Why Do I Have No Life?
By Mason Komay
Updated March 24, 2020
Reviewer April Brewer , DBH, LPC
Do you feel like you've hit a point in your life where you spend most evenings sitting at home alone? Does it seem as though life just isn't what it used to be? This doesn't necessarily mean that you have no life, but perhaps you've lost touch with what once made it great. It's common to go through a stagnant period in your social life when you've gone through changes, such as graduating from college or moving to a new place. Perhaps you're experiencing loneliness despite living near friends and family. Whatever your situation, read on to discover how you can get your life back.
I Have No Life Purpose
You may feel like you're just drifting through life with nothing truly important to do, almost as if you have no purpose to drive you. Believe it or not, that's okay. It can often be overwhelming to think that you need to focus your life on some big end goal.
Instead of feeling bummed because you're not sure about your life's purpose, try asking yourself a simpler question. Ask "What would be a good use of my time?" instead. You'll find it much easier to answer to this one. In fact, there may be several activities that you would enjoy. You can break these down into smaller, more manageable goals instead of having a single life purpose.
It's alright if you have no idea what activities mean the most to you right now. Don't let your age dictate how you feel; we all change as we go through life. Whether you're 25, 40, or even 70-years-old, don't paralyze yourself with the fear that you aren't fulfilling some prewritten destiny. Enjoy trying new things and discovering which ones bring meaning to your life. After all, life is not meant to be a straight line from beginning to end. You may have different purposes at different stages, so don't worry about changing your mind at any age.
Fear can stop people from living the life they desire. Maybe you tried something new and fell flat on your face. It could be that you lost someone you cared about the last time you took a risk. There are many reasons why fear begins to influence people over time. It can cause you to shy away from people, avoid trying new hobbies, or stop doing things you used to enjoy. It can often be difficult to overcome this fear because few people realize that the fear itself is the root of the problem.
No matter why you feel like your life is meaningless, you can always take action and make a change. The following tips will show you how you can start living life to the fullest again, even if you lack the motivation to do so.
If you're feeling stuck, you might be focusing too much time and energy on yourself. If you aren't sure how to spend your time, try looking for organizations where you can volunteer. Pick a cause that means something to you. If you find fulfillment in helping animals, volunteer at the local animal shelter. If you care about helping children, consider becoming a mentor through an organization like Big Brother Big Sister. If you want to put an end to homelessness, then head over to a shelter, and find out how you can help. Better yet, consider starting your own program.
The important thing is to find something that gets you out of your house and encourages you to be around other people. Then, you'll start making connections with other people who have similar interests and passions.
Reconnect with Old Friends
Instead of making new friends, you might find it easier to reconnect with old ones. Sometimes, we lose contact with people simply because we're busy. If you've lost touch with some of your close friends, think about reconnecting with them. Give them a call or send a text, and see if they want to meet for coffee. Conversations with old friends tend to be relatively easy because you have shared experiences, so at the very least you can reminisce about the good times.
Let Go of Old Friendships When You Need To
Sometimes holding on to old friendships can keep us from forming new ones. If your old friends have moved on to a different stage of life, then it might be time to move on. It's okay to accept that your old friendships aren't what they used to be. You can cherish the fond memories, but don't let that stop you from going out and making new friends.
Get Off the Internet
If you feel alone and as though you have no friends, stop spending so much time on the internet. It's commonly used as a Band-Aid for people who feel lonely, but it only gives us the illusion of contact with others. Forty-two percent of the global population uses some form of social media, but that doesn't mean you have to succumb to it on a daily basis. You can start weaning yourself off the internet slowly by experimenting with offline hobbies. The idea is to pull yourself away from the temporary comfort and dopamine that the internet offers. See what it's like to find pleasure in the real world. In other words, try to engage your mind instead of distracting it.
Overcome Social Anxiety
Once you get used to satisfying your loneliness offline, you'll almost certainly find it easier to branch out and discover activities that put you in the same vicinity as other people. At this point, you can try talking to someone you don't know. Practice your conversation skills in low-stakes situations with people like grocery store clerks, librarians, or even bank tellers. As you find activities you enjoy and practice conversations, you'll eventually feel more comfortable in social situations.
Find a Meetup Group
Meetup can help you discover a group of people who share your interests. It could be a group that meets to go running, paddle boarding, or hiking. Perhaps you'll find a group that attends plays or even goes to dinner. You can find organizations like this in cities all around the country. If you've just moved to a new city, it's a fun and easy way to meet new people and become more socially active.
It may sound weird, but meditation can help you get back in touch with who you are as a person. With a consistent meditation practice, you can dramatically reduce brain fog by enhancing your state of consciousness. When you stimulate your mind in a healthy way, you may find yourself more willing and motivated to engage with life.
Read a Book
Approximately 76 percent of American adults have read at least one book in the past year. While there's nothing wrong with watching a little TV or YouTube every now and then, it's far more beneficial to spend some time reading. A good book can be educational and entertaining, but it can also inspire you to go out and live your own adventures.
Talk to a Therapist
Sometimes people feel like they have no life because they've experienced something that caused them to mentally shut down. Maybe you've gone through a traumatic or painful situation that made you want to isolate yourself from family and friends. Alternatively, you might be struggling with anxiety and depression.
A licensed therapist can help you discover the root of the problem. They can also help you take the proper steps to recover from it, so you can get your life back. Consider talking to a professional counselor for guidance. You only have one life to live, so don't waste it when help is available. Read below for reviews of counselors, from people experiencing similar issues.
"Marysue has been a great support to my path of self-discovery and healing. She is kind, patient, professional and above all a pleasant human being that cares. Thank you."
