What’s The Definition Of A True Friend? Characteristics Of Friendship

Medically reviewed by Andrea Brant, LMHC and Corey Pitts, MA, LCMHC, LCAS, CCS
Updated February 9th, 2026 by BetterHelp Editorial Team

Whether a friendship is new or old, there may be times when we need to assess whether someone is a true friend or simply a companion. Each friendship is unique; some may be more casual in nature, while others may be deep, lifelong relationships. Learning to recognize a true friend can be crucial for ensuring our social circle consists of supportive, understanding, mutually beneficial relationships. 

Here, we’ll explore the nature of true friendship so you can recognize when a friend relationship may be worth investing in. We’ll also cover how to find and maintain friendships so you can build and strengthen your connections with others.

Finding the right therapist isn’t just important – it’s everything.

Find your match

What is a true friend?

A true friend is someone who consistently shows up for you, supporting your well-being and personal growth.

A simple definition of true friendship

True friends are those who: 

  • Offer you support
  • Improve your quality of life
  • Promote self-confidence
  • Provide honesty and unconditional love
  • Help you progress mentally
A true friendship has a sense of shared respect and reliability. In time, you realize that not only is this person there for you whenever you need them, but that you also share a genuine, mutual connection. The fact that you can be honest with one another and have a relationship without pretense demonstrates the strength of your bond.

Why true friendship feels different

In a healthy friendship, both parties can feel free to be themselves without fear of judgment, allowing them to feel comfortable and secure in each other’s presence. True friends typically prioritize quality time together, as well as consistent communication. There is no question that the person feels the same way about your relationship and makes an effort to stay present in your life.

Core qualities of a true friend

Understanding the meaning and definition of true friendship often requires patience and tolerance. Having a real friend can provide comfort, safety, and companionship

Here are some benefits of having true friends.

Loyalty and consistency

Having true friends can mean having an effective support system. True friends generally stick around during difficult times and walk beside you during life’s challenges, even if you are in different places in your lives.

Honest communication

A real friend can be honest with you, even when what they have to say may be hard for you to hear. They can talk freely with you as your relationship has reached a point where they may feel comfortable telling you things you may not necessarily want to hear. For example, a true friend may let you know if they notice that your partner seems to be treating you poorly or if your new job seems to be bringing you down. This authenticity and honesty can contribute to a realistic perspective of life.

Kindness and support

True friendship may be defined as mutual, unconditional love, expressed with encouragement and kindness. This can be a different type of love than you might receive from your family or your partner. Real friends may show unconditional love and expect nothing in return. They may not judge you or think less of you. They will likely always have your back and support you through thick and thin.

Trust without jealousy

True friendships are built on trusting one another, not being jealous, full of doubt, or afraid of losing the relationship. Because these relationships are built on mutual respect, both people can feel respected and confident in the stability of the friendship.

How true friends support personal growth

True friends can support personal development by helping you feel safe and supported. Rather than holding you back or making you feel guilty for wanting to better yourself, a true friend will encourage progress.

Encouraging dreams and goals

If you have a dream, a true friend will take it seriously, even if it feels like it’s out of reach. They will cheer you on, celebrate your progress, and help you through roadblocks when they happen.

Helping each other through setbacks

When something doesn’t go as planned, a true friend can offer perspective and help you realize that setbacks are part of the process. When you need it, they can give you the bit of encouragement you need to keep moving forward.

69%
of BetterHelp clients use
one or more self care & clinical tools
Source: State of Stigma Report, May 2025
Most used tools
Worksheets
Goal & habit tracking
Journal
Support groups
Classes

True friendship across time and distance

Proximity doesn’t define true friendship. A true friendship will stay strong and connected, no matter where life takes you. As life and responsibilities change, they adapt rather than fade away.

Staying connected through life changes

Life can take friends down different paths. College, families, and careers can put friends in different places, making it challenging to hang out in person the way they once did. True friends change their expectations while maintaining connections, sticking by one another through differing stages of life, no matter where they are.

Showing up when it matters most

True friends stay present, even from afar. They will continue to walk alongside one another emotionally, even when they are not physically together. In true friendships, being present, supportive, and putting effort into the relationships are more important than physical proximity.

