Anger, Driving, And Impulse Control: How To Keep Your Cool On The Road
According to the AAA Foundation, nearly 80% of drivers expressed significant anger behind the wheel in the previous 30 days. Statistics like this are concerning because driving can be a necessary and convenient part of everyday life, allowing you to commute to work, run errands, or get away for vacations. In addition to its utility, driving may cause particularly frustrating situations, including sitting in traffic, navigating road work or distracted drivers, or getting lost.
You might be able to avoid certain dangerous driving behaviors by remaining calm and focused. This may help you avoid car accidents, road rage incidents, or mental health concerns. There may be risks to driving while angry or emotionally upset. Learning the risks of “anger driving” can be the first step to avoiding it. Keep reading to explore some tips to control road rage and learn how to find help from a professional who specializes in helping people with anger.
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What is road rage? How driving anger affects safety and decision-making
Road rage is a term that may refer to people exhibiting symptoms of anger while driving. This anger and subsequent aggressive driving could manifest in many ways, depending on the person and the situation. Road rage can cause people to drive faster, change lanes quickly, engage in risky behavior, or behave aggressively toward other road users. Anger tends to narrow attention, which can lead to major accidents and near accidents that affect others on the road.
Drivers who experience high levels of anger on the road drive 10 to 20 miles per hour over the speed limit on average. Road rage may lead to severe accidents, injury, or mental health challenges. However, managing road rage is often possible, especially with the help of a therapist who understands the causes of your anger.
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Find your matchCommon anger provoking situations on the road
Anger can arise from numerous situations when you’re on the road. For many people, traffic congestion can be a major cause of frustration. Even people who rarely experience challenges with anger control may find themselves frustrated by traffic obstructions that throw off their schedule.
What research says about driving anger
Research suggests that anger rumination may be related to high levels of trait anger. People who ruminate about anger may be more likely to react in anger to other drivers. While some people may experience a greater propensity to driving anger, there are evidence-based strategies to help mitigate anger and improve people’s reactions to it.
When driving anger becomes a bigger problem: How to manage anger while driving
Driving can be a safe and enjoyable experience with a healthy approach. The following tips might help you avoid aggressive driving and unhealthy expressions of anger on the road.
Give yourself enough time
A potential cause of anger while driving is feeling rushed due to a variety of factors, such as:
- Traffic
- Construction
- Other drivers
If you're short on time while driving to your destination, you may feel frustrated if you come across a situation that slows you down, which might cause you to drive in a more hurried, risky way.
Traffic is not always predictable, even if you're using an app. To adhere to traffic safety standards and avoid rushing, consider giving yourself a buffer. Look up the route you'll take ahead of time so that you know how long the drive will be, and then try to give yourself up to 40 minutes extra to arrive. You may have to plan your at-home schedule around this extra time. For example, try to shower earlier or put your clothes out for the day before you sleep at night.
Be understanding
At times, people make mistakes on the road. Your fellow drivers may be living with stress or could have experienced a temporary lapse. They may be a new driver or may be having a bad day.
Understanding that mistakes can happen may help you avoid feeling tense or angry when someone drives in a way that inconveniences you or puts you in danger. Try to think about driving as a community activity. You and your fellow motorists are trying to get to your destination, and you might help each other by being courteous and understanding on the road.
Avoid engaging with angry drivers
You might encounter a reckless, angry, or aggressive driver. Perhaps a motorist will drive aggressively near you or direct their displaced anger at you because of how you drove near them. When high-anger drivers do this, try not to engage. Responding to reckless driving, shouting, or gesturing with similar expressions of anger may escalate the situation and make it more hazardous.
If you're worried about aggressive drivers, you can avoid more risks by keeping plenty of distance between your car and theirs. You can slow down or safely exit to give yourself space. If necessary, alert the authorities that someone is driving recklessly, which may help keep others safe.
If someone leaves their car, threatens you with physical harm, makes you feel your life is at risk, or engages in any other dangerous behavior, contact the authorities by calling 911. Try not to leave your vehicle, and lock your car doors.
