Anger Articles

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Looking for healthy ways to help your spouse manage their anger? Read on.

Managing anger is a skill that can be learned, much like effective communication or dealing with difficult people. Learning to control extreme emotions can be very important, preventing you from saying something you'll later regret or making poor decisions in the heat of the moment. Many times anger is the symptom of deeper feelings such as rejection, regret, or disappointment. Everybody gets angry from time to time, but letting your emotions control you is largely a matter of choice. Anger management techniques can be adopted by anyone in order to live a happier, better regulated life.

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Anger is a complex emotion that can range in intensity and affect you and those around you. While anger can be a healthy response to certain situations, knowing how to control and express your angry feelings can be vital for more positive outcomes. Not knowing how to manage your anger can make situations worse, cause you to do or say things you don’t mean, or lead to physical and mental health concerns. Exploring more about anger can help you understand the potential root of your anger, learn how to cope with it, and help you determine when it’s time to seek support. 

What Is Anger?

Anger is an emotion that you might feel when you think someone has intentionally harmed you or someone you love. These feelings are often negative in nature and may cause you to behave in a number of ways. 

Everyone gets angry from time to time and it’s okay to express these feelings. In most cases, it can be unproductive to be ashamed of your anger since it’s a natural emotion and response to life’s different situations and stressors. This being said, anger can become an issue when you find yourself getting angry a lot of the time, and you can’t seem to control your temper. It can be especially important to realize when you are frequently misplacing your anger onto people who do not deserve it. 

With any mental health issue, it can be essential to find support when you recognize that you have a problem on your hands. You can learn to manage your anger with the right treatment, which could include counseling, medication, at-home techniques, and more. A professional can help you understand why you’re experiencing so much anger and where it may be stemming from. They can also determine whether your anger may be a symptom of a mental health condition like bipolar disorder, depression, or borderline personality disorder. From there, they can help you come up with a treatment plan to overcome your anger issues.

Understanding Anger

Different people, situations, and environments can make us angry in life. Maybe someone isn’t treating you well in your family, your job is toxic, or you’re in a romantic relationship where your partner does things that increase your stress levels.  You may become mad after getting fired from a job or because of a traumatic event you experienced. You could feel angry after a bad breakup or a divorce. People become angry when they think they are being mistreated or their feelings are not valued. Anger could also be the result of a mental illness, indicating that something is wrong. Finding ways to express your anger appropriately and constructively can be vital to nurturing healthy relationships and feeling at peace within yourself. 

Expressing Anger

The way we express anger is partially influenced by the way we were raised. Imagine that you grew up in a household where people yelled and broke things to show their displeasure. As an adult, you might believe that this is an appropriate way to express your anger. Despite hurting those around you, you may not know any other way to get your feelings across without acting in this way. 

Other people have learned how to manage their anger well. They can sense when something or someone is going to make them mad and can proactively take steps to calm themselves down. They might take a deep breath, walk away, count to 10, or observe their physiological symptoms rather than react immediately. Typically, they take a moment to process their feelings and then respond to the situation.

Learning To Communicate Anger In A Healthy Way

It can be important to learn healthy ways to express your anger to others. Sometimes people struggle to understand their emotions, and they snap. Their anger goes from level zero to 100 seemingly in an instant. It can feel frustrating when your anger comes out explosively. Learning different anger management techniques can help you slow down and cope with your feelings rather than letting them get the best of you. You may be able to apply these strategies on your own, or you might need assistance from a licensed professional.

Online Counseling With BetterHelp

In order to get help with anger issues, it can be vital to recognize that you have them and understand to what extent they’re impacting your life. Confiding in a counselor can help you address your emotions and work through them in a productive way. You can identify what causes your anger and learn new coping techniques that allow you to express your feelings in a healthier manner. Anger can stem from sensitive subjects that may be difficult to discuss with a therapist face-to-face. 

Online therapy may give you the privacy you need to feel more comfortable opening up. You can check out the database of online counselors at BetterHelp and find one who is right for you. Many specialize in anger issues and can help you through the unique obstacles you’re facing. You can speak to a qualified therapist who is affordable, remain anonymous, and communicate from a secure location of your choice. 

The Efficacy Of Online Counseling 

Everyday anger management can be an effective form of treatment, but online counseling can also be beneficial. Researchers from the Centre for Psychiatry Research at Karolinska Institutet in Sweden conducted a study on anger and online treatment. They found that “four weeks of therapy delivered over the internet can help people with anger and aggression.”


Anger is a natural emotion but having too much of it can leave you feeling out of control. People get angry for different reasons and are impacted by these intense emotions to different extents. Anger management can be vital to living a healthy life, and you can learn new coping techniques alongside a therapist. Online therapy can provide you with the comfort and security you need to open up about your anger issues and develop a healthier mindset. It can take time to learn how to manage your anger effectively, but there is no time limit or rush on your healing.


The information on this page is not intended to be a substitution for diagnosis, treatment, or informed professional advice. You should not take any action or avoid taking any action without consulting with a qualified mental health professional. For more information, please read our terms of use.
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