"Julie has been absolutely amazing. She has listened to my concerns, helped me to feel supported and less alone while I navigate unfamiliar waters with a situation I have never faced before. She is easy to talk to and comforting as well as encouraging and positive. I am so grateful for the time she has put into our professional relationship and all of the advice she has given me. She has helped me to start to feel like myself again."
How do I know if I have no life?
Lots of times, most people look at social media way too much when they have no life. Social media is usually a means for you to cope with feeling like you're not doing anything.
If you constantly feel like you're bored, or you feel like life is purposeless, then chances are you're not really living life.
Many times, you feel bored with anything, and even doing things that used to be a fun time for you tend to be boring. While you might not feel suicidal, you usually are incredibly bored, and also very depressed as well.
You oftentimes feel like your life doesn't matter. It does, but the idea that it doesn't matter is constantly hanging around you, that you're just existing. When you're not doing anything and sitting around at home all the time, you'll oftentimes feel like it doesn't matter, and just existing alone is better for you.
Some frequently asked questions that you can ask yourself to determine whether you have a life are the following:
- Do you wake up every day excited or dreading it?
- Do you feel high highs or low lows?
- Do you always feel down?
- Does the idea of being alone without talking to others seem easier to deal with?
- Do you look at social media like it's a drug?
- Do you tend to surround yourself with things that entertain you, only to feel massively bored?
If you find yourself answering yes to these frequently asked questions, then it might be time to look at different ways to improve your life.
Is it OK to have no social life?
This is one of the many frequently asked questions. A social life is important. While some of us tend to be introverted, completely shutting yourself away from others is definitely not one of the smart decisions.
For many in the United States, and with the age of the internet, more and more people are spending time alone. But, having no social life is different from social isolation.
Most people are happier if they spend at least a little bit of time with others, and if you're scared to, there are treatment options out there. There are various health resources to help you overcome your social anxiety.
But, a lot of people prefer working alone than being encumbered by others. Introverts especially prefer their time alone. But, it's important to understand that while having no social life is okay, it can oftentimes be better if you at least get out there a little bit, which is why many treatment options include getting over the fears and getting out to see others.
If your fear for others causes major issues such as eating disorders, then definitely see someone to help.
There are also many suicide prevention options out there for you to check out.
How do I get a life?
There are of course many treatment options out there to help you. If you feel depressed, there are suicide prevention options for you to consider, and different health resources if you are depressed.
You can get a life by speaking with someone, and there are different peer support options. Finding groups for example is a good one. In the united states, there are various groups for just about any hobby, and it can be quite helpful for you.
This is one of the frequently asked questions since most people don't know where to begin. If they've been isolated for far too long, oftentimes this is hard to start with. But you can start in ways that make you happy.
Finding hobbies is a good one. Peer support, especially for those with similar hobbies is a good start. Helping children by volunteering is another way. Helping children will also make you happier and can help reduce risk factors for both depression and anxiety, and it's a good suicide prevention activity.
For those who seek out lesbian, gay options, you can always go to a club, or maybe to an outing with other out people. In the united states, there are many lesbian gay support groups too you can check out. These people may be allies, but they can help you realize that you're indeed not alone
Why do I have no life?
This is another one of the frequently asked questions people have. Sometimes, it's because you're just busy.
You've been focused on other things rather than just seeing others.
Other times, it's depression. Lots of times, one of the ways people cope with depression is through isolation. But, one suicide prevention thing to keep in mind is to at least get some socialization out there. You'll realize that with these different actions, you'll feel better.
BetterHelp may also help you answer one of these frequently asked questions. They have been around for many years, and they can help you with anything. From helping you get the motivation to get the copyright, all rights reserved on your book or media, to even helping you with suicide prevention, they're here to help. They can help you get that spark back and motivate you in life.
You also may have no life because you've suffered a loss. Another one of the frequently asked questions people have when someone's dealing with this, is has there been a loss. Depression and loss are oftentimes very common for people who have no life, so it's very important.
What is having a life?
Having a life is having a purpose, having a reason to keep going, and having something to do. It's one of the key suicide prevention means, and it's something that'll help you get on the right track to living better.
This is another one of the frequently asked questions because usually people don't know where to begin. But it's understanding that you have a reason for existing, a reason to get up in the morning, and doing things.
While you may not have that much of a social life, having a life where you're doing things that make you happy is super important, and you need to understand that, if you don't have that, that can be a problem for many.
What do people mean when they say get a life?
Usually, they mean you get off social media and off the computer, and go do something, but in general, it means to go out and do things which make you happy and excited. It means doing something productive and something that'll make you feel good.
It basically means doing something productive with your existence, not just sitting around like a bump on a log.
What to do if you have no plans?
Sometimes, you might not have plans, and while it might be tempting to wallow around in doom and gloom and look at social media all night, there's a lot of great ways to entertain yourself.
If you have no plans, go out. Sometimes doing things on your own is healthy. Even just going out to a bar might be good for you.
Possibly consider getting into a different hobby. Game streaming is a good way to get social interaction and have fun if you like to play video games.
Maybe try reaching out to someone and see if they want to hang out.
Sometimes just getting out and doing things by yourself is a good thing, and it can be fun for you. Remember, life's what you make of it, and it's what you'll do for yourself. You should learn to make your own plans, have your own fun, and don't hold yourself back.
If you never do have plans, you can always join support groups and other places. Even just meeting once a week is a great way to get the social interaction that you desire.
You deserve to enjoy your life, and you can get through this. If you need support, our counselors are here for you. Let us help you discover your purpose. Take the first step today.