Does He Love Me: How To Tell If His Love Is True
When it comes to dating and relationships, the desire to find “true love” tends to be a top priority for most. If you are someone who is dating with the intent to marry or maintain a long-term relationship, it is important to feel confident that your partner truly loves you.
Though many are looking for love, it can be a difficult concept to define. The act of loving someone and accepting love can look different for every individual. If you are currently dating someone and have found yourself wondering if he loves you, there are a number of things that may help you determine if the answer is yes.
How To Tell If He Loves You
If you are trying to determine whether a boyfriend or current partner loves you, there are a few factors you can take into consideration. Initially, it may help to take the length of your relationship into account. If you have only been dating for a few weeks or months, you may want to give both yourself and the man you are dating additional time to get to know one another.
Though it is helpful to remember that neurologically, men and women are roughly the same, studies have shown that men typically take around six months to make the decision that their partner is “the one”. Still, every person is unique, especially when it comes to expressions of love. If you have been dating for a significant amount of time and still find yourself wondering if he loves you, there are certain signs and behaviors to look out for that may help you to better evaluate his true feelings.
Determine His Love Language
Over the past 20 years, psychological studies have explored the concept of “love language”. Research has determined there are five major love languages that people tend to utilize as a tangible way to express love.
If your partner has not verbally expressed his love for you, you may want to familiarize yourself with the five love languages to see which ones might apply to your partner. The five major love languages are as follows:
Gift-giving is a fairly straightforward love language that is characterized by someone who expresses love through giving gifts. These gifts don’t necessarily have to be large or expensive. Someone who frequently presents you with small or thoughtful gifts may be expressing their love for you. Thus, if your guy friend is constantly showering you with presents, chances are he's showing you his affection. So, does my guy friend like me? There's a big chance that the answer is yes.
Quality time tends to be characterized by spending uninterrupted, one-on-one time with a person. Someone who’s love language is quality time may show it by scheduling frequent dates, wanting to spend time at each other’s houses, or just generally making an effort to spend more time with you.
While it is not uncommon for the strength of a romantic relationship to rely heavily on physical touch and affection, some people may be more prone to showing their love through physical touch primarily. Physical touch love language has a vital role in a relationship, it can make you and your partner even more intimate. While it is important to consider your own comfort level when it comes to physical touch, a partner who is exceptionally affectionate with you might be expressing their love this way.
Words Of Affirmation
Positive verbal communication is another love language you may be able to identify in a partner. Though communicating openly tends to be an important aspect of most healthy relationships, someone who shows love through words of affirmation may often use kind, encouraging, and appreciative language when speaking to you.
Acts Of Service
Doing acts of service is another common love language for many. Acts of service are typically characterized by an unselfish action someone takes to help another. For example, if your partner is someone who enjoys assisting you with day to day errands, fixing things, or similar acts, he may be expressing his love through acts of service.
If you are not able to determine your boyfriend or partner’s true feelings for you through analyzing his love language, there are a few other steps you can take to get the confirmation or answer you are looking for.
Ask Him Where He Stands
Though love can be a beautiful thing, it can also be complex and tends to differ greatly in nature between individuals. If you want to know where your partner stands in terms of love for you, it may be best to ask them directly.
Again, open and honest communication typically lays the foundation for any healthy, lasting relationship. Still, the act of approaching this type of conversation with someone you are dating can be intimidating. If you feel you aren’t ready to ask your partner if he loves you, there are alternatives and ways you can better prepare to address the subject.
Give The Relationship More Time
If you are feeling uncertain of whether or not your partner loves you and you don’t feel ready to ask them directly, you may want to try simply giving the relationship more time. Taking a step back and evaluating the nature of the relationship, your personal feelings and your partner’s personality can be crucial when it comes to finding true love.
Additionally, if you’re feeling frustrated and have already given the relationship a significant amount of time, it may be beneficial to talk with a licensed therapist that can help you navigate the situation.
Benefits of Online Therapy
If you are having trouble determining your boyfriend or partner’s true feelings for you, online therapy may be able to help. A therapist might help you to better analyze and explore your partner’s behaviors, along with navigating next steps.
Online therapy provides an effective and more flexible alternative to in-person therapy.
Effectiveness of Online Therapy
Recent studies have shown online Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) to be equally as effective as traditional in-person therapy. Additionally, online couples therapy has been shown to have positive effects on 70% of couples who participate in treatment. Though you may not be at a stage where seeking couples therapy feels appropriate, individual online therapy may help you to navigate your unique situation.
"Matthew is a great counselor and has helped me tremendously. I first started working with him when my marriage and my life was totally falling apart. He helped me rediscover things in myself and fall in love with myself again. I am now much happier in my life and every time we speak I realize something new. My only regret is not starting counseling earlier."
“Mark has been extremely attentive to everything that I say. He’s not only provided me support but insight and encouragement to let me know I’m on a good path to self improvement and discovery. Furthermore, Mark has provided me valuable insight on my romantic relationship, specifically with learning more about the relationship dynamics and how to build a stronger, healthier relationship.”
While every person tends to express love differently, taking the time to get to know the person you are dating and determining their love language can be helpful in determining if their love for you is true. Still, love and relationships can be a challenging thing to navigate alone and help from a licensed therapist could be highly beneficial.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)
How do you know if a man loves you?
