22 Examples Of Body Language Attraction
Updated May 20, 2020
Reviewer Deborah Horton
One of the most important things to understand when facing the single dating world is body language attraction. Knowing when your date or a person of interest is attracted to you is important for knowing whether or not you are wasting your time. Sometimes someone might be polite and not want to let you down harshly, but their body language will tell you that they are not interested in a romantic liaison.
Body language attraction does differ somewhat between men and women. Some forms of body language attraction are strictly things that women do, and there are things that strictly men do. However, there are also a great many forms of body language attraction that are common among both sexes. Also, depending on gender identity and sexual orientation, there may be some crossover between the sexes.
Women Body Language Attraction
Women show their attraction to a man through body language. You can tell if a woman is attracted to you by the way she holds her body and what she does with her hands. Scientific studies have shown that women are most attracted to men whose body language exudes dominance and masculinity. They answer this intern with body language that shows submissiveness and fertility.
Body language attraction has much to do with sexual attraction, which is related to fertility. When a woman is attracted to a man, she will show signs of fertility. This may be done in some ways. She may keep or take her hair down, tilt her head to expose pheromones, or keep hands and wrists visible to display the soft skin there.
How a woman holds her purse can tell you a lot about how she is engaged and whether or not she is attracted to you. If a woman is feeling uncomfortable or isn't attracted to who she is talking to, she might clutch her purse in her lap up against her body. On the other hand, when a woman is attracted to someone, she wants her purse out of the way for further interaction and may place it on the table or the floor, or on a chair behind her. Keep in mind that if you are in a crowded secure place she may keep her purse clutched to her for security reasons, and this may not be a good indication of interest.
Women will frequently lick their lips when they are attracted to someone. They may do this intentionally to show interest, but frequently it is a reflexive movement that they may not even be aware that they are doing. It could be that they sweep the tongue over the lips, or it could be a quick flick of the lips with the tongue, which may be barely noticeable. Combined with constant eye contact, this is a sure sign that the woman is extremely attracted to you.
A woman who is sexually attracted to someone will frequently stand with one hip thrust out, and possibly a shoulder lifted up. This stance shows off the woman's body and is a sort of invitation. The one hip thrust out opens up the lower body and brings attention to fertility, while the shoulder lift brings attention to the breasts. This is usually consciously done by the woman to show interest, but it may also be unconscious.
Men Body Language Attraction
Men have their way of showing attraction to a woman. Generally, men who are attracted to a woman may be perceived as showing off or preening in a masculine way to try to impress the woman. Their body language attraction also includes gestures and movements that are very suggestive of what it is that they hope to happen with the woman in question.
Like women, men are likely to show off their fertility when they are attracted to a woman. They may stand up straight, square off the shoulders, and plant their feet slightly more than shoulder-width apart. This open but dominant stance shows off their body and shows their confidence in their sexual prowess. They may also open their hands and show their palms in invitation.
Men will frequently raise their eyebrows when they are attracted to someone. It is typically seen as a sort of invitation to more interaction, or a suggestion of something more to come after the official date. It may be a slow raising of the eyebrows, or it could be a quick eyebrow flash where one eyebrow goes up quickly and then comes back down. Some men do this intentionally, but it can also be a subconscious sign of attraction.
Men do not lick their lips as women do, but they may part their lips briefly when they make eye contact with a woman that they are attracted to. This could be prolonged or brief and usually accompanies eye contact or some other noticing of attraction in the other person.
Flared nostrils and open expression in a man's face is a sure sign that he is fully engaged in the interaction. This shows that the man is very interested in the conversation or what is going on between him and the other person. Flared nostrils can also be a sign of physical, sexual attraction. This is usually a subconscious body language attraction.
Stand with Hands On Hips
A man who stands with his hands on his hips is very attracted to the woman he is talking to. This may be a conscious or subconscious body language. The hands on the hips present an open view of his body, as sort of an invitation to the other person. The hands may be pointed toward his package for emphasis. Another similar sign of attraction is sitting with legs open or adjusting himself while standing.
Gender Neutral Body Language Attraction
There are a great many forms of body language attraction that is common regardless of gender or sexual orientation. If you see these signs of body language from someone that you are on a date with, you can be certain that the date is going well, and they are very interested in further interaction.