Avoid driving while already angry
If you're in a heightened state before getting behind the wheel, road rage could exacerbate your emotions and cause you to engage in riskier driving. Research suggests that driving while angry may drastically increase the likelihood of an accident.
If you're upset, you might give yourself time to control your emotions, even if it means being late. Try using anger management techniques to relax before leaving and start driving once you feel calmer.
Utilize relaxation methods in the car
Specific proven techniques for preventing unhealthy expressions of anger can be practiced in the car. For example, listening to calming music may improve the mood of those who experience anger while driving. Additionally, previous studies show that mindfulness practices can be done on the go.
Physical discomfort may translate to tension, so you might adjust your seat, mirrors, and steering wheel in a way that feels comfortable. You can also practice deep breathing and other techniques for overall anger management while you're driving.
Anger management techniques for everyday life
Many people who experience road rage or angry driving habits have trouble expressing their anger healthily in other parts of their lives. Developing anger management skills can not only help you drive safely but also help improve your:
- Relationships
- Career
- Overall mental health
Deep breathing
Focusing on your breath can help you quiet your mind, slow your heart rate, and relax. To practice deep breathing, sit or lie in a comfortable position, take a slow breath through your nose, and then release it slowly through your mouth. Deep breathing may be helpful because you can practice it in almost any setting.
Try to take deep breaths whenever you're stopped at a stoplight or behind another car. Doing so may help you manage your nervous system between bursts of driving.
Exercise
Physical activity can provide an avenue for you to release tension and mediate feelings of anger. Creating an exercise routine, joining a sports league, or going for a walk could reduce potentially anger-inducing stress.
Journaling
Putting your thoughts down on paper is often a healthy way of communicating your emotions. You can express disbelief, frustrations, and stressful thoughts in a safe, productive environment. Journaling may allow you to process your feelings and avoid manifesting them in problematic ways, such as road rage or excess anger in other situations.
Writing could also allow you to go back and identify potential triggers that may evoke more anger in the future.
Mindfulness
Mindfulness is often about focusing on the present moment by remaining aware of your thoughts, feelings, and surroundings. Mindfulness may help you slow down and recognize how your aggressive thinking affects you.
By drawing attention to the psychological factors, emotions, and environmental factors that may lead to unhealthy manifestations of anger, you can often learn to manage it better.
Managing anger through counseling
Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) is a widely accepted treatment that may help individuals identify and replace negative thought patterns that can lead to aggressive driving behaviors, such as unhealthy expressions of anger.
Online CBT may be beneficial if you're looking for a form of therapy that is easy to complete before or after work or something you can take with you to multiple locations. Research shows that online therapy can benefit those who want to learn about and manage their anger. In a study of the effects of internet-based cognitive-behavioral therapy on problematic anger, researchers found that even brief treatment can significantly decrease anger levels.
If you'd like help managing your anger levels or addressing related mental health concerns, consider contacting a therapist online. An online therapy platform like BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed mental health professional remotely through video and voice calling or in-app messaging. You won't have to worry about driving to and from an office, dealing with traffic, or sitting in a waiting room. An online therapist may help you express anger more effectively so that you can enjoy greater overall well-being.
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Takeaway
How do I stop being so angry when driving?
Practical tips for controlling anger when driving include the following:
- Try not to take things personally. Most drivers on the road with you are not making intentional decisions based on you as a person but instead are making decisions based on their own driving experience. Remembering this can quell the immediate emotional response.
- Drive defensively instead of offensively. Make your decisions based on managing the risks to yourself and your vehicle rather than trying to “head off” other drivers’ decisions.
- Talk to yourself. Talk yourself through your anger, out loud. Why am I upset? Is this a logical thing to get upset about? What can I do about it? As silly as it sounds, this can help you process those feelings safely rather than making risky decisions.
How do I stop being so angry?
