a parent's addiction or mental illness. By undergoing reparenting therapy, these individuals can work on healing their emotional wounds and develop healthier ways to cope with past traumas.
If you or a loved one is experiencing abuse, contact the Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233). Support is available 24/7.
If you are experiencing trauma, support is available. Please see our Get Help Now page for more resources.
Those with unmet emotional needs
Unmet emotional needs may be another common reason people seek reparenting therapy. Some might feel that their parents didn't give them the necessary affection, security, or compassion during their upbringing, which may have led to a sense of emotional deprivation. Through reparenting therapy, individuals can learn to better understand and care for their emotional needs.
Individuals seeking personal growth
Getting started with reparenting therapy
Starting reparenting therapy can often involve several steps and practices, which can be followed independently or with a therapist’s guidance:
- Journaling and reflection: Journaling can be an important first step in reparenting therapy. It can help you identify your thoughts and emotions, process painful experiences, and understand how they have affected your life.
- Focus on positive aspects: During reparenting therapy, you might choose to concentrate on the positive aspects of your life and experiences. This might include acknowledging strengths, celebrating accomplishments, and recognizing areas for improvement. Recognizing and reinforcing positive aspects of yourself may help boost self-esteem and help promote healthy relationships.
- Practicing meditation: Adding meditation into your daily routine may complement your efforts in reparenting therapy. Meditation may help manage stress and promote self-awareness. It may also help you to connect with your inner child, which may lead to improved self-compassion and healing.
To get started with reparenting therapy, consider seeking guidance from a licensed therapist who specializes in the reparenting approach.
How online therapy can help
Research supporting online therapy
A growing body of research has demonstrated the effectiveness of online therapy for a range of conditions, including post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). One such study conducted a randomized controlled trial to evaluate the effectiveness of an internet-based therapy program for PTSD. It found that after receiving the online treatment, individuals in the treatment group experienced significant improvements in PTSD severity and other symptoms as well as a more significant reduction in levels of depression and anxiety.
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