Signs someone may not be a true friend

Not every long-term acquaintance or relationship is healthy. Knowing how to identify patterns that are draining or unsafe can help you avoid relationships that may negatively impact your emotional well-being.

Lack of support or empathy

When someone disappears when you need them or isn’t around in difficult times, it can not only make you doubt the relationship but also make you afraid to rely on them. If someone treats you with a lack of empathy or minimizes what you’re going through, it may be a sign that the relationship isn’t giving you the support you need.

Some signs to look out for may include:

  • They are not there for you during difficult moments
  • They minimize or dismiss your feelings
  • They quickly bring the conversation back to themselves
  • They don't take accountability when they do something that upsets you

Patterns of jealousy or negativity

Having a relationship with someone who behaves in a jealous or negative way can erode trust and limit growth. Eventually, these relationships can reach a point where the other person undermines your confidence, criticizes your actions, or tries to compete with you, signaling that the relationship is not beneficial to your well-being.

Patterns of jealousy and negativity may include: 

  • They are jealous of your accomplishments
  • They criticize your successes instead of celebrating them
  • They compete with you
  • They focus on your flaws and mistakes

Why true friendship is a rare gift

True friendship can have a lasting impact on your life, offering companionship as well as shaping your mental and emotional well-being. 

The emotional value of real connection

True friendship can have a profound impact on physical and mental health, bolstering well-being in ways that other relationships may not. A genuine platonic connection is rare, deeply meaningful, and can be seen as a blessing that provides lifetime trust, support, and understanding.  

How true friends help us become better people

True friends can help us grow by encouraging reflection, offering compassion, and holding us accountable. They challenge us, support us, and help us realize that we are not alone. Because of shared experiences and support, true friendship may inspire you or help you feel empowered to seek paths that you may have been wary of traveling alone.

How therapy can help you build healthier friendships

Online therapy can provide a valuable tool for individuals looking to build stronger relationships with their friends. With the help of a licensed therapist, individuals can explore their emotions, thoughts, and behaviors and learn how they may impact their relationships with their friends. By developing self-awareness and better communication skills, individuals can foster a deeper and more meaningful connection with their friends, potentially leading to stronger and more fulfilling friendships. Online therapy provides a convenient and available way for individuals to prioritize their mental and emotional well-being while also working toward building a better relationship with those they care about.

Understanding friendship patterns

Working with a therapist can help you get a better sense of what you need in your friendships and seek people who meet those needs.  By developing self-awareness and better communication skills, individuals can foster a deeper and more meaningful connection with their friends, potentially leading to stronger and more fulfilling friendships. Online therapy provides a convenient and available way for individuals to prioritize their mental and emotional well-being while also working toward building a better relationship with those they care about.

Learning to communicate and connect

A therapist can also help you learn how to improve your communication skills and learn how to talk to other people in an effective way. Strong relationships rely on open, honest communication. A therapist can offer steady encouragement and support, helping you gain confidence in your friendships.

Therapy that fits your life

Flexible, accessible, and built around you

Subscriptions range from $70–$100 per week, billed weekly or monthly
  • Transparent pricingNo hidden fees, know what you’ll pay upfront
  • Fast matchingYou can get matched in as little as 48 hours
  • In-App SchedulingMessage, chat, or schedule live video
  • Easy to switchChange therapists anytime until you find the right fit
  • Tailored supportCredentialed professionals with diverse specialties

Get started

Pricing is based on factors such as your location, referral source, preferences, therapist availability and any applicable discounts or promotions that might apply.

Takeaway

Although it typically takes an investment of time and effort to cultivate healthy friendships, it’s usually worth it. True friends may improve your quality of life, help you progress mentally, promote healthy self-confidence, offer unconditional love and honesty, and provide unwavering support. Joining groups and clubs in your community can be an excellent way to find new friends who share your values and interests. You may also find it helpful to work with an online therapist to learn more about healthy friendships and how to be a good friend to others.
Seeking to improve your mental health?
The information on this page is not intended to be a substitution for diagnosis, treatment, or informed professional advice. You should not take any action or avoid taking any action without consulting with a qualified mental health professional. For more information, please read our terms of use.
Get the support you need from one of our therapistsGet started