How To Practice Self Acceptance: 5 Ways To Embrace Who You Are
If you struggle with self-acceptance, it may be helpful to know that you’re not alone. : sSelf-doubt and self-criticism are common, even among those you may perceive as confident or successful.
Here, we’ll explore the different facets of self-acceptance, which can be helpful for recognizing any issues that may be complicating your relationship with yourself. You will also learn some effective strategies for practicing self-acceptance, as well as some exercises to help you develop a more adaptive mindset about yourself.
Understanding self-acceptance
Self-acceptance refers to the ability to recognize, embrace, and fully appreciate all aspects of oneself, including strengths, weaknesses, and imperfections. Cultivating self-acceptance often involves working toward a compassionate relationship with oneself, where you can feel free to be who you are without judgment or validation from others.
It’s not uncommon for individuals to struggle with self-acceptance in the face of societal pressures, perfectionism, and negative self-talk. However, these challenges can often be overcome through mindful practices aimed at improving the thoughts and beliefs one holds about oneself, and building behaviors that accompany this more adaptive self-image.
Components of self-acceptance
UnderstandingIt can be helpful to understand the different facets of self-acceptance can be helpful. Philosophers studying the self, have uncovered some valuable insights about how we relate to ourselves.; bBy becoming more aware of these processes, you may be better equipped to work on accepting yourself and making peace with your experiences.
- Beliefs: Your self-concept refers to the set of beliefs about who you are and what you value. According to renowned psychologist Carl Rogers, this encompasses your self-image, self-worth, and ideal self (the person you wish to be). Addressing the beliefs you hold about yourself can be an effective way to build self-acceptance.
- Awareness: Sometimes, issues with self-acceptance can arise from a lack of self-awareness. Becoming more aware of your personality, habits, strengths, and limitations can help you recognize your aptitudes and areas for improvement. It can also help to develop an awareness of how others might see you, as there are some natural limits to self-awareness.
- Respect: Self-respect is another critical component of self-acceptance. This involves recognizing your inherent value and behaving in ways that honor your needs, values, and wellbeing. If you struggle with self-respect, a good starting point for improvement might be to address your inner dialogue and look for ways to engage in positive self-talk.
- Forgiveness: Just as healthy relationships with others hinge on forgiveness, forgiving oneself is a crucial component of developing a positive relationship with yourself. This often involves understanding why you made the choices you did, recognizing that mistakes are a normal part of life, and letting go of self-blame.
- Growth mindset: A growth mindset is another important facet of self-acceptance. Learning from the past, improving your habits, and embracing challenges as opportunities for growth can help you move forward with confidence. Over time, you may start to integrate your achievements and positive habits into your self-concept.
How to cultivate self-acceptance
Cultivating self-acceptance involves embracing all aspects of oneself, including imperfections. With these strategies, you can work towards a more accepting and loving version of yourself.
1. Celebrate your strengths
Giving yourself credit for your positive characteristics and accomplishments may be one of the more effective ways to adopt a healthier sense of self and may be especially valuable for working through moments of self-doubt or criticism.
This could involve recognizing what you’re skilledgood at, what you have achieved, or how you have grown in the face of hardship. Focusing on your strengths rather than your weaknesses can be a positivegood first step to building confidence and self-acceptance.
2. Focus on what you can control
Although there may always be forces beyond our control, focusing on that which you can control can empower you to make positive choices that you can feel good about.
For example, a person struggling to forgive themselves for a past mistake might benefit from shifting their focus to what they have learned and use that knowledge to make positive choices in the present.
Similarly, someone who is unhappy with their physical appearance may focus on improving their health, developing a personal style, or even cultivating their interests or intellect to help build confidence.
3. Check in with your values
Sometimes, we may struggle to accept ourselves if we feel we are behaving in ways that don’t align with our values. It may help to reflect on your personal beliefs and values and take steps to realign your actions with those values.