Learning to recognize the signs of your anger can be a good first step toward overcoming it. When you recognize yourself becoming angry, consider stepping away from the situation to a calm, neutral location. Use calming techniques like deep breathing exercises to relax your mind and body. Then, when you are calm, review what it was that upset you and why that might have been. Journaling can help with this process.
In the long term, things like appropriate exercise, healthy sleep habits, and creative outlets may help you manage frustration before it becomes uncontrolled anger. Seeking professional help from a therapist may also help.
How do you control anger outbursts?
Some of the best ways to control outbursts are to back away from a situation before you become overwhelmed. Learn to recognize when you are becoming angry so that you can take the time you need to calm yourself and respond to a situation logically rather than purely emotionally.
When confronting others about situations that have caused you anger, try to use “I” statements—“I feel angry that you…”—rather than placing blame. This can help you communicate more effectively and lead to productive conversations rather than arguments.
Why am I always angry when driving?
Some experts suggest that driving is a high-stress situation that seems practically designed to incite anger. Driving is tense, as we are aware of the danger it presents, and it comes with many difficult-to-follow rules that can change depending on where you are or even without warning in the same place. Additionally, there are many barriers between us and our goal—getting to our destination—in the form of red lights, traffic signs, construction, traffic itself, and other drivers that we have trouble predicting. All of this can become frustrating and overwhelming quickly.
Can road rage be prevented?
While it may be difficult to completely eliminate road rage, there are things you can do to get ahead of it and make it less likely.
- Stay off the road if you are already upset, stressed, or tense.
- Make sure your drive is comfortable. Set the temperature in your car to a comfortable level, make sure the volume levels and kinds of sounds (music, podcasts, or silence) are to your liking, and ensure that all of your basic needs are met before you drive.
- Have a plan for road rage. Give yourself a series of steps to follow if you do end up upset while driving.
- Give the other drivers some grace. Remember that they are human and bound to make mistakes, and forgive them for this in advance.
Why do I rage so easily?
Some people have a lower tolerance for stress and tension than others do. It may be that you have a low tolerance or are prone to strong emotional reactions in general. This is natural and can be managed with some of the tips given above. Certain mental health challenges can also cause a lowered tolerance.
What mental illness causes anger outbursts?
Intermittent explosive disorder, or IED, is a mental health condition that is characterized by repeated, sudden, and intense episodes of impulsiveness, aggression, and violent or verbally angry outbursts. These episodes are considered wildly disproportionate to their triggers and can cause significant distress to the person or those around them.
What are the signs of aggressive driving?
Some of the signs of aggressive driving may include:
- Speeding, especially in areas of heavy traffic
- Tailgating, cutting into traffic, and passing inappropriately
- Weaving through traffic at speed
- Not signaling
- Deliberately blocking other drivers
- Flashing headlights from directly behind another vehicle
What is angry driving called?
Many people call angry driving "road rage." Others may reserve the term road rage for times when someone loses their temper with other drivers, which could lead to traffic violations or accidents.
What is the root cause of aggressive driving?
The root cause of aggressive driving may be unresolved anger from other life situations. Some people may experience anger related to past trauma, which may lead to unintended aggression. In other cases, a person may engage in unsafe driving behavior as a result of job stress. Regardless of the reason,
Are young drivers more prone to road rage?
Younger drivers and men tend to be more likely to experience road rage, according to a survey by the AAA Foundation for Traffic Safety. However, age and gender differences don't always matter, as anyone can engage in hostile gestures, aggressive behaviors, and illegal driving. This could lead to aggressive violations that come with heavy fines.
How do I calm my road rage quickly?
To calm your road rage quickly, consider pulling over your car to a safe place to engage in some deep breathing exercises. You might combine these with some visualization, which typically involves imagining a calming scenario.
When should I seek professional help for driving anger?
You might consider seeking professional help for driving angry if you are at all concerned about how your emotions are affecting you. You don’t have to wait until you have an incident of driving aggression to seek support. A licensed counselor may be able to help you address anger to improve your emotional and physical well-being.
For more information on behavior research, anger, and driving, read the following study on trait driving anger and the driving anger scale:
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