Men and women both are more attracted to people who show that they are available, and men and women both tend to show their availability when they are interested in getting to know someone better. Showing availability could be having an open posture with arms uncrossed and legs uncrossed. Men and women will also show availability by looking upward at the face of the other person rather than down at their feet, the table, or their phone.
Smiling is another way that men and women show their availability. Smiling is also a way to show interest and attraction to another person. Some smiles can be forced to make a good impression or to try to appear attractive. However, if the smile is genuine, it will be obvious, and the smile will also reach their eyes. If a person is genuinely smiling at you and cannot seem to do anything but smile, they are attracted to you.
When people are engaged with interactions with others, they lean in toward that person. If you are in a group of people and someone leans in toward you specifically, it shows that they are attracted to you and paying more attention to you than others. The closer he or she leans in toward you, the more attracted they are.
Tilting the head is body language attraction that shows engagement and interest. When someone tilts their head during a conversation, it means that they are paying attention and care about what is being said. If someone is attracted to you, they will tilt their head to show their interest and engagement. Women are more prone to head tilting than men, but both sexes do use this body language.
Flushed Or Blushed
When someone is physically attracted to someone else, they will become flushed or begin blushing. As the attraction grows, blood rushes to the face making one look flushed. This is not something that either sex can control. It is a natural body language that the body does on its own when someone is physically attracted to a person. The lips may also become redder, and the eyes whiter and brighter.
Heart Rate Increase
This is another unconscious and automatic response when someone is attracted to another person. Your heart rate will increase. You probably don't want to try to take someone's pulse while on a date or in a bar to see if they are attracted to you, but there are other signs. A quickening of the breath and warmness to the palms are indications of an increased heart rate and attraction.
People will automatically point their feet in the direction of their interest. While someone's feet pointing toward you isn't a sure sign of attraction, it does mean that they are at least interested in the interaction and present at the moment. If their feet are pointed toward the exit, they are probably thinking about getting out of the situation.
When someone makes eye contact with you, it is a sure sign of interest. Eye contact means that they are paying attention to only you, and you can be certain that you have their interest. Prolonged eye contact is a sure sign that they are attracted to you and interested in what you have to offer them. On the other hand, if you are talking to someone and their eyes shift focus frequently, they may not be fully engaged in the interaction.
Just as when the feet point toward what you are interested in, the same is true of the rest of your body. If someone is interested in you and fully engaged in the conversation, they will likely be facing you head on. Their body may be tilted slightly off center for comfort, but for the most part, they will be facing your direction with their whole body, and not just their face or feet.
Speed Of Movement
The speed with which you move or shift your body says a lot about your mood. When you move slowly and deliberately, it shows that you are extremely confident and attracted. When movements are fast and jerky, it shows that the person is extremely nervous and may not be confident in the situation.
Touching the hair can be a sure sign of attraction, but it can also be a sign of nervousness and being uncomfortable. If a man sweeps his whole hand through his hair, it usually shows that he is interested and kind of preening for the woman. If a woman is lightly twirling her hair or playing with the ends, while displaying other signs of attraction, it can be a sure way to know that she is attracted to you. However, often women will touch and play with their hair when they are nervous, uncomfortable, or even scared, so it is best not to use this body language alone to base your opinions.
The accident-not-an-accident touch is a sure sign that someone is attracted to you. If someone reaches out and intentionally touches you, even if it is seemingly innocent like just the briefest touch of a hand or the arm, it shows that they are interested. Likewise, when men touch a woman's elbow or the small of her back to guide her, such as from the table to the dance floor, it is a sure sign of attraction.
Mirroring is when someone copies the movements of the person they are engaged with. It usually happens quite subconsciously. The person may copy movements of shifting body weight or taking up a similar posture or pose, or they might copy someone's movements of touching their face or playing with the straw on their drink. This is a sure sign of attraction, and that the person is completely engaged in the interaction.
Getting Help With Body Language
If you have been on the dating scene for some time and are still single or have been running into problems where people say you are giving mixed signals, it could be that your body is giving signals that you are not aware of. Sometimes the body will show body language reflexively that is against what we think we want in our minds.
It could be that you do not want what you think you do. Your body could be betraying your real feelings about dating. One way to conquer this problem is to visit a therapist. A therapist can help you examine your real reasons for dating and whether or not you are emotionally ready for a relationship. This way when you are ready for a relationship, your body language, and your conscious language will match, and you will have an easier time making a connection.