You might also consider the influence of social or familial values.: sSometimes, the norms and expectations of others can conflict with our own true values, which can complicate the relationship with the self. Recognizing this dissonance is the first step towards self-alignment, allowing you to make choices that resonate more closely with your inner truth.
4. Adjust your inner dialogue
Cultivating self-awareness can often be a matter of creating a more adaptive narrative for yourself. Try to notice thoughts of self-doubt, anxiety, or pessimism, instead replacing them with affirmations of your strengths and memories of your accomplishments.
It might help to think about how you would talk to a friend or loved one.: iIf you feel they wouldn’t respond well to the kind of criticism you are lodging at yourself, it could be a sign that you’re being too hard on yourself.
5. Fake it ‘til you make it
You may have heard the phrase “fake it ‘til you make it” to describe the practice of pretending you possess the qualities you want to embody. While it may seem simplistic at first glance, thisit can be a helpfulgood strategy for working towards the ideal self you envision.
In fact, renowned psychologist Alfred Adler developed the Acting As If technique around this concept, and the Hebbian Principle—"neurons that fire together, wire together"—lends support for this approach from a neurological perspective.
Self-acceptance exercises to try at home
These exercises offer a more methodical approach to assessing and changing the way you relate to yourself.
- Take inventory: It may be worth reflecting on the relationship you currently have with yourself, as this can help you build the self-awareness needed to intervene when you engage in problematic thought processes. The Self-Compassion Scale may offer some insights into the way you relate to yourself.
- Try a self-love meditation: This is similar to a metta (loving kindness) meditation, but directed at the self. To practice this type of meditation, find a quiet space to close your eyes and reflect on your positive characteristics, accomplishments, and aptitudes. You could also use guided meditations, which can be found for free online.
- Use mindfulness exercises: Like any skill, intentionally practicing mindfulness can help you become more adept at employing it when needed. Mindfulness exercises like meditation or deep breathing can help you take pause and shift into a more adaptive mindset when you experience anxiety or self-doubt.
- Conduct a self-evaluation: Just as a manager might use a performance review to highlight an employee’s strengths and areas for growth, you could use a similar approach to become aware of all that you have to be proud of, as well as what you might work on improving. A self-evaluation can help you cultivate the awareness and growth mindset necessary for self-acceptance.
- Journaling: Many find journaling to be helpful for logging thoughts, gaining self-awareness, and cultivating gratitude. A journal can also be a good place to set goals, track progress, and work through setbacks in a methodical, growth-oriented way.
Improve your sense of self in therapy
If you struggle with unhelpful thoughts about who you are or what you’re capable of, you may benefit fromit may be worth talking to a therapist. A licensed mental health professional can help you explore the roots of these thoughts, challenge negative beliefs, and develop healthier ways of relating to yourself.
Cognitive-Bbehavioral Ttherapy (CBT), Aacceptance and Ccommitment Ttherapy, and Mmindfulness-Bbased Ccognitive Ttherapy (MBCT) are threewo well-founded approaches that may be helpful for building confidence and self-compassion, particularly in situations where anxiety or depression may be complicating one’s ability to practice self-acceptance.
You can find therapists who practice these types of therapy through online therapy platforms like BetterHelp. Across a number of studies, online therapy has been found to be just as effective as in-person therapy, and tends to be more cost-effective. BetterHelp offers a convenient way to attend weekly one-on-one and group sessions, as well as complete helpful exercises and share journal entries with your therapist.
Takeaway
While it can seem like self-acceptance iscan seem like a state of being, it may be more helpful to think of it as a practice.: wWhen you encounter moments of insecurity, you can actively counteract those thoughts with ones that honor your strengths and acknowledge the possibility of growth. If you struggle with self-acceptance, consider connecting with a therapist, as they can help you learn to challenge unhelpful thoughts more effectively. Get started with BetterHelp to begin fostering a healthier se
- Previous Article
- Next Article