How To Handle Unwanted Emotions

Sometimes, when we feel certain emotions that make us uncomfortable, we might want to do anything to escape them. Have you wished that you could get rid of anger, frustration, sadness, or regret? The truth is that many of our emotions are there for a reason, and even if an emotion feels “bad” to us, it may have something to tell us. Sometimes, a useful way to “get rid” of emotions that we don't want might be to switch our perspective, so we understand them for what they really are and can then release them. 

Here, we’ll explore the relationship between thoughts and feelings, how to address your emotions in a healthy way, and how to find additional help. 

How To Address Your Emotions In A Healthy Way

Feeling intense, unwanted emotions can be uncomfortable, but there are strategies you can use to try to manage them. Below, we'll discuss tips for handling your emotions in healthy ways. Some of these may work better for you than others, so you may consider trying some of these suggestions or other ideas to figure out what might work best for you. 

1. Write Down Your Emotions

Sometimes, the simple act of writing your thoughts and feelings down can produce relief. So, you might try setting aside time each day for you to write about your emotions, even just a couple of sentences or for a few minutes, to release what you are thinking and feeling onto paper.

This can serve the immediate purpose of transferring your thoughts and feelings from your head onto paper. You may notice a reduction in both the volume and intensity of unwanted thoughts and feelings throughout the rest of your day as a result of this exercise. Sometimes, just knowing that you can return later to what you have written if you choose, may allow you to leave them on paper for the time being. You may also use such writing to process and better understand what you're thinking and feeling. 

How To Address Your Emotions In A Healthy Way

Feeling intense, unwanted emotions can be uncomfortable, but there are strategies you can use to try to manage them. Below, we'll discuss tips for handling your emotions in healthy ways. Some of these may work better for you than others, so you may consider trying some of these suggestions or other ideas to figure out what might work best for you. 

1. Write Down Your Emotions

Sometimes, the simple act of writing your thoughts and feelings down can produce relief. So, you might try setting aside time each day for you to write about your emotions, even just a couple of sentences or for a few minutes, to release what you are thinking and feeling onto paper.

This can serve the immediate purpose of transferring your thoughts and feelings from your head onto paper. You may notice a reduction in both the volume and intensity of unwanted thoughts and feelings throughout the rest of your day as a result of this exercise. Sometimes, just knowing that you can return later to what you have written if you choose, may allow you to leave them on paper for the time being. You may also use such writing to process and better understand what you're thinking and feeling. 

2.  Spend More Time Doing Things You Enjoy

If you want your emotions to change, you may want to look for changes that you can make in your actions. Start to notice what things leave you feeling great and energized, versus those activities that leave you feeling cynical and drained. Then, try to fit more of the things into your week that produce more positive results in your life.

3.  Spend More Time With Positive People

If you are experiencing a lot of negative emotions, it may also help to consider who you are spending time with and to try to spend more time around people who encourage you and lift you up. If possible, it may help to reduce the time you spend around those who are negative, discouraging, or in other ways unsupportive, and instead spend more time with your friends and family who are positive, affirming, uplifting, and encouraging. It may be that just spending more time in the company of others who are emotionally healthy can create positive change in your emotions.

4.  Take Up A New Hobby

Finding a new hobby you enjoy can have many potential benefits. It might serve as just the distraction you need to focus less on painful emotions. This hobby may also begin to produce more positive emotions as well. You could find yourself feeling pride in what you are accomplishing through your hobby, regardless of the specific activity you choose. 

5.  Maintain Healthy Habits

Another area to consider can be your daily habits and self-care routines, to ensure you are creating opportunities for yourself to feel good, healthy, relaxed, and rested. This might include a wide range of things, such as: 

• Eating healthier

• Exercising

• Taking appropriate measures to get enough high-quality sleep

• Adding some regular pampering to your schedule, such as a massage, manicures/pedicures, facials, bubble baths, and movie night with good friends.

Exercise can be a great outlet for your emotions that helps promote a healthy mind and body. If you currently have an inactive lifestyle, choosing a regular exercise activity like walking, running, yoga, or weightlifting could help boost your mood and fight negative emotions.

6.  Meditate

Meditation can be another great way to foster positivity. It can help you find a sense of calm that also complements the other techniques we've mentioned. You can learn to balance your emotions and deal with them more effectively through meditation.

Meditation can also help you learn how to not hold onto thoughts and feelings as they arise. Has an idea ever caught your attention, and suddenly you were overthinking, worrying, and overcome by anxiety? These thoughts may get less overwhelming as you learn that you don't need to react to them, that they can just come and go.

Further Help With Difficult Feelings

If you want additional help, a therapist can help you understand your emotions, the things that may prompt them, and ways to manage them. There are many ways that you can connect with a therapist. You can get a recommendation from a doctor, begin with your insurance provider, or look up counselors online. You can even sign up for an online counseling service.

Research shows that online counseling can be an effective way of helping people with high levels of difficult emotions find relief. For example, one such study explored the effects of online cognitive treatment for individuals experiencing problematic anger. It found that the individuals who received the online intervention “showed a substantial decrease in anger,” allowing the researchers to conclude that “brief online cognitive treatment can be effective for reducing problematic anger in adults.”

If you’re experiencing frequent bursts of unwanted emotions, you may find it helpful to reach out to a therapist when those feelings rush up. With online therapy through BetterHelp, you can use in-app messaging to reach out to your therapist anytime, and they will respond as soon as they can.  

You can check out reviews of BetterHelp counselors below from people experiencing similar concerns.

Counselor Reviews

"Curtrice is awesome! She really listens to me and empathizes with my challenges. A lot of our work revolves around stress and anxiety, and I have already been able to implement changes in my life using her strategies. She also makes me feel that I am not alone for feeling these emotions. I would highly recommend working with Curtrice!"

"Carly Stevens was my first counseling experience. I needed it when I didn't know who to talk to and how to deal with my emotions, and I don't regret it as I found comfort and stability."

Takeaway

You may not be able to talk yourself out of difficult emotions, but with the strategies in this article, you can learn more about their purpose and how to gain control of them. If you’re experiencing high levels of unwanted emotions, you may consider trying approaches like writing down your emotions, doing things you enjoy, spending time with positive people, trying a new hobby, maintaining healthy habits, or meditating. For additional help, you can connect with an online therapist.