If he hasn't said "I love you" and you're wondering if he's in love with you, you can start by looking for the signs he loves you listed above in the article. When he talks about the future or spends time paying attention to you instead of others, it can be a good sign that he's falling in love. However, the best way you can find out if he loves you is to talk with him. Communication is often the key to healthy relationships, so there is a good chance you can work it out with him, if you continue to talk to him and discuss his feelings about you. It may be that he’s in love with you, but he simply can’t utter the words just yet.
How do you tell if a guy is falling in love with you?
If you're wondering if a guy loves you, or signs he loves you, pay attention to the little things that he does. Many times, the true signs are in the little things like his body language, the way he prioritizes you, or when he goes out of his way to try to make you happy. Other signs he loves you are that he asks for your opinion on things and he says nice things about you. If he does these things, there’s a good chance that he’s in love with you. Another way to know if he’s in love is if he exhibits the hero instinct. The hero instinct really means that he wants to take care of his partner, and have the respect of others.
How do you test a guy to see if he really loves you?
If you really want to see who's in love, the best thing that you can do is talk to them. As people, when it comes to people we love, we want to know that they feel the same way. If you're struggling to talk about it with them and are unsure of where you stand in the relationship, talking to a therapist may help you sort it out and see how to move forward. They may be able to help you pinpoint signs that he loves you or that he’s in love. On the flip side, they may be able to aid you in determining if he doesn’t care about you as well.
How does a man fall in love?
Not all men fall in love the same way. Sometimes a man who's in love reaches the point of realizing it very quickly. Other times men take longer to fall in love. They may want to have a chance to really get to know you and learn that they can trust you. There’s a good chance he’s interested in you when he wants to keep hanging out with you.
Love means different things to different people which can mean the path to falling in love doesn't always look the same. However, a man in love will generally be able to show you signs he loves you, including love messages, digital media posts, or showing you home love, meaning he even enjoys doing domestic things with you, like watching television, cooking dinner, and things like that.
What makes a man fall deeply in love with a woman?
Spending time getting to know what your guy loves can give you an indication on what will lead him to falling in love. However, what a person truly loves is different from one person to the next. While physical attraction tends to be important to men in the beginning of a relationship, to experience true love, there will need to be more to the relationship than that.
What are the stages of falling in love?
There are many different theories on how many stages of love there are. Signs that he loves you in this initital stage, or beginning, may include things like he's paying attention to you a lot more than anyone else, leaving the dating site that the two of you met on, and wanting to introduce you to his family and friends.
After the initial stage of love, the relationship continues to grow and deepen. When you reach this point you both have to decide if you love each other enough to continue to grow in the relationship. If he's in love with you, you may find that he talks about the future. While he may not seem like he's paying attention to you quite as much as before, the relationship is reaching a more comfortable stage. If you both stick with it, you'll reach a place of starting to realize love means choosing to love one another even when everything doesn't "feel” the way it did in the beginning..
How quickly can a man fall in love?
It's believed that many times men fall in love faster than women do. A man claims to love at first sight more often than women do. You may feel like you just met this guy and he's in love already. Now this might not be the same thing as "true love", which will grow over time, but he still may feel like he knows that you're the one. If he tells you he fell in love with you at first sight, there’s a chance he’s telling you the truth and not just trying to woo you.
Do guys fall out of love easily?
If you're looking for relationship advice because it seems like your guy is falling out of love it doesn't necessarily mean that it's over. If you’re struggling in your relationship, work together to address any of the challenges that you're facing. It may be that one of you or both of you haven't been paying attention to the relationship as much as what's necessary. You may also find it helpful to work with a couple’s counselor.
Below are additional commonly asked questions on this topic:
How do you test a guy to see if he loves you?
You shouldn’t really think of it as a “test.” If you get found out, he may think this comes across as childish and like you’re playing games. The best way to get a clear sign is by simply talking to him. By communicating you’re much more likely to get a sure sign and make your life easier than if you play around with games and “testing” him.
How do you know when a man doesn't love you?
There are certain signs that go hand in hand with a man who doesn’t love you. He won’t work to be a better person, he won’t make a big deal out of you or your accomplishments, he won’t talk with you about certain feelings, he will devote himself more to other commitments, and he won’t care about making sure you are part of his life. You won’t figure into his future plans. You won’t feel like his best friend. In short, he won’t be a loving partner.
What a man will do if he loves you?
If a man loves you, he will show that he wants to be your partner. He will be interested in your life and in your friends and family. He will find the right words for various situations. He won’t play games but will give you a clear sign of how he feels. He will talk about his feelings and won’t make big decisions without your input. He will prioritize your well-being over material possessions. He will be sure you feel comfortable around his friends—a guy likes to show off his woman if he loves her.
How do you know if a man is serious about you?
A man who is serious about you will be a loving partner. It is a good sign if he introduces you to his family and friends if he loves talking with you, if he chooses his words carefully, if he expresses his feelings and acts in a mature fashion in general. You should feel confident after about two weeks of what exactly you are. If you’re unsure, it’s because he may be afraid of commitment. Don’t hesitate to bring up the topic—if he doesn’t want to give a straight answer, that’s concerning.
How do you know when a man is unhappy in a relationship?
If he’s unhappy, he may not express his deep feelings to his partner. Know that a successful relationship, however, depends on open communication. If he won’t express his feelings to his partner, it’s a worrisome sign.
How someone looks at you when they love you?
What makes a man deeply fall in love?
- Previous ArticleHow To Recover From A Love Hangover
- Next ArticleHow To Find Love And Happiness